A Just Edge

This is the glorious tale of a dude named Ryan, who is a new Pokémon Trainer. This story recounts his super crazy adventures leading up to the newest Indigo League, and his encounters with the legendary Pokémon, Mew. This story combines elements of comedy, drama, adventure, friendship, and mystery to tell a (hopefully) cohesive tale. It'll be a very good story, I promise! I hope you enjoy it!

Theme Song
Numb - Linkin Park

Characters
Click any of the pages below to view the Pokémon teams of each trainer:
 * Ryan - The main protagonist of this story.
 * Kelly - A greater Pokémon trainer than Ryan, he accompanies her on the quest for badges.
 * Sophia - A vainglorious trainer whom Ryan eventually meets.
 * Rahul - A skilled trainer who accompanies Ryan and Kelly on their journeys. He is a friend (or not) of Alex.
 * Alex - A trainer who has amongst the greatest skill in all of Kanto, but is also sociopathic in his approach to battle.
 * Charlie - A fellow trainer, and self-proclaimed rival of Alex who later becomes a randomly seen person by Ryan.
 * Derceyes - The owner of the largest collection of Dragon Pokémon.
 * Gillford - The main antagonist of the story. He is a member of Team Rocket.
 * Forrest -The new Gym Leader of Pewter City. He is the younger brother of Brock.
 * Olivia - The new Gym Leader of Cinnibar Island. She is the daughter of Blaine.
 * Dylan - The new Gym Leader of Viridian City. He is a good friend of Blue.
 * Logan - An aspiring Pokémon Breeder who joins Ryan's group during their travels around the Kanto region.
 * Dean - A trainer who is also the younger brother of Alex.
 * Michio Kaku - A professor of theoretical physics at Smogom University.
 * Jesse Ventura - A professional, deranged Conspiracy Theorist.

The Story
'''NOTICE: I will try to follow the anime and games as best I can for fights, but I won't be limiting Pokémon to four moves (as that is unrealistic). I will also be using Pokémon Yellow stats for Gym leaders and Pokedex entries, as that is my favorite Pokémon game.'''

Episode 1: Adventure Times!
A long time ago, there lived a Pokémon trainer. He was, like many others, completely average; neither legendary nor extraordinary. But, like many others, he set out with the original goal of gathering badges to compete in the Indigo League. That was his only reason, really. There was no point or desire for him to try to catch them all. That would just be silly. He wanted only the glory of winning the tournament.

Nevertheless, he went out on his journey. It was a quaint little thing, his journey. The badges, of course, came naturally. First one, then two, then eight. And while the gym leaders each presented staunch opposition, none of them prepared him for the league. By the time he entered, the tournament had already done countless cycles. It was, quite frankly, a well-oiled machine which he had no business jumping aboard.

The first match went better than expected. He won in a rout, losing only a single Pokémon – his ivysaur. Verily, beginner’s luck took him only so far. His next match was a loss. It was neither a critical nor close defeat, as his opponent had lost three Pokémon to his six. But the boy was not devastated by this loss. Sporting a respectable .500 record in his first year, the boy was motivated to try again. And he did. The second year proved progressively regressive. He lost his first match. But he tried again. The boy, now becoming a man, tried this for two more years until finally stopping. Going, cumulatively, 1-4, he had not as much as come close to victory since his first one.

Upon his final defeat, the boy had not actually given up. He set out to acquire the badges again when he a met a girl. As soon as they started seeing one another, his interests in Pokémon faded. He did poorly against every leader, and had to face many of them several times. Finally, he ran out of time against Sabrina, losing a lopsided battle between her Kadabra and his Abra. His passion for Pokémon evaporated, the man settled down with his wife, had a child, and officially retired from the Pokémon scene.

Ryan was no Pokémon wizard like his father. No sir, he was a scholar. He went to the local middle school full time. It was heavy stuff. This explains, then, why he was ditching class. Noon it was, and there was not a person in sight. Ryan was walking down the road, tearing leaves apart with his little hands. It was so nice out.

Ahead of him, the path turned out from the road and onto a dirt path. He had time; he went with it. Walking down it, a queer sound came from ahead. It was like a screech, but more focused. More deliberate. Like a couple of cats fighting.

The lane curved outward into a clearing of grass, revealing several figures. Ryan squinted his eyes, blocking out the sun, as he approached them. There were two of them. Well, two humans. There was a multitude of other creatures. Ryan knew these to be Pokémon.

As previously mentioned, Ryan was no Pokémon master. He knew of some Pokémon, mostly the super common ones or the ones his parents owned. He was less attuned to the appearances of those which he had never seen before. He saw one, a Pidgey, which he could identify, but the other, a small blue creature was indiscernible from the legions of species he had only the most basic eye recognition toward.

The Pidgey took to the air. It spiraled upward before coming down again and shooting at the other one, like something that shoots fast. The other Pokémon recoiled from the blunt force, flying several feet away, before landing on its feet. It growled, baring its teeth and then lunged at the Pidgey. It showed everyone its little paws, deviously sharp, and thrust them into the Pidgey’s wing. The latter cried out in great pain, brushing the creature off of it. Creating a gust attack, it enveloped the little blue thing, and twirled it around. When the dust settled, when the Pokémon landed, it was asleep… or worse. No, not really.

Ryan continued watching as the trainer returned his Pidgey to the Pokéball, and the other did the same. The two shook hands, before parting ways; one trudging off into the grass, another back to the cobbled brick of the city. And he never saw those trainers again.

That battle was completely awesome! Ryan shook with the feelings it gave him. He had always wanted to be a Pokémon trainer, but his mother had never allowed it. He had quietly accepted her reasonless answers to his pleas for following his father’s footsteps before. This was several years later, obviously. A Pokémon trainer sets out when they are ten. Ryan, being fourteen, was not in prime position to set out.

Why not? Why does the age matter so much? It shouldn’t. He’s smarter than any 10 year old. If anything, he would be the better choice. He had to say something. So, Ryan took speed back to his own home, a query on his mind.

His mother was home early; he heard her in her room (what she was doing was no matter to us readers, though we may guess about it). Ryan was supposed to be at school, so he made sure to tip toe quietly in. He didn’t want to be yelled at, after all. Making his way to his room, he passed by his mother’s Squirtle – her household helper Pokémon. Ryan liked him okay, but this Squirtle had one notoriously dubious feature to his notably intricate personality: he was an unrepentant tattletale. Ryan crossed past the dining table, finding the Squirtle bent over sweeping. The Squirtle looked up as he came in, and a small, deviously delightful smirk came to its face.

Ryan made a frantic throw across the table, trying to grab the Squirtle before he could go tell Mother about Ryan being home early. But this Squirtle was a pro compared to Ryan. He knew. Hooky was not to be tolerated by a weasel.

The Squirtle’s dexterity aside, Ryan fell over the table and crashed onto the hard floor. He let out a reflexive cry of pain which did more than enough to alert his mother that Ryan was now home. The door opened, on the far hall, revealing the face of a woman, tall and dark eyed, her long brown her sweeping around the corner of the wood by more than two feet’s length.

“Squirtle, is that you?” she called out.

“Squirtle squirtle! Squirtle!” he replied, earnestly.

“Huh, Ryan’s home?”

Oh my god. She speaks Squirtle. How the heck can she speak his language?! Ryan thought these thoughts to himself, rightly keeping them to himself. His mother, however, was quickly walking down the hall. He would be found out.

“Ryan, what are you doing back so early?” his mother said, coming around to face him.

“Oh, hi mom. I got off early today!” replied Ryan, beaming up at her.

“You got off school early? Why did you get off early?”

“No reason…”

His mother’s tone turned serious, “Are you lying to me, Ryan?”

“What, lying? No!”

“You’re lying, aren’t you?”

“No, we just-”

“Don’t lie to me, Ryan. I’m your mother. I can tell when you’re lying to me!”

“Bu-”

“ No buts. Tell me why you skipped school.”

“I – I don’t know,” He said, lowering his head, “It’s just so boring.”

“Now Ryan, you can’t just skip school because you’re bored. Everyone has to go to school.”

He looked up, wide-eyed, “Not everyone. Pokemon trainers don’t have to go to school.”

“Th-that’s what this is about? You suddenly want to be a Pokemon trainer now? I thought we went over this.”

“Yeah, so what?”

“You’re too old, Ryan. Besides, you don’t have any ge-”

“I’ll just use dad’s old stuff. And we’ve got a lot of Pokemon here, can’t I just use a couple of those?”

His mother didn’t respond. She flashed a distraught look, of which he did not pick up. Among his wrecked posture, Ryan darted his eyes about. Sure, they had Pokémon. Well, there was Squirtle. Out in the back, they had a few ponds of the fish types, but those never interested Ryan. There were a slew of Doduos and Dodrios, but those wouldn’t do. He’d have asked for his father’s Rapidash (as that appeared the most capable warrior) if not for, when he looked up, he saw the way his mother was.

He really shouldn’t have brought up Pokémon trainers and his father at the same time (let alone, alone!). But he couldn’t help it. That fight had gotten to him. It was what he could have been, what he should have been. He looked around furiously for something within his vicinity, something more suitable for the current situation. He spied, of course, a single Pokémon lying on an out-window, bathing in the sun, having a riot of a time. He couldn’t tell if it was Persian, but he hoped it was. Ryan flexed his arm up and pointed to the creature.

“What about that one? Couldn’t I just take that one for a while? He can’t be one of dad’s favorites. I know dad wouldn’t mind…”

“And do what?!” his mother asked, incredulously.

“Well, go around and do Pokemon trainer stuff.”

“Do you even know what that means, Ryan? You don’t just set out on a random journey with no idea of what you’re doing.”

“Really?”

His mother faltered. Her son was right. That was exactly what they did. There was no denying it. Before she could answer, though, the phone rang and she carried herself out, away from her son.

Ryan sat up and crawled over to the window to see his prized pick. Ah, it would be glorious to take on the world, starting with this Persian! This was surely his favorite Pokémon (with his father’s Rapidash rapidly fading out of his stinted memory). He grasped up on the padded bed lay that it had dominion over and spoke: “Heya Persian! How’ve you been?”

“Aaaaaaabra…” the Pokémon let out in a low wheeze.

That’s not the sound a Persian makes! Golly! It was his father’s old abra. Dang it, Ryan thought. This was that Pokémon that lost him his father’s final match. He didn’t want that! Useless sack of something useless. Ryan stood up, irritated. He looked around for that dastardly Persian.

Seriously, not in a forced manner, Ryan’s mother returned to the room.

“That was your school.”

“Oh… yeah,” responded Ryan.

“They’ve told me about your grades the past few weeks. They’re terrible.” “Yeah…”

“And that is all because you have wanted to be a Pokemon trainer?”

“Uh, yeah that’s right!” said Ryan, ever quick on his toes.

“Then maybe it would be good to let you clear your head and go out for a little while.”

“Ah, you mean it? I can be a Pokemon trainer? Just like that?!”

“It will be better for you if you saw exactly what that means. Take your Pokemon and take your things, and go out,” she said in a defeated sigh, nodding up to the sleeping Abra.

“Bu-but… that’s not the one…”

He glanced back at Abra. It yawned long as it squinted back in his general vicinity. Aw shucks, Abra was his Pokémon now. Ryan swore he heard Squirtle cackling behind his mother.

Episode 2: Rick 'Em In The Rishpan
Splinters hurt. Ryan had one; he sure did. To explain to you accurately how bad his hurt would cause me to devolve into words and phrases too adult, too grotesque to be allowed. Let’s just say the sliver of wood he had jammed up his toenail hurt. Real bad.

This war scar had been added moments prior, when Ryan had stumbled over a bramble. He had never felt pain this horrible. He could barely breathe as he just sat there taking wave after wave of pain. He was only a mile into his Pokémon adventure. This was a great beginning. He attempted to sit up. Ryan quickly looked over his belongings – his Pokéballs, Pokédex, food, all that stuff. It was all intact. Just as he was about to go back to sulking in his ruin, Ryan caught a glimpse of a bugger.

Holy Professor Oak, it was a Pokémon! Ryan needed to catch all of them, or something like that. He reached down and grabbed onto Abra’s ball before throwing it at the bugger he saw. Abra came flying out of his ball upside down and screaming. He must’ve been asleep. Nevertheless, Abra got into a battle stance immediately, before giving Ryan a loyal “so how should I kill this guy, boss?” look.

Ryan shrugged before saying, “Um, Abra use your slashy-claw attack!”

Abra offered a quizzical, “Abra ah?”, quite unsure as to what to do.

“Uh… um… Abra? Isn’t that an attack?” Abra shook his head furiously, “What?! But you have claws! You’re saying you can’t use them?”

“Abra abra abra ra abra abra ah ah ra. Abra! Abra bra ra abra abra ah ah ah!

“Maybe I should try dad’s Pokedex.”

He fumbled in his pockets for it and whipped it out with a little grace. Pointing his Pokédex at Abra, Ryan said, “What’re his attacks?”

“Abra, the Psi Pokemon-“

“Yeah yeah. Just tell me his attacks. I know his name.”

“Abra’s attacks consist of teleport.”

“And…?!”

“Teleport is Abra’s only attack.”

“You’ve got to be kidding.”

The Pokédex did not respond. Ryan turned to his Abra, “Didn’t my dad teach you any other attacks, like a TM or HM or something?”

“Abra abra.

“SPEAK ENGLISH!!!”

“Bra? A’ra!”

Ryan had no clue what Abra just said, but what was he to do? They couldn’t communicate. He remained quiet and watched as Abra walked forward, his clawed (uselessly clawed!) hands outstretched in a sort of dazed feel through. But this was no feel through. He was attacking the bugger.

In Abra’s hands, blue energy began forming. Ryan smiled in delight. Yes, this was an attack! The Pokédex was wrong! Abra went right up to the bugger and released his blue attack; his psychic attack. It hit. The bugger made no sound as Abra applied his beatdown, but moments later, when the smoke began rising and Ryan saw no counterattack, he knew he’d won.

Ryan ran up to Abra. “Good boy, Abra! You got him!”

“Bra.”

Ryan, overly gleeful at his first Pokémon battle victory ran to the defeated Pokémon. It was all yellow, and it looked like a banana. Ryan liked bananas.

He picked the thing up, as it continuously smoked and did nothing else.

“What is it? I’ve never seen one of these before.”

“Abra.”

“No, it’s not an Abra, silly. Let’s ask the Pokedex.”

Ryan pointed his Pokédex at the creature with one hand, holding it with the other.

“Kakuna, the Cocoon Pokemon. Able to move only slightly. When endangered, it may stick out its stinger and poison its enemy.”

“Oh cool! It’s a poisonous one!”

Ryan laughed and swung the dazed Kakuna around.

“Abra. Ra ra!” Abra said in a cautioning tone.

“Shut up Abra, he’s mine now.”

Evidently, Kakunas do not like being swung around, because by doing this, Ryan got himself a stinger in his arm. His scream was shrill as it was loud, long as it was high. He dropped Kakuna and grabbed onto his arm. Shouting curses which cannot possibly be written out, Ryan kicked Kakuna. He began ranting about how it’s not fair that Pokémon fight humans and not other Pokémon. However, since he was now poisoned, Ryan was feeling ruddy terrible and needed to get to town fast. He paused his rant to quickly throw up. After that, he threw one of his spare Pokéballs at Kakuna, but it just bounced off.

“Aw come on… Abra, attack him again. Slice him!”

Per order, the ever faithful Abra attacked Kakuna again with his claws. Sharp claws though they were, Abra was not experienced with this type of attack. Not to mention, Kakuna had just silently used harden about fifty times.

Shockingly, the swipe attack did nothing. Abra let out a cry of pain, his tears falling hard and fast. He gingerly caressed his sore claws. He looked up to Ryan as if this was all his fault. Ryan was not watching, though. He was falling into delirium as the poison attacked his nervous system. His vision was going fuzzy. He had no choice. He picked up Kakuna again and began running. Vermillion City was closest. His grandmother lived there. He knew the way. They had a gym, so surely they’d have a Pokecenter. Heck, he didn’t have much of a choice.

Ryan did not wait for Abra. Kakuna continuously stung him in the arm as he ran, but Ryan bit his lip and held back his cries. This was his Pokémon. He caught it fair and square. He couldn’t just leave it. He would suffer through the pain of holding it.

Ryan came into the city, flying at a speed faster than he’d ever gone. He whirled past the houses and buildings and skyscrapers. He ran as far as he could for as long as his legs could hold out against the poison. And then, his vision went black. He dropped Kakuna and fell on the sidewalk.

Morphine is the greatest creation of mankind. Ryan had an IV in his arm. It was on automatic. Apparently he had been hospitalized, though he remembered none of it, and since then, nurses and Chanseys had attended to him. He just lay in his bed through all hours and pressed his button to give him more and more morphine. It was all a blur; he couldn’t even remember why he was here or what injured him enough to get so much attention. The only thing Ryan could think of was how much he loved morphine.

Nurse Joy gave him the hardest bone wrapping on his un-IV’d hand. As she applied it, like she had already applied it to his IV’d hand, she started making small talk. Ryan just nodded and drooled and winced at the hardness being applied and pressed his morphine button until she mentioned his Pokémon.

“Your Abra and Kakuna are in their Pokeballs at your bedside. I was going to mention them earlier, but you were sleeping.”

Then the memories came back. The fight, the catch, the run, the poison… he was a Pokémon trainer! Yeah, Nurse Joy, you’re treating a Pokémon trainer today.

“I just c-caught Kakuna, you know,” Ryan sputtered as best he could.

“Oh really? You must be a Pokemon trainer then. Have you given it a name?”

“A name?”

“Usually you name your Pokemon…” Joy said with a smile and a chuckle. Her eyes sparkled so much. How could they do that? Ryan shifted his position as his arm wrapping became harder and harder.

“Oh… well Abra doesn’t have a name.”

“Can’t you give him one?”

“N-no… he’s my dad’s Pokemon. I can’t do that.”

“Oh, but that doesn’t mean you can’t give Kakuna a name. After all, you caught it all by yourself.”

“I guess…” said Ryan.

Joy continued fixing up Ryan, replacing his IV and cleaning up everything. She brought the two Pokéballs off of the table and placed them in his lap. She smiled at him.

“You can take them out and talk to them. I know it’s probably pretty lonely up here alone.”

“Wait,” said Ryan quickly, “Was Kakuna hard to get in the ball?”

“No,” replied Joy in a high voice, “She went in fine. She’s tame.”

“She?!” Ryan asked.

“Oh yes, your Kakuna is a female. I thought you would like to know that before giving her a name.”

“Oh, thanks,” said Ryan.

Joy gave him one more smile (!) before leaving, closing the door behind her.

Ryan let Abra out immediately. The small Pokémon yawned himself awake and stared up at Ryan with its Brock eyes.

“Abra! Abraaaaa.”

“Aw, did I wake you up, Abra?” said Ryan, grinning, “Sorry about that.”

“Abra.”

“Yeah, I know!” Ryan laughed, not knowing what Abra said. Sometimes it’s good to just go along with things.

Ryan was more hesitant to let Kakuna out. Last time he’d touched this Pokémon, she’d stung him so many times, he had to come here. He looked over at Abra.

“Did Nurse Joy really get her in there?”

“Ra.”

“So she’s nice now? Not gonna sting me again?”

“Ra.”

“You better be saying yes, Abra,” Ryan said.

He opened up her Pokéball and let her out. He was both prepared to run out of the hospital and spam his morphine button dry if she attempted anything. But she did not. Instead, she just lay, occasionally moving her little face around, but never stinging him.

Ryan gave himself a shot of morphine just because he could.

“Abra, abra ah? Raa bra aaaaabra,” Abra said to the Kakuna.

“Eiieeiiinnggyyeie,” it replied.

“Abra! Bra.”

“Nnnnneeeennee?”

“Aaah.”

Well this was all very interesting, Ryan thought to himself. Well, except for the fact that he had no idea what they were saying. He couldn’t name her nnnnneieieinnei. That would be unsightly. But she needed some name. Ryan had never thought of naming any of his Pokémon. Verily, he knew not that Pokémon were given names. When he read the magazines or saw fights on the tele, they never referred to any Pokémon by name. Why was he supposed to just expect that to be part of the trade?

She was a Kakuna. She was yellow. She kind of looked like a banana. But he couldn’t call her that. That would be embarrassing when he went to the gyms and used her in fights. ‘Banana go!’ would just not work. Especially since he was a boy. They’d laugh. Yes they would.

Then, Ryan thought of the word Kakuna and he realized how similar it was to another word, to another pair of words. It was one of his most favorite songs he ever knew. It was one of his most favorite movies he ever saw. And surely no one would know of the reference to it unless he told them, or unless I tell you, the reader, here now. Which I cannot possibly do.

Ryan sat up as his Pokémon continued talking to one another. He couldn’t understand either of them. He didn’t understand how they, speaking different Pokémon languages, understood each other. But that is a debate for another time. Ryan had already thought up his name and he was ready to tell it.

“Hey Abra, I thought up a name,” said Ryan, leading to both Pokémon to stop talking and turn to face him, “From now on, let’s call her Matata.”

Episode 3: The One Where They Get A Badge
A few days and a few hundred milligrams of morphine later, Ryan was released from the hospital. He had been itching to get out for quite a while, as it was unbearable to be around Nurse Joy in the way he was. You know, without being able to move. Now he was fresh as he was sprung. It was time to go to Lt. Surge’s Gym and get his first badge. His mother had said that was the goal of all Pokémon trainers, and if he was to follow his father’s footsteps, there was no better place to start.

He knew the way, he’d been there before. As previously mentioned, Ryan’s grandmother lived in Vermillion City, which was the closest megapolis to his hometown of Acapulco. He would often sneak away from the drearily droll afternoon tea parties his grandmother held with his family to come down and watch Pokémon fights at Lt. Surge’s Gym.

He knew Surge almost always used a Raichu, but occasionally he’d use other Pokémon if there were a lot of challengers lined up. Ryan didn’t know many of them, just the Voltorb and Magnetron, but they were all equally fierce. He’d have to work some kind of plan up. As far as he knew, Surge only did single duels - 1v1 Pokémon battles. It was either Abra or Matata he would have to use. Thousands of trainers have beaten Surge, though, Ryan thought. He would too.

The walk was not long. Soon, Ryan had found his way, down by the water to the high-walled gym. There were no trainers milling about, but that was okay. He opened the large doors himself and walked in. Inside, he was quickly met with two people. One was Surge, a tall muscular, silver haired man, and a younger girl with pink hair.

“Yeah, that’s some Arcanine you’ve got. I’m impressed.”

“He’s been with me for a long time,” the girl responded with her shoulders shrugged.

“So, you’re training for the Indigo league? How many badges do ya have now?”

“This makes five,” she responded.

Surge laughed in his deep booming, “Well, with that Arcanine of yours, you’ll do great in the league,” Surge stopped laughing as soon as he came around the corner and saw Ryan, “Another one already. Ya wanna badge too?”

“Yeah,” responded Ryan, dropping his voice for the girl.

“Then, let’s go,” said Surge.

The girl smirked as Ryan walked passed her, his chest puffed out, his two Pokéballs presented proudly on his belt. Surge led him back into the gym, to the place where they fight.

“I’d normally use Raichu, but he just got done with a battle,” Surge’s voice rose to a dramatic scream, “So I’ll use Electrode!!”

He threw his ball in an impossibly curved trajectory, and the Pokémon came out. It looked like an upside down Pokéball, which made Ryan laugh. He, himself, let out both of his Pokémon to weigh them up against the opponent. Abra was good, but Ryan didn’t know all of his attacks. Matata lacked any mobility, but if she got close, she’d be able to do some damage.

Surge interrupted his thoughts, “Those are yar Pokemon?”

“Yeah, they’re all I have!” Ryan yelled back.

“Ya don’t stand a chance with either one!”

Ryan’s confidence shattered immediately, his lip trembling, “Wha… what?”

“Ya kiddin me? My Electrode could shock both of your Pokemon outta here together!”

“Do you really think so?” asked Ryan, timidly.

“Heh, yeah, I’ll even let ya use both of them against me.”

“Whoa, really?!”

“Yeah, I’ll shock ya either way. It’ll make the fight more interesting.”

Ryan kneeled down to begin his attack strategy, “All right, Abra, Matata, this is what I want you to do…”

Behind, the pink-haired girl, who was slightly taller and older than Ryan came in to watch. She folded her arms and leaned up against the far wall.

Abra and Matata moved into the ring. Since Kakunas can’t really move themselves, Abra had to carry her in. Surge, satisfied with his guaranteed victory, began the match. Electrode rolled forward, increasing its speed in a headbutt attack.

“Abra, go!” Ryan yelled.

Abra threw Matata, after she hardened, at Electrode, in a counterattack of headbutts. The harden was enough to stop the enemy, but damaged Matata more than it did Electrode. Abra, meanwhile was instructed to jump aside and try a psywave.

Abra charged up his psywave quickly before sending it right to Electrode. Electrode, still dazed from the headbutt attack was not deft enough to dodge it. The energy sent Electrode flying back, smoking and bruised slightly. Surge yelled to his Pokémon to try another attack, just as Ryan did the same.

Electrode began a thunderbolt attack. Abra was going to do a slashy-claw attack, but Electrode’s attack charged faster. He shot it at Abra, and it connected. Abra let out a low pulsating yell, interrupting itself through the electric shock. He stumbled back, hurt, but not beaten. In this time, Matata had rolled over to behind Electrode.

“Sting 'em, Matata!” Ryan yelled earnestly.

Surge tried yelling to his Pokémon, but it was too late. The stinger plunged into Electrode and instantly poisoned it. Electrode howled in pain, just in time for Abra to lunge in a high jump and come down with a heavy swipe across its face. The Electrode, furiously tackled Abra away, but the poison prevented it from following up with an attack. Desperate, Surge let out one final order.

“Electrode, self destruct attack!”

Electrode nodded and stopped moving. A bright light engulfed it entirely. Ryan simply stood there.

“Hey, do something! That Electrode is going to take out both of your Pokemon if that attack goes through!”

“What?” Ryan said, spinning around. He saw it to be the girl.

“Have them use a defensive attack.”

“A… defensive attack? I don’t know if they have any,” Ryan pondered, “Hey, Abra, do you have a defensive move?”

“Abra, ra,” Abra responded, confidently.

“Then use it! Don’t let that Pokemon’s attack hit you!”

“Abra abra!”

Electrode’s bright white aura started taking over everything, to the point where Ryan couldn’t see anything. It was getting real bad. He just hoped Abra had a move that could hold off this self destruct. Then Electrode exploded. In any other instance, watching someone explode would cause Ryan to do the same, but this is Pokémon.

The dust flew everywhere, and it went into Ryan’s eyes. He coughed and covered his face as the wind picked up, blowing his blue hair all out of place. Still hacking up dust and pieces of the gym, he looked up. His watering eyes could barely give a clear picture, but he did see one thing – a dark, flying shape. Well, that couldn’t be right. Nobody was supposed to be flying.

He blinked about thirty-seven times to clear his eyes. And he saw what it was. Abra, his pointed body in a controlled free fall, breathing heavily, all scratched up, Matata in his hands, but nonetheless conscious. In the crater of the explosion lay Electrode, knocked out. Abra landed a second later, setting down the Kakuna. They were both still in the ring.

Ryan had won. Though he did not know it, and probably would never know it, Ryan had just witnessed the first time in Pokémon history that a teleport attack was used to win a match.

“Well, I gotta hand it to ya, kid. You know your stuff. Never seen an Abra who knew psyshock or barrier before…”

Ryan simply beamed.

The girl must have watched him pull off that spectacular victory. He turned and saw her up against the wall, her arms folded, her heel pulled up against the wall. He smiled at her, but she didn’t look at him. Surge came up behind Ryan, causing him to let out a high scream that echoed through the gym.

“Sheesh kid, I’m just givin’ ya your badge.”

“Oh right, sorry. Thanks,” said Ryan, going quite red.

He pocketed the badge, and left without much more incident. The girl followed him out, and by the time they were outside, back on the road by the water, they were walking side by side. Neither one spoke. The air was as thick as something which is thick and also unmentionable.

The girl stopped up against a fence. She rested her arms on it and looked out over the ocean. Ryan stopped too, awkwardly standing behind her. He knew not of how to approach this. She was a girl after all. She could easily take it the wrong way.

“What do you want?” she asked.

“Uh, I just wanted to say thanks for the help… you know with the badge and all.”

She continued in indignation, “Surge really gave it to you, didn’t he? Two on one against one of his weakest Pokemon. You’re lucky I was there to take out his Raichu.”

“Yeah, thanks.”

The two stood in silence for a few more minutes.

“Well? You’ve said what you wanted to say. Aren’t you going to go now?”

“Um, I don’t really know where the other gyms are, and you are obviously going to them, so I thought-“

She turned around at this, bold fire in her eyes, “You want to tag along?”

“No… not tag along, just come along.”

“That’s the same thing!”

“No, no it’s not. Besides, I can protect you with my Pokemon!” he said, dramatically, if lamely.

“Protection, huh. Yeah, it really looks like you got me there.”

“Great!” shouted Ryan, “Where are we going now?”

“I am going to get my next badge.”

“But what is it called?”

“If I tell you, you’ll follow me,” she said.

“I’m following you anyway,” Ryan replied.

The girl did not respond to that.

“Hey, I’m Ryan by the way.”

She looked over at him, rolling her eyes, “Kelly. Fine, I’m going to Fuchsia City. ”

And thus, a brilliant partnership was formed.

Episode 4: The One Where I Don't Spoil What Happens
Kelly had paid for a boat down the briny, and graciously was Ryan allowed with her. They did not talk all the way to Fuchsia. Ryan didn’t mind. He was too preoccupied with his Thunder Badge. Not many people could get a Thunder Badge like Ryan did. He totally won his first gym battle like it was nothing.

The two silently got off the boat, paid their fare, and began the short walk into the village. It was dusk, but not all that dark out. The moon was out in full, and the village had many lights about that lit the way. Ryan was humming some Lion King to himself when he noticed a dastardly shape moving parallel in the water next to him. Not even stopping, he whipped out his Pokédex, like a boss, and pointed it at this shape. Because, surely, this was a Pokémon as his experience had thus far taught him. And he was right.

“Golduck, the duck Pokemon. Its slim and long limbs end in broad flippers. They are used for swimming gracefully in lakes,” the Pokédex droned out.

“Ah, cool. It’s a water one. I’ve always wanted one of those!” exclaimed Ryan.

Kelly shook her head and continued walking. But Ryan was adamant. He needed a new fighter in his arsenal. He reached down, and threw his two occupied Pokéballs out over the grass. Out came loyal Abra, and his Kakuna, Matata.

Before ordering them to attack, however, Ryan wanted to test something.

“Abra, show me all of your attacks before we start,” he began earnestly, “I need to know what you can do.”

Mr. Loyalty, aka Abra, did so, charging up his blue energy. But then Ryan, all bug-eyed and brash, screamed out with hoarse command:

“I already know about the psychic attack, so don’t show me that, silly!”

“Bra!”

Pokémon have only four moves, they sure do. So Abra went on to show Ryan his three other moves as the Pokémon trainer held his Pokédex out and had it read to him which moves they were. First, Abra created an electrical barrier around him which caused Ryan to go numb; that was his second attack, a thunder wave. For the third, Abra started moving around quickly, creating illusions of himself; and that was double team. Great Pokéballs, that move was useless, Ryan thought. Why on Poke-earth would his father have given Abra that?

But the fourth move wasn’t any better. Just seeing it made Ryan feel like he had woken up sucking on lemon. Abra squatted on the ground, grunting for eons like a certain yellow-haired man of a completely different universe which I shan’t mention for fear of the fanboys coming for me. Needless to say, the Pokédex called this move reflect. Of course, Abra also had the psybeam and teleport (oh no, that’s more than four moves! But we will just forget about that), but we’ve already seen those so no need to rehash them yet. And now you know all of Abras moves. Yep, they’re practically are all TMs. Ryan thought that it must have cost his dad a small fortune to buy all those TMs… and for what? Just an Abra. His father wasn’t rich. It wasn’t even his father’s best Pokémon. He looked down at that little guy and couldn’t help but wonder what was so special about him.

Little did he know Abra was thinking the same thing about his master.

Then Ryan pointed a finger at the wild Golduck who was still swimming at a lackadaisical pace. It was time to own this nublet.

“Attack that Golduck!” Ryan shouted at them.

They nodded in understanding and turned to face the swimming monstrosity. Sure, this was no Kappa, but it looked as diabolical as any river monster could. Ryan was not very familiar with either of his Pokémon’s attacks yet, so he did not dare give them order again on what to do. Instead, he allowed Abra to use its own eclectic arsenal of TMs that his father had given it (and would be impossible to ever find out). Kakuna would help by being a distraction or something. Who knows. Ryan just wanted Mataka to evolve so it could actually fight. The purpose of Kakuna was almost none, and he couldn’t understand how a Pokémon trainer (like himself) was supposed to level up a Pokémon which couldn’t even move, and had like no attacks.

Nonetheless, Abra alone got the Golduck’s attention. A psybeam to it caused the Golduck to stop its swimming, and jump out of the water. It jumped up in a graceful arc before landing on the soft grass in front of the group. Dripping with water, its red eyes livid, it bellowed out its name for all to hear. Yes, it was a Golduck. The Pokédex had already told them that.

It rushed Abra with its claws out. Abra screamed in fear because of how sharp they were. Kakuna grunted itself into a harden so that Abra could block with it. And Abra, not one to be shredded into pieces willingly, did so. He picked up Kakuna, and using her as a shield, blocked all of Golducks’s scratch attacks. Golduck, unsatisfied, tried a tail whip, wagging it in front of the two adversaries, but even that couldn’t lower Kakuna’s harden defense enough.

Abra then attacked, himself, and the psychic attack hit Golduck with a critical hit. Golduck yelped, singed and hurting. It focused itself back on Abra, but it hadn’t noticed Matata latching herself onto its leg. Golduck tried to shake it off, but it was too late. A moment later, Golduck felt Matata sting it. It was poisoned. Screaming in rage, it kicked Matata off of it, and focused on Abra. Using its most powerful attack, blizzard, it covered Abra in a cold freeze. Abra was barely able to move, and subsequently fainted.

“No, Abra!” Ryan yelled, helpfully.

But in this time, something extra-ordinary occurred. Matata turned all white, and began pulsating. Her attacks on Ryan, the Electrode, and now Golduck had evidently put it over the threshold. She was transformed. Ryan quickly pointed his Pokédex at this new being to see what he should call it.

“Beedrill, the poison bee Pokemon. It has 3 poisonous stingers on its forelegs and its tail. They are used to jab its enemy repeatedly.”

“Awesome! I got a Beedrill!” Ryan was ecstatic, “Hey, Kelly, see? Look what Matata transformed into!”

Kelly, who had stopped walking, and stood behind Ryan watching this fight, rolled her eyes, “Yeah, yeah.”

“Although, her name doesn’t really make sense any more now that she’s a Beedrill,” Ryan said.

He had completely forgotten that a fight was still going on. Only when Golduck threw itself at Beedrill, and Beedrill dodged with an air ascension, did Ryan see what was going on.

“Oh, we still haven’t got him yet. Well Beedrill, use your fury attack!”

“Rill!” she responded and attacked.

Golduck, consumed by the poison, had not the dexterity to dodge the fury swipes. Matata rushed it, and jabbed its pointy hands into Golduck. Golduck was hit two times! It stumbled back, preparing its own retaliation, but it was no use. The poison was sapping what strength Abra and Beedrill hadn’t already taken away. It collapsed next to the fallen Abra, and fainted.

“Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!” Ryan screamed!

If he had a hat, he would turn it around and get all serious before making the camera take a close up of his left eye, then throw his Pokéball all majestically at the defeated enemy. But he didn’t have a hat, so he just threw the ball normally. He also returned Abra and Matata to their Pokéballs, praising their valor and staunch readiness to his cause.

Kelly did not congratulate him, however. She once again badgered him and nagged him to death on the fact that he didn’t fight fair. Using two Pokémon to catch one just wasn’t right.

“Well, says who?” said Ryan with a fierce scowl.

“That’s just how it’s done,” she replied, simply.

“Well, I can do it however I want. You can’t tell me how to do it!” Ryan said, in tantrum.

Kelly cared not to pursue this argument, letting Ryan feel as if he had won it.

The two walked into town, and looking at the time, saw it was not even eight o’clock. The gym was still open! Kelly mentioned something about fighting tonight, and then began running off down a street to her left. Well, Ryan was all alone. He had no idea where anything in this town was. So he ran after her. She was faster than she looked, and Ryan was embarrassed that he could barely keep up. Indeed, his stomach was cramping within two blocks.

When he finally caught up to her, she was standing inside a large, one story building, with the door open. It was wooden, and planked across its walls and floor. Ryan, wheezing and coughing, entered into the quiet room, and saw Kelly standing a dozen feet ahead of him. In front of her was a tall man wearing blue. Ryan saw them bow to each other, then draw their Pokémon.

The man sent out a small little thing that Ryan knew was a Venonat. Kelly threw her own ball, and out came her legendary Pokémon, Arcanine.

“Whoa, Arcanine…” Ryan breathed to himself.

“Venonat, tackle attack!” The gym leader commanded.

The Venonat did so, throwing itself at Arcanine. Arcanine took the attack, growling softly, but not being damaged badly.

“Arcanine, fire blast!” Kelly said in retaliation.

Arcanine did so, creating a small collection of three pointed flame balls in his mouth. Then, he threw it out at Venonat. Venonat just stood there, its big red eyes shining in fear and hopelessness. The attack hit right on, burning Venonat, throwing it back against the wall. It feebly stood up, but then fell over, completely spent.

“Excellent attack, but you won’t beat me again!” the man shouted.

He threw his second Pokéball, and out came a Scyther. Kelly withdrew her Arcanine, and threw a second of her own. Out came a Raichu, but it didn’t look like a regular Raichu. It was darker. Ryan could tell by the tail, it was a female.

“’Aichu, thundershock!”

The Raichu jumped forward, readying an aura of electric around it. It focused this into a bolt of lightning, which came down right on top of Scyther. Scyther was affected pretty badly, as it howled out in pain.

“Now… Scyther… razor wind!” said the gym leader dramatically.

A tornado of who-knows-what began forming, but the Scyther did not attack yet. This razor wind must need some charging up time.

"Growl attack!" Kelly yelled.

The Pokémon did so, but Ryan could not hear it, nor yet even guess as to what purpose such a move had - for not doing any damage puzzled him greatly.

Then Scyther stepped forward and shot the razor wind at ‘Aichu. And it hit the poor mouse squarely. The razors all cut into ‘Aichu, causing massive amounts of cuts to form across its body. It fell to the ground, gasping.

“’Aichu?” Kelly said, with worry in her voice.

“’Ai, Raichu chu,” it replied, standing up.

“Okay, good. Quick attack, then!”

Raichu moved quickly back and forth, deftly bouncing off the walls and floor to confuse Scyther. But Scyther was not confused.

“Very well, Scyther use your slash!”

Countering the Raichu’s quick attack, Scyther ran forward and rammed its sword-hands down on the running rodent. ‘Aichu was caught off guard, and flew back, hurting badly. Scyther landed in front of it.

“Now, Scyther, finish it off with a hyper beam,” the gym leader said confidently.

Scyther moved forward, preparing the beam when Kelly tried something.

“’Aichu, thunderbolt!”

“Ai… chu…” it replied.

‘Aichu’s damaged state lent itself to a lethargic setup, giving Scyther enough time to get its own attack ready. As Scyther charged the attack,, ‘Aichu stood up and charged a second electric attack. Right before Scyther finished, and could aim at the Raichu, it released its thunderbolt. Multiple long blasts of electric energy rained down on Scyther, and sent it to the ground. It screamed out as the merciless blast hit it again and again. Quickly, its health drained, its stamina left, and it finally fainted. ‘Aichu had won. More importantly, Kelly had won.

Ryan didn’t bother listening to all the congratulations. He barged in and ran right up to the Gym Leader.

“I wanna fight too.”

The man nodded Kelly away, after giving her the badge, and took stance easily, “Very well, I still have two Pokemon left. You are okay with a two on two?”

“Yeah, sure,” Ryan replied quickly.

“Very well, let’s begin.”

“Venomoth, go!” shouted the man.

“Go Matata!” Ryan mimicked.

“Venomoth, use psybeam!”

“Matata, use twineedle!” Ryan mimicked again.

The two met, exchanging attack. They flew back and forth a few times, before Ryan switched his attack.

“Fury swipes, yeah!”

But fury swipes did little to Venomoth. The gym leader simply used sleep powder, and Matata fell. Following that up, Venomoth used a psychic attack, and because Matata was asleep, and defenseless, this thoroughly depleted the Beedrill. Matata fainted in its sleep. Ryan had lost round one.

“Well, do you have a second Pokemon?”

“Yeah, I do,” Ryan replied, “Go Abra!”

Abra came out of his ball, and immediately fell over. He was still damaged from his battle previously, and was in no shape to fight. Of course, Ryan had never learned about the stamina of a Pokémon. He had just thought all Pokémon are immediately healed once they go back in their ball. That’s how it was on TV! But this wasn’t TV, this was real life. And as Abra immediately had fainted, that meant Ryan had lost.

“Maybe you should go heal your Pokemon at the Pokecenter before challenging me again,” the man said, coldly.

Ryan nodded, dejectedly, before leaving. Kelly had, surprisingly waited for him. She seemed chipper.

“See, when you fight fair, you don’t win,” Kelly said to him.

“Hey, shut up,” Ryan scoffed, “Nobody asked you anything. Just take me to the Pokecenter so I can go beat him properly.”

Kelly laughed aloud as she led this novice boy out of the Gym, and back down the road to the Pokecenter.

Episode 5: Melancholic Madness
There comes a time when every Pokémon Master, such as Ryan, must come to terms with their imperfections. Be them tactical errors, or the sheer lack of talent around them, masters inevitably lose battles. And for those who see failure as merely opportunity, such things are held with light heart. But for those, like Ryan, who see nothing but wasted time in such defeats, there will always, invariably, be another long drop in the crater that once housed his confidence.

Kelly had bought a hotel room, and had gingerly offered Ryan company for the night (on the couch, really). At first, he hadn’t known what to say – this girl had not hid her disdain for him prior, so he didn’t know why she would offer such a deliberately awkward invitation. Luckily (or not), Ryan had just lost a brutal defeat to master Koga, and his Pokémon were all injured and such, being taken care of in the nearby PokeCenter. So, Ryan hastily declined Kelly’s offer, instead propping himself up between two waiting room chairs in the hospital. She had left without another word, which hadn’t caused him much concern at the time. He remained there, ever close to his three little Pokémon, and ever waiting for news of their condition.

Needless to say, he fell asleep about twenty seconds after he was left alone.

In the morning, to the good news that his Pokémon were healed, Ryan slugged awake. He had meant to get another look at this city’s Nurse Joy, but apparently she was off somewhere else. Darn. She must’ve been beautiful. And he had no idea what she looked like. Ah, well.

A Chansey with a trolley approached him, where he still lay in his makeshift bed, and handed him his Pokémon. When inquiring as to their exact conditions, well the only response was ‘Chansey, Chansey!’. One of these days, Ryan would have to learn some Pokémon languages. It would make this all so much easier. But maybe they didn’t have languages. Maybe they just babbled their names to humans and one another for no reason at all. They were Pokémon. Nobody could know. He would tell Professor Oak his theory if he ever met the guy.

He could barely gripe, though. The treatment was free, and Chansey had even brought him some nice fruit bars for breakfast. He sat up, thanking the pink Pokémon before going on his way. Sliding a fruit bar out of its wrapper and into his mouth, Ryan grimaced, realizing that these were apricot flavor. He took it all back. This wasn’t worth it at all.

Before leaving, Ryan made way to the free computer and rang for his mother, hoping to see how she was doing. Mother didn’t answer. He decided to leave a message.

“Hey mom, it’s me. Just, uh, just letting you know I’m still alive! I’ve been out here catching lots of Pokemon and stuff. I’ll have to show you them when I get back… I hope you like them, they have great personalities… Oh, and I got a ba-”

The call cut out, with the time full. He sighed. He hadn’t seen the ‘2 minutes for free calls’ sign posted above the computer until just now. That was just great. He grabbed his bag and left.

It was raining, and the road had already become full of mud pockets by the time Ryan set out for the Gym again. This time, he had his Pokédex out, and was punching in various search queries, searching for, well, a strategy to win. He needed the badge quick, for even though he knew Kelly was long gone, he knew where she was headed, and just maybe he could find her again at the next gym… if he was quick enough here. Hopefully she wasn’t mad at him for declining her previous invitation.

However, Dex was hardly useful; the only noteworthy thing it told Ryan was that he needed more Pokémon; that his Beedrill was absolutely useless. Well, thanks. He already guessed that with the Kakuna form being as horrible as it was. He turned to focus on the entry for Golduck, and looking over its known moves, he worked to memorize a logical pattern with which to use them for. His one knew blizzard and body slam, and that tail waggle attack. Golduck was easily his best Pokémon, as it had taken the collective efforts of both Abra and Matata to down him. There was no better time than a gym battle to test Golduck for the first time - if he won.

The doors were open, and Ryan was glad that no other trainers had arrived yet. He was slightly embarrassed to fight with other people watching. He stepped into the cold grove that was the battle area, squinting for a sign of Koga. There was nothing, not a single sound, aside from the rain patter coming from the door. Heck, the lights weren’t even on.

“Anyone here?!” Ryan yelled, his voice echoing several times.

No response came.

Slightly annoyed, Ryan ventured further inside. There was a sort of Japanese-style garden in the next room, with a great number of trees, and benches, and all that crap. As Ryan tiptoed through some tulips, he noticed a man sitting under a tree. There he was; Koga! Booyah, Ryan had passed the test and found him. Right? That’s what this was. Right?!

“Haha! I found you, Mr. gym leader guy!”

The scream that followed rivaled Ryan’s own at Lt. Surge’s gym a few days prior. Only it came from a man. A grown man. A gym leader. Koga had just screamed like a little girl. It sounded like a cat that had just discovered water. Ryan’s ears were hurting bad, gee golly! Evidently, Koga hadn’t expected anyone. Well, that’s what he gets for leaving the door open.

“I mean… who’s there?” the man stammered.

“C’mon, I’m going to get my badge now, okay?” Ryan said, grinning. “Look at how good I am now. I’ve really learned!”

The master saw it to be Ryan, who’s defeat yesterday was fresh in his mind, “Ah… very well, let me just turn on the lights,” Koga scowled.

“Great!”

The two moved out to the secondary battle arena because they battled in the other one yesterday and it would be boring to fight there again. Don’t question me! Lining up, the two readied their Pokéballs. Koga yawned. Ryan smiled. He had just thought up a really cool thing to say.

“Don’t worry, I’ll wake you up!”

Ryan went scarlet faster than… well, I don’t have a proper comparison for that. Let’s just say that Ryan was mightily embarrassed upon hearing himself utter those words which had sounded so much better in his head. He was grateful that Koga either hadn’t heard him or hadn’t cared. He couldn’t tell which. Koga was pretty stoic, yeah. So, on with the fight. The man threw his ball, and in turn, Ryan threw his. It was time to see how good Golduck was.

Koga nodded to Ryan, “You remember Venomoth.”

“No, I don’t. They all look the same to me!”

“Well, I’m sure you’ll remember him after this! Venomoth, psychic attack now!”

The flying moth of veno-metric proportions flew toward Golduck. Ryan had only a few seconds. He thought back to five minutes ago when he’d looked up Golduck’s attacks. That was a long time ago. He barely remembered any of it. But… yes! The most powerfulest attack, he remembered.

“Golduck, blizzard, go! Yeah!”

The time discrepancy caught up to Golduck painfully, as Venomoth’s attack had already come flying forward. A flash of light, and Golduck was thrown backward like a turtle on its back. Struggling to get up, Golduck was taking his sweet time. Koga was already shouting out ‘Toxic attack!’

“Come on, Golduck…”

But this toxic attack was seen by Golduck at the last minute. The blue Pokémon dove aside, dodging it just in time, and landing right below Venomoth, who helpfully stayed still for Golduck. Then, Ryan’s Pokémon began twirling its arms, and like magic, a blizzard just came up out of nowhere. Ryan loved how Pokes could do that.

Soon shards of ice and a full on tornado engulfed the two Pokémon. The Venomoth let out a scream a second later as it was thrown from the Blizzard, and onto the ground. There it lay like a delicious sack of potatoes, all frozen and stuff.

“Venomoth, get up!” Koga demanded. “Sleep powder attack! Now!”

But Venomoth was sluggish, and as it tried to perform a sleep powder attack, it missed again, hitting nothing but the floorboards (who, I’m sure, appreciated the rest).

Ryan grinned. He had them now. Sticking a single finger out in a gesture to the fallen Pokémon, Ryan yelled, “Golduck, body slam ‘em. Kay?”

“Gol-duck!”

He sprinted over to Venomoth, and loyally jumped in the air, stretching out his arms and legs in a perfect effort to body slam the poor ugly beast. Well, it looked like more of a belly flop to Ryan. Still, the bone-crunching sound that followed the beat down was assuredly loud, and not even Koga could deny that Venomoth was done. Yes! Finally, a Pokémon that could use its claws. Ryan would have to remember that.

Shaking his head, Koga returned his first Pokémon, and readied his second ball.

But, no no no. It was all wrong. Golduck looked to be in one heck of a bad time. How? He’d just won. It couldn’t have been… oh, no, Ryan though. It was a belly flop, yep. Now Golduck was not even looking at whoever Koga had sent out, and was just rolling around on the floor grabbing his poor stomach and screaming out in pain. Shucks.

“Gotta return him, then…” Ryan muttered to the audience.

As he did so, he looked up and saw the new opponent was a Koffing. Aw, heck. Koffings were unbelievably powerful. In all the shows he’d watch as a kid, Koffings were always the bad guys, always the final bosses and stuff. And they wouldn’t be if they weren’t beasts! He thought to himself for who to use. Well, it was an easy decision. Matata was just a Beedrill. He had Abra!

“Go Abra go!” he spoke.

Abra had learned well from Ryan’s style of training. Thank Snorlax. This time he was awake when Ryan called him. To Ryan, that meant the world.

“Ra? Abra’a ra.”

“Oh, thanks for telling me, Abra. Now go use psychic on that deadly Koffing!”

“Abra?”

“Come on, just go!”

Abra did so, turning his head to find the Pokémon when Koffing hit him like a train out of Nantucket. It was a pretty brutal tackle. Abra went spiraling, doing several impressive cartwheels before sticking the landing with his face. Ryan was about to interject with his important words of encouragement, but Abra seemed on top of it. He was barely damaged. Abra had rolled over and thrown his clawed hands to the sky. Blue energy formed and shot out at Koffing, who stood there, not even looking at Abra. Couldn’t blame him, though. The walls were very interesting.

The blast hit Koffing, and he let out a wheezing cough of surprise. Oh, and then he fainted. Yep, from one attack. Ryan had won this 2v2 battle like it was nothing.

“I’m so good at this!”

Koga jumped forward, returning Koffing in one fell swoop, “Very good match. You have proved yourself to me, and learned well from your mistakes of yesterd-”

“What mistakes? Come on, I want my badge!”

Koga blinked furiously, as if not believing someone so stupid could have just beaten him, “Yes, here it is!” he threw the badge toward Ryan, who lunged wild and far and missed it quite acutely. “Your Pokemon are impressive. The Abra must at least be level 25.”

Ryan, picking the badge from the ground, looked up, “Huh, what do you mean level 25?”

“Your Abra is highly skilled. To KO my Koffing in one hit like that, he must be very advanced. Of course, using psychic already means he has a TM. You have invested well in him.”

“But humans don’t have levels… what does that even mean?” Ryan asked, squint-eyed. “It means he’s long overdue to evolve. Most Abras evolve at level 16, unless they refuse… Has he refused?”

“Ra! A’ra abra abra abra! Bra ah!” Abra interjected.

Koga nodded, “I see,” and that settled it, apparently. “Well, Ryan, good luck with your journey. If you are heading to Cinnabar Island, you may use the soul badge to give Golduck surf. And then ride him. That’s less expensive than buying a ticket on a boat…”

“I can surf on top of Clawey?!” Ryan said, barely concealing his pure, unbridled joy. “That’s awesome!”

“Clawey?” asked Koga with a raised brow.

“Yeah, that’s Golduck’s new name. Cool, huh?”

Koga was no master of lying, that was for sure. But Ryan was too happy to notice. He ran out of that gym in chipper spirits, not only for knowing that he’d just bested another leader with his grand ol’ skill, but that now he could ride on Golduck like a surfboard. That’s all he’d ever dreamt of doing.

No worries. That’s what it meant. He had just got his second badge, and now he was walking down an abandoned trail toward the water. Ryan had all three of his Pokes out, like one parades around in a showy tee shirt. There was just one problem. Nobody was around.

Humming to himself, and ignoring the deep philosophical conversations Clawey and Matata were having behind, he came to a break in the road, with a path pointing either way, and a huge tree in front of him. There wasn’t just a tree, either. He saw something. It was a Pokémon! All of the others stopped upon seeing it, and Ryan squatted down on the ground. You know, the better to hide from it.

The Pokémon was a long, slender thing. Blue and white, and it had – no joke – wings for ears, and a horn for a nose. Ryan thrust his Dex out to get a reading. But Dex was being difficult, by gum.

“There is no Pokemon in range.”

“Dex, I’m looking right at it. Are you blind or something?” Ryan asked.

“There is no Pokemon in range.”

“Ahh!” Ryan put the Pokédex away and turned to his spectators. “You guys see it, right? Right?”

“Ra.”

“Duck, golduck.”

“Eeieineneieine.”

Yeah, they saw it. That is exactly what they just said.

Ryan knew what that called for; a Pokéball to the face. Pulling one from his belt, Ryan did a reverse ballerina spin, twirled his arms, and swung back his arm for a fierce overhand throw. He was so good at this. He should be a professional. The ball hit the dang animal directly in the face! But… wait. It didn’t capture it. The ball didn’t even open. And the Pokémon didn’t seem one bit phased by being hit in the face with a foreign object. There was one thing, however. It could just be a coincidence, but as the ball had hit this Pokémon’s face, an errant yell rang through the woods. Some little girl was pretty darn angry.

The bushes rustled, and up came the girl. She threw the Pokémon off of her shoulders and sprinted down to the onlookers with a look that could kill a mongoose.

“Hey, what’s the big deal? Can’t you see I’m tracking Traxus Rex!?”

Ryan did not, of course, “Who?”

“Traxus Rex! My Dragonite! I was so close to getting him. Can’t you just go away, creep?”

“Hey, I was just trying to catch the snake-with-wings-for-ears… I didn’t know you were tracking him.”

“That? Oh you mean Percival Scrawnius Tazomarius. He’s just a stuffed animal.”

“Then why were you going out in public with it?” asked Ryan, innocently enough.

“Hey! Don’t question me. I was tracking Traxus Rex!”

“You already said that,” Ryan rolled his eyes, rather annoyed. “Look, just move out of the way, little girl, so I can catch ol’ snakey.”

“He has a name, you know! It’s Trax-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Ryan waved her away and took up point. He had just seen some movement. The real stuffed animal was on the move. No wait, that wasn’t right. Stuffed animals weren’t real. He glanced back over to the girl. Well, maybe not for most people. But there was another creature moving and it wasn’t the stuffed animal. It had the same ears and nose. This was the real one.

“Hey, hello? Are you listening to me?”

Ryan whispered back at her trying to hide his annoyance, “No, I’m about to catch Thurnax.”

“WHAT?!?!” she screeched. “His name is Traxus Rex! You can’t change that. I already named him like a year ago. That’s not fair!”

“I don’t like that name, so it’s not gonna be his name,” Ryan explained, simply.

“Hey, he’s not yours!” she said, pushing out of her way, and running to grab her stuffed animal.

“He will be,” Ryan shook his head, and took Dex back out. Now that he saw the real animal slinking about in the brush, he pointed toward it.

“Dragonair. According to a witness, its body was surrounded by a strange aura that gave it a mystical look.”

“A dragon! Yeah! All right, let’s get it,” he said to his Pokémon congregation.

“Oh no you don’t,” came a voice high and shrill, “I’ll fight you to protect him!”

It was the girl.

“Seriously? I’ve beat two whole gyms. There’s no way you’re better than me,” Ryan countered, proudly.

“I don’t care about those. Gyms are for stupid people. Anyone can get all the badges. But my Grandmother says I’m an explorer,” she beamed, “so I’m doing things you couldn’t even think of! Oh, and I’m Sophia by the way!” she added in a breathless, irrelevant, rage-inducing quip.

She drew her Pokéballs. And while Ryan prepared himself, he could only think of how much he missed Kelly.

Episode 6: Yes, A Bubble
Here was a girl, a crazy girl, who wore a cornucopia of vibrant colors plastered around her body. She snatched her precious stuffed animal – who’s name Ryan could not possibly remember – into her hands, all while beaming furiously towards him. Clearly, she had been using it to lure out a real Pokémon of the same species; one that she wanted to catch. There it was now, slithering through the bushes much like a snake. But it was much more graceful than any one-eyed snake could be, Ryan knew that for sure. It was a Dragon. It was a Dragonair. And Ryan would catch it.

The small girl’s face contorted into an expression which complemented her attire of clown vomit quite nicely. Seeing the boy opposite her throw his attention toward the bush made her react in reflex to save what was rightfully hers. She snatched, quickly, three dragon balls from her sparkling belt and threw them toward Ryan (though if one was a keen observer, one might reckon she had thrown them at him). Out popped three of the finest Pokémon this Pokeworld had to offer. Ryan quickly scanned them with his Pokédex, finding them to be a Vaporeon, a Drowzee, and a Spearow. Blimey, Ryan thought. These would be his greatest test yet.

Still, as he stepped forward to combat Sophia’s army, Ryan felt a sense of calm rush over his body; an air of confidence, if you will. He looked down to his three, equal, Pokémon standing on either side. He nodded to them, before throwing his voice back to the girl:

“Abra, abra bra ah abra!” Ryan shouted to, unsurprisingly, Abra. His Pokémon nodded back, and then jumped like twenty-seven feet toward the enemies.

“Golduuuuuck! Duck duck duck!” Ryan screamed again, this time causing Clawey to spring up in likewise action.

“Ieiieieeeeeeieheiiehsieh!” Ryan bellowed, shaking the very trees that stood around them. Since Matata was a flying Pokémon, she couldn’t really jump twenty-seven feet like the others, so she just flew there.

Ryan’s confidence in speaking in PokeTongues had disallowed him knowledge of what his Pokémon were actually doing, or if their strategies were paying off, but that was unimportant. The real goal of any trainer was to just catch ‘em all. So he let his Pokemon do their thing, and turned his attention toward that slithering snake. He got down on all fours, and began stalking it like any good trainer would do. He found the Dragonair to be so slow, that even in his crouch-walking through the bushes, Ryan could easily gain on it. When he was within a few feet, he pounced, jumping on the creature, wrapping his two little arms around it, and swinging himself back and forth in a manner not unlike someone trying to extinguish themselves from being on fire.

He tackled that beast good. After a few rolls, Ryan heard the Dragonair cry out, and go limp. Puzzled by this, Ryan sat up, and peered forward. Then did he see a large bloody gash on the Pokemon’s otherwise light belly. It was a fresh, open wound, as it still bled. Ryan noticed he too had been doused in the creature’s blood. But that did not concern him. He had seen it wounded, and that was enough for the boy to lose his whimsical disposition. Ryan jumped up, and ran to the Dragonair’s head.

Kneeling down, he spoke softly, “Hey, you’re hurt… Oh, jeez. That’s pretty bad. We need to get you to a Pokecenter!”

“Neeeee...” it groaned.

“Here,” Ryan said, taking out a spare Pokéball, “Let me catch you, and I can take you to one.”

“Neeee! Eee!” it whined in distress, pulling away from Ryan as far as it could.

“It’s not a trick, I swear. Please… you’ll die if I don’t help.” Ryan said, exacerbated. The Pokémon didn’t seem to believe him, as it continued to slowly pull itself away from him. Ryan stood up and followed it, this time raising his voice, “Look, I just want to help! I won’t keep you if you don’t want. We’ll just take you to the PokeCenter to get you fixed, and if you don’t want to stay with me, I won’t make you! You can go back into the wild once you’re better! I’m just trying to help.”

At this, the Dragonair stopped, and quipped softly before turning to Ryan. It raised its long head off the turf, to the trainer’s height, and stared into his eyes. He could see it fighting to even stand up, for its wound had made the creature exhausted. Though he didn’t fully know the meaning of this gesture, Ryan took it as what he had hoped. Raising trembling his hand with the Pokéball in it, he opened it; in an instant, the dragon Pokémon closed its eyes, and let itself be sucked inside.

Pocketing the Pokéball, Ryan ran back to the trail only to find his three Pokémon in the midst of a battle. He would be lying had he said he remembered what they were doing. So much had happened since he had sent them to battle Sophia and her minions. He noticed his Pokémon were completely dominating Sophia’s. Yet, he didn’t have time to gloat over the pompous girl.

“Guys, we have to go! Now!” Ryan shouted.

The three looked up with faces of ‘oh come on!’, but seeing the pressing concern of their master, stopped the slaughter. Abra and Co. jumped off of the beaten Drowzee, Vaporeon, and Spearow and loyally followed their master off.

Evidently insulted by the sudden lack of attention, Sophia pouted her lips and chased them down.

“Stop! You can’t just leave right when I was about to beat you!”

Ryan shrugged her off and continued jogging ahead.

“Hey, hello?! Are you listening to me?”

Ryan sighed and slowed to a walk, “Look, I have to go. It was great battling you, but we’ll have to finish that later.”

“Ha!” Sophia proclaimed proudly, victory flush in her face, “I knew it! You’re running away, coward! You couldn’t beat me. Yes! That means Traxus Rex is mine!”

“Who?” Ryan asked.

“The Dragonair, you dummy,” she responded with contempt.

“Cool. By the way, do you know where the nearest PokeCenter is?”

Sophia stopped her jubilation for a second to process the question. “You can either go to Fuschia City or Cinnabar Island.”

Ryan shook his head. “Well, I just came from Fuschia City, and that’s pretty far back.”

“Then go to Cinnabar Island!” Sophia said, again using her contemptuous voice, “It’s just that way, south. You can’t miss it. All you need is a Pokemon with surf to get there.”

“Okay.”

Then, Sophia stepped forward, with her chin thrust up. Lo, the jubilation had returned “See, arentcha glad I was here? After I beat you so gracefully (because my grandmother told me that’s how a proper princess should act), I was so nice telling you how to get to Cinnabar Island!”

“That’s great,” Ryan said, barely paying attention to the babbling.

Sophia started twirling around, spinning her vibrant clothes in a whirlwind. She closed her eyes and raised her arms as she did so, because that’s what all self-proclaimed princesses do. “You’re lucky I’m so smart. My IQ says I’m a genius, really! I got it tested you know!” She said, humming between sentences.

But when Sophia opened her eyes, Ryan, and all his Pokémon were gone. She sighed something about him leaving out of shame, then went back to collect her stuffed animal, and go catch that Traxus Rex.

Ryan hadn’t felt obligated to tell Sophia that he had taken the Dragonair already, because she was as annoying as the trees were green. He stood on the edge of the water, looking out to the sea. It was a remarkably clear day, and had been since he had left Sophia. Heck, he could see Cinnabar Island from where he stood.

Returning Abra and Matata to their Pokéballs, Ryan instead focused on Clawey, his Golduck. Being that Clawey had the move surf, this was Ryan’s only option to get to the island other than paying for it; and he didn’t have much money to be spent frivolously. “All right, Clawey. We need to get to that island way out there. So you’ll use surf on the water, and I will ride on you, and it will all work out, ok?”

“Duck, gol,” Clawey whimpered.

“Great! Let’s go!”

Ryan climbed on top of Clawey, and pointed ahead, directing his steed into the sparkling water of this glorious summer day. Now, Golducks are small beasts, closer to the size of a lynx than a water-horse or luxurious yacht. So, the mounting and riding was more than a little awkward. The Golduck grumbled mightily as the unfathomable weight of his master pressed down upon his meager shoulders. Ryan assured him they would stop for nothing, which did partially alleviate Golduck’s hapless state. He just hoped they wouldn’t find any water Pokémon out there who would cause the them problems. Then, Clawey went off, surfing through the water with his master on top.

It was an hour later that the vastly oversized Ryan riding the vastly undersized Pokémon came surfing into Cinnabar Island at top speed being chased by numerous Tentacools and Tentacruels. Surely, their trip had not gone unnoticed, and had it not been for Clawey’s speed, they would have surely died. As the two barreled in, Clawey’s momentum was too much to cancel out. The result left Ryan flung from the back of his loyal steed, and into the sandy beach of Cinnabar. While the boy himself was sunburnt, hungry, and sporting many scrapes from the landing, he gave no pause – instead, returning Clawey to his ball, and running ahead, to the entrance of the only city he could see.

There was a PokeCenter near the center of the island, where Ryan dropped the wounded Dragonair off. Nurse Joy gave him a precise time of ‘several hours’ for it to be healed, so Ryan went to the adjoining PokeMart and bought several healing potions, some Pokefood, and a few new Pokéballs with the money he had won from besting Koga. Then, settling down, he went to a restaurant to deal with his rumbling stomach. After ordering a sandwich, guilt overtook Ryan, and he let his three Pokémon out, and fed them too. As the four sat there, conversing (which was more like Ryan hoping his Pokémon could understand him), there came a person who sat down on the table next to him. And her face was known to Ryan, it sure was.

“Kelly!” Ryan beamed, smiling and waving to the older girl.

“Huh? Oh, it’s you. You finally got here. Took you long enough,” she said, quietly.

“Hey! You were the one who disappeared after we beat Koga,” he reminded her.

She shook her head, her long pink hair waving violently from side to side. “I never thought you would beat him. There was no point waiting. Besides, you didn’t even want to stay in the room with me. So I thought you were going off on your own adventure.”

“Naw,” said Ryan, laughing, “I was just worried about my Pokemon was all. I guess it doesn’t matter. We’re just here for another badge, right? You prolly have yours already. Maybe after I get this one, you won’t run off again. That would be awesome.”

Kelly slumped her shoulders, and looked down, shaking her head. “No, I didn’t beat Blaine yet. His fire Pokemon are strong, Ryan. My Wartortle was no match. I’m going to have to train for a few days here so I can go back to beat him.”

“Well then, can I train with you too? My Golduck probably could use some extra practice. And that’ll give the Dragonair plenty of time to heal!”

Kelly looked up, with her mouth agape, “Dragonair? You caught a Dragonair?”

“I didn’t really catch him. The deal was he’d get in the Pokeball and I would take him to the nearest Pokecenter to get healed.”

“You’re such an idiot,” Kelly breathed.

“What, why?” Ryan replied, genuinely confused.

“It’s not your Dragonair if you didn’t catch it.”

“I-”

Kelly leaned back in her chair. “Look kid, it doesn’t matter. Maybe you’ll keep it, maybe you won’t. But you didn’t catch a Dragonair. Let’s just finish eating so we can go train.”

Ryan obliged, and hastily consumed his food. Thereafter, he accompanied Kelly down to the beach, where they had a nice walk before finding a place to set up at. He let out his Pokémon again, to socialize with Kelly’s. While that went on, the two trainers agreed it would be a waste of their precious money to pay for another hotel, so they set up sleeping bags above the tide, and drew up plans for how to improve their Pokémon by flashlight, throughout the night.

Perhaps it was his mind playing tricks on him, but Ryan swore that, as the sun set, and everyone started drifting off to bed, he saw something in the sky. If he had to describe it, he would have said it was a pink bubble, and a large one at that. He noticed it fly about in the sky for a while, and it seemed to be playing – like a young bird plays with a walnut. And the thing started to drift closer and closer to the camp as time progressed. As Ryan fell to sleep though, he thought he saw two large eyes looking at him through the pink bubble. No, that couldn’t be right, he thought. He must be dreaming.

Episode 7: Decidedly Mild
The next day, the two trainers arose and began planning for Blaine, the fire gym leader. As he was one of the most experienced trainers – and the two had but a single water Pokemon apiece – they were forced into bettering those Pokemon through battling one another. After a few hours of Wartortle and Golduck’s workout, though, the two decided to take a break. Being so near the island’s volcano, they decided to go explore that, because the story’s plot demands it.

After an uneventful travel across the black beach, toward a muddy grotto at the base of the great volcano, the two noticed a crack in rock-face. Peering in, they noticed a large, hollowed out cave, with crags of magma flowing about. And in the center, huddled together in a collective ball, were a slew of red Pokemon. Ryan’s heart skipped a beat as he unconsciously grabbed his Pokedex and pointed it at the group of red animals.

“Charmeleon, the Flame Pokemon. Tough fights could excite this Pokémon. When excited, it may blow out bluish-white flames.”

“Yes!” Ryan yelled, pumping his fist into the air, “I’ve always wanted one of these! You know, Charmeleon evolves from Charmander, who’s my favorite starter, Kelly.”

The older girl ignored him.

“Fine then. I’m busy catching Pokemon, anyway. Matata, I choose you!” Ryan unhooked Matata’s Pokeball, then did a masterful spin before chucking her through the small looking hole. Upon letting her out, he quickly ordered her to use focus energy on the nearest Charmeleon.

The move had little effect aside from waking one of the beasts and making it sleepily, lazy, quiet growl toward Matata’s general vicinity. This formidable attack left Matata shivering and quite scared. It was a fearsome growl!

“Now use fury attack, Matata!”

Matata obeyed, and roared toward the creature. Charmeleon was taken aback by the speed of the Beedrill; it was quickly overcome by several quick hits. Charmeleon stumbled back after the fourth hit and retaliated with a quick ember attack. Matata was hit head on, and after being engulfed by the flames, fainted.

And despite Ryan’s surprise, Kelly, who was watching the fight unfold, simply laughed. “You really don’t know anything about Pokemon, do you?”

“Why would you say that?” Ryan retorted with a look of sheer displeasure.

“If you did, you would know that bug types are weak against fire. We went over this this morning. Water beats fire. It’s how we’ll beat Blaine. You should have used Golduck against Charmeleon if you wanted one so bad.”

“Well, I’m not done anyway!” Ryan said, his face flushed. “Go old faithful!”

Like a magnificent geyser, Abra shot forth from his Pokeball. He landed in the cave, scratching the back of his head and yawning. “Brah? Rah rah Abra!”

Ryan nodded. Yeah Abra, tell them who’s boss. Sing it sister.

Suddenly, like a fly hitting a windshield, Abra was engulfed by red hot flames. “Abraaaaa!” he screamed in pain and surprise. The villainous Charmeleon was standing fierce, opposite of the psychic Pokemon. He was not about to be caught without a fight.

“Oh jeez!” Ryan said in shock. “A-abra, are you okay?”

“Ra!” replied Abra, extra crispy. The smell of him made Ryan’s mouth water.

“Okay, then use Thunder Wave!” Ryan commanded, pointing to the Charmeleon.

His Abra obeyed and shot the electricity from him like he was a proper pikapi. Charmeleon just sat there and absorbed the shock and was also shocked. It was incredible. The yellow bolts jumped across his body like fleas and soon Charmeleon fell to his knees and howled out in pain.

Ryan whooped a good whoop. “Ha! Charmeleon is paralyzed! It may be unable to move,” he recited, his finger up.

“Great job. You’re the best trainer in the Pokeworld,” Kelly breathed out. She didn’t seem like she meant it.

He ignored her. Now was the time to fulfill Ryan’s destiny. Now was the time for Ryan to get the starter he had always wanted. “Now, Pokeball, go and catch me my new ‘mon!”

The blue-haired trainer threw a ball towards the paralyzed Charmeleon as if he were an Olympic athlete. Yet the ball landed a good 15 feet in front of the fire lizard. Must’ve been the wind. Ryan scowled.

“Hey, you, get over here!” he hollered to the Charmeleon. The Pokemon just looked at him and let out a low growl, though his paralysis seemed to be holding him back. In but a moment, Ryan went from being a winner to a crestfallen little non-winner. How was he to get Charmeleon now? That cave was dark, hot, dangerous, scary. No way he could step in there. Then he spied Abra, his old friend; his true friend; his shield; his sword.

“Abra! Quickly, grab the Pokeball and throw it at Charmeleon!”

“Ra? Abra abra!” his future sweeper replied.

Ryan couldn’t blame him. It was unexpected. It was unprecedented. Abra would be the Pokemon to catch a Pokemon. He would be a trailblazer, a Pokemon amongst men. It would be like a pig eating bacon if pigs existed in the Pokemon universe. He would be a legend, born today.

“Just do it, buddy-o!”

“Bra.”

Abra used his psychic abilities to grab the fallen Pokeball and bring it over to his clawed hands. Then, he grasped the small ball and did a little ballerina twirl. “Abraaa ra!” he yelled, doing a double backflip as what seemed like fireworks were going off in the background. “Ra ra abra!” There was audible applause when he landed the difficult acrobatic maneuver, though from whom Ryan could not see.

He threw that ball, he did. He was Abra, king of the ‘mons. He slept all day. He could learn teleport. He was the greatest there ever was. The Pokeball traveled faster than the winds over to the red lizard and as it opened, Ryan saw Charmeleon try to fight against it. But he was paralyzed, so he couldn’t do anything. What a shame. Soon, a red light covered the Pokemon’s visage, and after a flash, he was safely in the ball. Abra picked it up, showed a peace sign to the camera and then scampered back to Ryan.

“Aw, Abra, you did it!” Ryan was jubilant. He was ecstatic. “You’re number one, buddy!” he patted Abra on the head. “And you’re number forty-seven for doubting me,” he sneered at Kelly.

She rolled her eyes and bit her lip.

After a short trip to the PokeCenter, Ryan and Kelly returned to the beach with the intent of training up their Pokemon for old Blaine the Bold. The sun was already beginning to set, but the air was still warm, smelling of salt and promise. Ryan was a bit anxious, for he only had one water Pokemon. Matata would be useless against Blaine’s fearsome guys. Abra and his Charmeleon wouldn’t be much better. So it was all up to Golduck. Ryan had briefly entertained the thought of purchasing a fishing rod, which looked like a rather old rod in truth, but he had not the Pokedollars to buy it. He needed his money for more important things, like twix bars. After all, food tasted better than catching Tentacools. Contrary to popular belief, they were not all that cool.

When the two reached the sand, they spied a host of people ahead. There were tents and umbrellas and loud music and beach balls and girls playing beach volleyball with naught but bikinis on. This was Ryan’s type of party. He nodded their way to Kelly, who looked more annoyed than ever. But she couldn’t really train her Wartortle without Ryan’s help, so she bit her lip and followed him into the din of partygoers. There were dozens of them – men, women, boys, girls, and Pokemon too. Ryan got excited at that and instantly let loose all of his Pokemon with the flick of his wrist. Matata, Abra, Clawey, and Charmeleon came fluttering out. He watched them for a moment, and he realized he still needed to give Charmeleon a nickname. Maybe after the party.

Ryan gave his ‘mon a few Pokedollars and told them not to waste them – for they would get no more from their fickle trainer – and then bade them off. He looked to his left and saw that Kelly was already sitting at a table and drinking from a pitcher of orange juice like a ravenous raver. So Ryan found himself alone and he started wandering through the beachgoers, searching for his own pitcher of orange juice. It was then that Ryan beheld a most glorious sight that made him stop in his tracks.

In the sand, there was a huge entity. Ryan knew what it was as soon as he saw its figure, even if he couldn’t see it properly because the sun was setting right behind it and silhouetting it. “A Snorlax…” he mumbled to himself excitedly. “Cool!” He reached for his Pokeballs when he realized all his trusty pals were out and roaming about. He had no one to catch snorrey with. “Curses!” he whispered just as a girl walked in front of him. She met his eyes and looked at him like he was a lunatic. He frowned and stared back at her. She didn’t know why he had yelled that. Stupid assumptive girl.

Without any Pokemon, Ryan was low on options. So he resolved to just throw a Pokeball at the Snorlax. It was sleeping, so maybe it couldn’t say no to the ball. Ryan jumped in the air, putting on a dramatic performance of moves and twirls in the sand. He instantly regretted his moves, for sand got all in his shoes. He shivered. He hated that. Still, Ryan had to clear his head and focus, for he was about to catch a Pokemon he’d always wanted.

“Go get a Snorlax!”

The ball flew forward and hit the Snorlax in the side of the belly, getting stuck in one of the rolls of fat. Ryan was perplexed. He lurched forward, his mouth agape. What had just happened? Why hadn’t the Pokeball opened?

“Are you serious?!” came a sudden booming, warm voice. Suddenly, the Snorlax stood up and Ryan saw that he was face-to-face with a human, not a Pokemon. “Really?” the former Snorlax said, his voice rich as honey with disbelief. He plucked the Pokeball out of his rolls of fat and handed it back to Ryan. “What were you trying to do, man?”

Ryan scratched the back of his head. “Uh, well…” he blushed. “I-I thought you were a Pokemon. Honest mistake, dude.”

“Are you serious?!” the guy repeated, this time rolling his head around like a turtle and looking this way and that at everyone watching the spectacle. He had a glimmer in his eye and an incredulous smile on his bronze face. And he tugged at his sweet-as-tauros goatee with a few fingers. It clothed his chin like bikinis clothe hot girls. It really was a spectacular goatee. Ryan felt a pang of jealousy. He wanted to be able to grow a goatee like fake Snorlax.“Do I look like a Pokemon?”

“Not anymore,” Ryan admitted.

“Ugh!” the other replied, throwing his arms up into the air. “I wonder which Pokemon you thought I was. There’s only one it could be.”

“No, it’s not like that,” Ryan assured the big man. “You… uh… you reminded me of Mr. Mime!”

“Sure,” the once-a-Snorlax replied sarcastically.

Ryan sighed. “Look man, I’m real sorry I threw a Pokeball at you. Can we just forget it?”

The other’s eyes suddenly shot up like a dog’s. “Deal.” He thrust out his dark hand to shake Ryan’s. With his other he produced a screwdriver-like device and raised it to the sky like it was a fine glass of wine. “I’m Doctor Rahul Kanojia!” he squealed out.

“Doctor… who?” Ryan asked, for he barely comprehended the outlandish name.

“Exactly!” Rahul replied. He patted Ryan on the back of his back. “Come on, let’s get you a drink.”

To say Ryan was confused would be like saying generation one was the best generation. He had barely heard this self-proclaimed doctor’s name; and the doctor hadn’t even asked for Ryan’s. Was he serious?

Rahul moved forward to a table, putting each arm around a girl in a bikini. He turned around and looked at Ryan, beaming. “Are you hungry?”

Before Ryan could respond, Rahul whistled. Within a moment, a breathless girl came flying onto the scene, a plate of hot wings held delicately in her hands.

“Here you go Rahul! Hope I was fast enough,” she said, handing him the plate.

Rahul laughed. It was not as hearty as Ryan had expected. He took a bite out of a hot wing, spilling its sauce all over his face. He didn’t even care, even though he wasn’t a honey badger. He gestured for Ryan to come forward and eat off his plate of hot wings. Ryan was just in awe of Rahul’s ability to whistle and summon hot wings out of nowhere. It was magic, truly. How could he learn to do that too?

Ryan sat with Rahul, learning about how great of a doctor he was and eating hot wings when suddenly, a flash of flames caught Ryan’s eyes. He turned his head just in time to see a roar of flames and sand go by him. It was so close that he felt the heat and said goodbye to his eyebrows. He blinked the sand out of his eyes just in time to see the flames go rushing by again. This time he saw what it was – a girl riding a Rapidash. Ryan audibly gulped. It was a beautiful, haunting sight. She was literally riding in her mount’s flames, but Ryan knew that was possible so long as the owner had the trust of the Rapidash. His father had a Rapidash too, and it was his prized Pokemon. Ryan had considered taking old Rappy instead of Abra when he set out on his journey, but he figured his father would miss his favorite Pokemon too much. He still sometimes thought about it, though he did not regret his choice in Abra, the truly loyal steed.

The girl riding the Rapidash was not much older than Ryan. She had blond hair and green eyes, and she was scantily clad. She looked like she was wet, as if she had just been spit out by the ocean. In each hand, she had a shot glass and she was doing shots of apple juice. Ryan admired her skill. Crowds of people had encircled her and now they were cheering as she rode the Rapidash around in skillful fashion. Ryan entertained the thought of running up to her and asking for a ride, but he quickly reminded himself that he was a part of society, and that was not something people in society do. So Ryan sat down, ate some more hot wings, and admired Rahul’s unrivaled goatee. He just wanted to tug on it like one tugs on grass.

As Ryan was sitting on a bench with Rahul and Rahul’s two token babes (whom Rahul, in all his physical Snorlax likeness had somehow managed to woo), he spotted his recently acquired Charmeleon. Pride swelled up in Ryan’s throat. He had caught that Pokemon all by himself. He was amazing; he was the best. He was a true Pokemon master.

“Hey Charmeleon, come here!” Ryan shouted. The Charmeleon looked at Ryan but did not move. Perhaps it didn’t hear him. So Ryan flailed his arms about as if he were having a seizure and flung himself into the sand like a fish out of water. Sure enough, the Pokemon understood that and trotted over.

“Charmeleon!” Ryan said, proudly. “I caught him today!”

Doctor Rahul took a bite out of a hot wing. He grunted in pleasure at its taste. Hot grease ran down his mouth into his goatee and he seemed like he loved it.

“Now let’s give you a nickname,” Ryan began, taking out his PokeDex. “All right, Dexy. I want to give Charmeleon a nickname.”

“This Charmeleon already has a nickname,” the Pokedex stated.

Rahul took another bite out of his hot wing. Grease and sauce splattered on his face. He smiled. He was happy. Perhaps eating hot wings was his natural state. And whenever anyone walked by, he would raise his left hand, which held the screwdriver-like device in it and wink at the passerby. It made him look homely and homeless at the same time.

“No way!” said Ryan. “He was a wild Pokemon. He couldn’t have a nickname. Lemme name him already!”

“This Charmeleon already has a nickname,” the Pokedex stated a second time.

“No! His name is supposed to be Aegon! Do you hear me, Dexy? Make his name Aegon! I command you!”

“This Charmeleon already has a nickname,” the Pokedex stated a third time.

Rahul sucked the succulent meat off of the bone of his little hot wing. He was surgical, precise, deliberate with every bite. This was not his first hot wing. He was a master in his own right, well learned and masterfully trained in the art of eating these little treats. Hot grease ran down his lips into his goatee. He smiled in pleasure. Hot wings did taste good.

Ryan was getting annoyed now. “How?! He’s wild!”

“This Charmeleon already has a nickname,” the Pokedex stated a fourth time.

“I know, I know!” Ryan shouted, banging his Pokedex on his thigh. “At least tell me what his nickname is!”

Rahul found another hot wing under the house of bones he had created with the ones he had already consumed. His little fingers started going real fast and his face lit up as if he had just won a million Pokedollars. He quickly grabbed the hot wing and took a voracious bite out of the cooked flesh. Hot grease ran down Rahul’s face into his goatee and he moaned out in pleasure of eating his food. The two girls in their bikinis just sat next to Rahul like statues, as if they couldn’t – nay, wouldn’t – see what was going on between them. Playing beach volleyball wouldn’t be nearly as fun as watching a Snorlax wannabe tear into hot wings without respite.

“Charmeleon’s nickname is ‘Get Over Here’,” Ryan’s Pokedex spoke in monotone.

“What?!?!” Ryan screamed so loud that everyone around stopped what they were doing to stare at him for exactly four seconds before returning to their personal activities. “How is that his nickname?”

“Dontcha ‘member,” a slurred voice spoke up from just behind Ryan’s ear. “Thass what you called ‘im when ya caught him,” Kelly nodded in a lethargic way. Her eyes were glazed and she was covered in sweat.

“Kelly?!” Ryan squinted his eyes. “What’s wrong with you?”

“Oh, nothin’… juss had a little too much orange juice!” she stated proudly before hiccupping. “You… you came up with a really great name for Charmey. Really great. I love it. I love you.”

“Okay, okay. That’s enough!” Ryan raised his arms and stood up. He pocketed his Pokedex and grabbed the pink-haired girl by the shoulders. “Kelly, I need to get you back to our tent. You’re really in no condition to stay here.”

She laughed and drank some more orange juice.

Ryan thrust his face into his palm. “Come on, let’s go!” He turned to Rahul. “And it was nice meeting you, Doctor Rahalakanijiwali.”

Rahul raised his screwdriver to the sky, hot grease pouring down his face into his goatee.

Ryan then helped the stumbling Kelly away. “Come on Charmeleon, let’s go home!”

“Meleon,” it replied in deadpan, crossing its wee arms.

Ryan scowled. “Fine. Come on, Get Over Here!”

The fire lizard barked and then ran on all fours over to his new master with happy vigor. Ryan sighed. At least he had a Charmeleon now. That was better than nothing.

Episode 8: Sweet
Ryan awoke to the sounds of distant music and cheering. He got up, stumbled out of his tent, furiously blinking his blurry eyes into clarity. Peering out of his tent flap, Ryan noticed the beach partying was still going on into the early morning. The sun was barely rising across the cool water, and still there was party music blaring out across the otherwise serene beach. Squinting, Ryan could see the far-off shapes of people dancing about and a flaming Rapidash galloping through the sand.

Ryan stole a look over to the tent next to his. There was no movement coming from within it. Maybe Kelly was sleeping. That would be good. The last thing he wanted was to have to deal with her in all her orange-juice-deprived glory. So Ryan slipped on a pair of sandals, grabbed his Pokeballs, and decided to visit Cinnabar Island’s town just for the heck of it. He soon found the town deserted, save for a drowsy-looking Drowzee who was stumbling about with a tin can of long-expired beans in its hand. Ryan passed the Pokemon and made his way to the town’s Poke Mart. Once inside, he let out all four of his super cool ‘mon and let them run around to their hearts’ content. They went screaming around the aisles, grabbing for candy bars and shiny objects and other cool gadgets. Ryan left them and strode up to the counter, where a burly, somnolent man manned the register.

Reaching the counter, Ryan noticed a poster hanging on the nearest wall. It had a picture of a boy slightly younger than him riding a Porygon. Below it was a bounty for two million woolongs. Ryan walked over to the paper and eyed it carefully.

“Who’s this?” he asked the cashier.

“Some kid. He’s been terrorizing the mainland with his fearsome team of Pokemon. If ya ever find him during your travels, defeat him in battle and then hand him over to any Officer Jenny for a big reward.”

“I’ll remember to do that when I return to Kanto. I’m a great trainer, so it shouldn’t be a problem,” Ryan replied. A few extra Pokedollars would be great for his pocket. He just wondered what the conversion rate from woolongs was.

“You wanna be the very best?” the cashier asked inquisitively.

The boy’s eyes sparkled like a shooting star. “Like no one ever was!”

The man’s own eyes narrowed, unconvinced. “To catch them is your real test, huh?”

“Well,” Ryan shrugged modestly,“to train them is my cause. Anyway, I need some new Pokefood for my buddies,” Ryan continued. “I caught a Charmeleon yesterday, so I need whatever he eats.”

The man grunted and pulled up some bags of food from behind the counter. One for Abra, one for Matata, one for Charmeleon. Ryan never bought Clawey any food because he liked to catch Magikarp in the ocean. As Ryan went to pay for the food, his Pokemon came running up to him, each with several items in their hands.

“Brah… abra ra! Abra!” Abra squeaked, brandishing two candy bars like swords in front of his master. Ryan chuckled and plucked them from Abra’s claws and added them to his purchases. Abra was wearing a pair of black, pointed sunglasses that he evidently wanted as well, and after thirteen minutes of pleading, Ryan finally agreed to buy them.

“Shieieieieieilaahahahahaha!!!!” Matata had her mouth full of candy, and Ryan quickly ripped the precious sweets from her teeth before she could tear through the wrappers.

“Duck duck duuuuck!!” Clawey was dancing around with a pair of maracas, which made Ryan wonder if the blue animal had taken a sip from the orange juice as well. Still, he put them on the counter for Ryan did not want to upset his most valuable Golduck.

“Meleon, char!” Get Over Here barked as he came sidling up wearing a top hat and sporting a fine antique monocle. Ryan was left in awe by the fact that the Poke Mart even carried such arcane merchandise. Begrudgingly, he added them to the pile. The noble trainer also grabbed a small bottle of advil for Kelly when she woke up. She’d owe him big for that. Real big.

“That’ll be 1300 Pokedollars,” the cashier said in his dreary voice after counting up all the things on the counter.

Ryan sighed and pulled out his wallet. Inside, he found exactly 1300 Pokedollars. “Oh come on!” he yelled to no one in particular. The cashier thrust out his hand, his fingers working the open space like he was tickling a Tauros’ tummy. “Okay, okay. Chill out man,” Ryan growled in annoyance. He handed the crisp Pokedollars to the cashier, gathered up his purchases, and then high-tailed it out of there. He was a penniless trainer. He was quite literally without pennies. Even one penny would be a great uptick in his wealth at this point.

Ryan returned to his camp and found Kelly sitting just outside her tent. He threw her the bottle of advil and a candy bar.

“Hey,” she said hoarsely. “Where were you?”

“At the Poke Mart.”

“Found anything good?” she asked, looking at Abra’s sunglasses, Get Over Here’s top hat, and Clawey’s maracas. She suddenly burst out laughing but then groaned and felt her head. She probably had a massive migraine after her escapades last night.

“Some stuff, I guess. And Kelly, you should take that advil right now. It’ll help with the hangover.”

Kelly went red. “I don’t have a hangover!”

Ryan shrugged. “Whatever. Advil and water’s what my dad used to take when he got hungover. Trust me, I know how to deal with this stuff.”

Kelly just gave him the stink eye. She was well-practiced in that maneuver.

“So I need to challenge Blaine now,” Ryan spoke. “After that last trip to the store, I’m dead broke.”

“But we aren’t done training Golduck and Wartortle!” Kelly objected.

“So? They’re water Pokemon. They should win. Besides, they’ve already been through a lot of training together. I’m sure they’re way stronger than before.”

“We only have one water Pokemon apiece, Ryan. Blaine uses three fire Pokemon in his Gym Battles.”

Ryan scratched the back of his head. “Well, how badly did you lose when you fought him last time?”

“I took out his Ninetails and Rapidash, but his Arcanine defeated me.”

“Well, then use your other Pokemon too.”

“He had already taken out ‘Aichu and Fluffy,” Kelly admitted. “Tortilla was the only one who managed to do some serious damage.”

“Who are those ones again?” Ryan asked, puzzled. How could he possibly be bothered to know what Kelly’s nicknames for her Pokemon were?

“Raichu and Arcanine, of course. My Wartortle is my only chance, Ryan. If he’s not strong enough…” Kelly trailed off, looking out over the cool ocean. “Maybe I could catch another one.”

“Yeah, you go do that. That’ll be great! I believe in you!” Ryan shouted, punching his fist into the air. Once he finished, he supposed that he had overreacted a bit. Who knows, though.

“You aren’t going to listen to me, are you? You’re going to challenge Blaine no matter what I say?”

Ryan screwed up his face. He had to look like a hero. He was born to be a hero, not to mention a winner. He had to act like it. “Yeah! Just after this candy bar!” His face softened. “Look, Kelly. I need the badge of course, but the money’s even more important right now. Unless you want to fish Tentacool out of the ocean, we’ll need money to buy more food. These candy bars won’t last forever. ”

Kelly couldn’t argue with Ryan’s statement because Ryan was a master debater and she was just Kelly. So Ryan, happy with his verbal victory, took a fierce victory bite out of the nearest candy bar (getting his daily dose of sweet, sweet chocolate) as he looked off into the distance. He saw the partyers still going at it, but he didn’t see the Rapidash anymore. Rapidash. He wondered if that beast belonged to Blaine. If that was the case, then who was that pretty girl riding it?

Ryan found a long list of trainers outside of the Cinnabar Island gym. Most of them were looking pretty depressed, as if they had just eaten a ghost pepper for the third time in their lives. A good deal of them were missing their eyebrows, and their faces were lined with light burn and soot marks. Ryan was sure that was from either the pepper or the gym, but he wasn’t sure which one.

Just outside the door was a familiar face - Doctor Rahul Kanalanapia. The bronze-skinned dude was basking in the sunlight and eating a plate of barbecue ribs. The sauce was all over his mouth and cheeks and neck and hot grease was running down his finely-combed beard. Even as his stomach growled in protest, Ryan smiled. Rahul was so cool. What a guy.

“Hey Rahul,” Ryan said, waving towards the behemoth of a trainer with one of Clawey’s maracas’ in each hand. Assuredly, Ryan was sporting the attire all of his Pokemon had picked out earlier, so the regal top hat, monocle, and sharp black sunglasses, supported by the maracas and his regular clothes was clearly a queer sight indeed. Ryan thought it looked great, though; just great. He hadn’t had a sip of the orange juice, no sir. He was going to impress Blaine with his swag. He would get that old man to holla holla.

“Oh hey… Ryan, right?” Rahul croaked, barely looking up at the boy or noticing his pristine appearance.

“You remembered! Great job!” Ryan said, giving Rahul two thumbs up. “Did you beat Blaine yet?”

“Blaine? No no no. I beat Olivia,” Rahul corrected Ryan with a barbecue-plagued finger. “She really wasn’t that hard, y’know?”

Ryan was as confused as a Ponyta on a treadmill. “Oh, I thought Blaine was the Fire Pokemon master…”

“Well, you thought wrong,” Rahul said before taking a deep bite out of one of his ribs. He grunted softly to himself in deep pleasure after tasting the sweet meat. Ryan couldn’t stop his mouth from watering. Curse living on candy bars!

“Okay, well I’ll be back out in a little bit. I need to defeat this Gym Leader first. I hafta get the Volcano Badge!” Ryan shook the maracas violently over his head to get his point across. He desperately needed the badge to get into the Indigo League Tournament like his father before him. He had to make his family proud. That way his mother wouldn’t see him as a disappointment, a high school dropout with no future, and his father wouldn’t see him as tarnishing his own legacy. Ryan would win the tournament for them. He had to.

“Sure,” Rahul said, waving a half-chewed rib in Ryan’s general vicinity. “I’ll be here when you get back.”

“Save me a rib!” Ryan pleaded earnestly.

“No promises,” replied Rahul.

Ryan nodded and then ran off to the gym entrance. He had to defeat this Olivia girl fast… if he wanted to get one of those ribs before Rahul devoured them all. Rahul smiled broadly, bobbing his head up and down like an apple in water and gestured for Ryan to enter the door to his right. Ryan saw that it was, unmistakably, the gym entrance. He nodded to Rahul, felt his heart pounding in his chest, took a deep breath, and then stepped inside.

Inside, Ryan found himself hit by a wall of heat. The lights were dimmed, and he had to move by feeling his way, rather than seeing properly. The room was cluttered with chairs and tables and what appeared to be statues of people. As he neared them, however, they moved slightly, but he never got in their lines of sight, so they just stood still. That was quite weird, but Ryan didn’t know what to do about it. His immediate thought was to throw a Pokeball at one of them, but his encounter with Rahul the night before had already tackled that joke well enough.

As he walked past one of the statues, Ryan caught a glimpse of its face and saw it to be human. He let out an audible gasp and nearly fell over in surprise. The human - a boy slightly younger than Ryan himself - took this cue as his moment to jump forward and challenge Ryan to a duel.

“Pokemon battle, begin!” the boy screamed, waving a Pokeball over his head like a madchild. “I’m Super Nerd!” he shouted proudly. “If you want to fight Gym Leader Olivia, then you’ll have to get past me first!”

Ryan frowned. “Uh, I’m not here to battle you. I just want a Volcano Badge.”

Super Nerd started foaming at the mouth and dancing to a song Ryan could not hear, frantically poking the air all around him as if he was in some kind of frenzy. “Fight me! Come on! Fiiiiiight meeee!!!”

“Um, no thanks,” replied Ryan, stepping forward and pushing Super Nerd out of the way with his hand. Maybe he has rabies, Ryan thought.

Super Nerd fell to the ground with the frailty of a piece of paper in the wind. “Bu-but…” he stammered. “No fair! You have to fight me.”

But Ryan was already gone. He wasn’t in the gym to fight some weird little nerd statue dude. He couldn’t afford to have even one of his Pokemon injured in battle before facing Olivia. He wasn’t even sure if his existing team was good enough as it was. He felt anxious at that, his heart beating so hard that he could hear it in his ears with every step. So Ryan started shaking the maracas as he walked to drown out the cursed noise.

After some time, Ryan slogged his way into a large cavern, where stalactites and stalagmites grew from the rocky surfaces like gnarled teeth. He supposed that he was in the heart of the town’s volcano now. His entire body was slicked with sweat. There ahead of him, situated over a pool of molten lava, was a medium-sized battle platform. It hung from the ceiling with rusty chains and swayed slightly with every earthly volcanic rumble. As he started moving forward, Ryan caught a glimpse of flame, instantly sending him into déjà vu. Blinking sweat out of his eyes, Ryan saw the Rapidash and the girl who rode it so well come flying into view.

“Whoa there!” the girl shouted. She was wearing blue short shorts, a small red crop top which revealed much of her flat stomach, flip-flops, and a light blue bandana around her forehead. She was very pretty, Ryan realized, and he barely heard what she said next because of that. “What do you want?!”

Ryan shook his head to clear his thoughts. “A-are you Olivia?”

She studied Ryan’s face and then dismounted. “Sure am. So are you here for a Volcano Badge?” She reached for something in her pocket, then produced a small red button that looked like a flame. She held it between two long fingers as she thrust it into Ryan’s face. It glimmered red in the flames of the Rapidash. “One of these?”

“Yes please!”

She let out a sly smile. “You’ll have to battle me for it. My father entrusted me to run this Gym properly, and I’ll do it! You’ll have to earn this badge!”

“Your father’s Blaine?”

“Yeah, he’s sick right now, so I took over gym battle duties. I’m not as experienced as him, but you shouldn’t underestimate me.”

“I won’t,” Ryan promised the girl a promise he knew he could keep.

“Good!” Olivia beamed, flicking her golden hair out of her eyes. “Three-on-three, okay? No gimmicks, no surprises. Whoever has the most Pokemon left standing at the end wins, got it?”

“Yeah.”

“Then, let’s party!” Olivia shouted. In one fluid motion, she jumped on her Rapidash with grace and then led him across the hanging platform to the other side. Once there, she stayed mounted on her Rapidash even as she readied a Pokeball in her hand. Ryan did likewise. “Ready?!” she shouted his way.

“Ready!” he echoed back.

Ryan took a deep breath, swallowing his fear and anxiety. The time for all of that was done. Now, he just needed to fight, to prove himself. He needed to show everyone that he was a Pokemon master after all. He grabbed a Pokeball off of his belt and held it in his hand. The volcano rumbled then, and splashes of lava flew into the air all around him. Yet Ryan was not scared by the lethal hot liquid shooting up in geysers around where he stood. He felt the anxiety roll off of him with the heat and the sweat. He was ready now. He was ready to win. So the boy took the Pokeball and threw it directly at the hanging platform ahead of him, starting his most important match yet.

Episode 9: Cinnaburn
“Go Ninetales!”

“Go Clawey!”

Ninetales was a beautiful Pokemon, Ryan thought, and it towered over his poor Golduck like VY Canis Majoris compared to a lonely hydrogen atom. He had only ever seen Ninetales on television before, and now seeing one in person, in all its glory, Ryan was colored very impressed.

“Confuse Ray!” Olivia commanded.

Ryan tipped his top hat Olivia’s way before beginning, because he was a gentleman and a scholar. “Clawey, use surf!”

Before Clawey could ride that wave, however, the Ninetales shot forward and fired a Confuse Ray. Ryan desperately wanted Clawey to avoid it, but alas, his Pokemon had not the speed, and the attack hit him straight in the chest. Clawey fell over. Ryan took out his Pokedex and pointed it at Clawey. His Golduck had stood up by this point and was now looking this way and that, visible question marks popping up around its beak. Ryan had never seen such a thing happen before. Heck, he hadn’t even believed it was possible for question marks to materialize out of nowhere until just then.

“Clawey is confused!” Dex droned.

“Oh no! Oh jeez!” Ryan was horrified. He saw his chances slipping. “Come on Clawey, surf all over that Ninetales! Don’t hurt yourself in your confusion! Please!”

“Duck, gol? Gol, duck?” Clawey quacked. He then brought up his surf around him and rode an impressive wave right into Ninetales. It was a direct hit. Ninetales stumbled back, shrieking in pain. Its fur soaked and its body bruised, the fire Pokemon then collapsed onto the ground, defeated.

“Whooooo!” Ryan whooped, punching the air.

Olivia returned Ninetales, then dismounted from her Rapidash. “All right, Rapidash, it’s time we teach this kid a lesson! Go get ‘em!”

Rapidash lept through the air impressively and landed right in front of the question mark-plagued Golduck.

“Rapidash, Take Down!”

“Body Slam it, Clawey!” Ryan yelled.

The Rapidash glided forward as if it was flying and tackled the small Golduck easily, even as it was slightly damaged by the recoil of the attack. Ryan winced as he watched his Golduck hit the floor hard. Bruises and scratches were clearly evident on its body now. Clawey winced and cried out, but it stood up to retaliate with a Body Slam. However, as he tried to, the Golduck accidentally punched himself in the face with a hard fist and fell over again.

“Clawey has hurt itself in its confusion!” Dex assured its master.

Ryan shook his head and slumped his shoulders. “That’s exactly what I didn’t want to happen!”

“All right, another Take Down, Rapidash! Don’t let up!”

“Oh brother…” Ryan breathed out as he watched the entire scenario play itself out again. The fire stallion charged his Golduck, hit it to the floor and hurt itself slightly in the recoil. Once again, Golduck was hurt lots. This next time, Ryan told the blue Pokeduck to use his surf attack. The Golduck obliged and hit the Rapidash with a swift water attack. A flicker of hope caught Ryan then, for he saw how critically the attack had hurt Olivia’s Pokemon. The Rapidash shuddered and stumbled back.

“Don’t give up, Rapidash!” Olivia said, trying to console her fire ‘mon.

Ryan didn’t even hear the attack she told him to perform, though, for he was already yelling to Golduck again. “Rock it out with surf again! Make it rain, Clawey!” Ryan screamed, shaking his maracas as if to appease the rain gods. “Make it raiiiiiiiiin!!”

The Golduck took that command to heart and ran at the Rapidash. It started galloping right at Clawey, closing in on another fearsome attack. However, as the Rapidash got up to him, Clawey jumped out of the way, and his opponent went flying by, preparing a deadly Fire Spin for but an open space. Clawey flipped over in midair (because he was an acrobat with many years of training in the Pokemon gymnastics league), created a water wave and rode it upside down right into Rapidash’s left side. The Rapidash didn’t even know what hit it before it collapsed to the ground, defeated.

Olivia looked visibly frustrated with that defeat. Ryan laughed aloud. She seemed even more annoyed by his gloating than her own failure to outsmart him so he tipped his hat to her again. She must not have seen the gentleman’s gesture when she spoke, “You’re not half-bad, but this is the end of the road! You won’t win this time! I’ll show you who’s boss! Go Flareon!”

“Flareon?” Ryan repeated, puzzled. “I thought Blaine’s other Pokemon was an Arcanine.”

“That was my father’s Pokemon. Flareon’s mine. And you’ll see, he’s a lot more deadly, too.”

“We’ll see alright,” Ryan swore. “Clawey, use your Body Slam attack!”

“Flareon, Body Slam him right back!”

The two Pokemon flew into the air like a couple of drunk Pidgeys trying to mate and soon they collided with a sickening thud. Ryan winced as he saw a bright white light encapsulate the two Pokemon; then, their two bodies fell from the air like sacks of potatoes and crashed into the ground. The great metal chains holding up the platform shook violently for a few moments, and a few splashes of lava jumped onto the side nearest Ryan. He saw that Golduck was lying crumpled on the ground, not moving. He quickly pointed his PokeDex to Clawey and shouted:

“Hey, Clawey, get up! Come on, you can do it! You can beat Flareon!”

“Clawey has fainted,” Dex droned softly.

Ryan grasped onto his blue hair and briefly contemplated pulling it all out. “Gahhh! Come on, Clawey, don’t do this to me! Not now! We’re so close!” He knew how close he was. A single surf would cause Flareon to faint. He just needed Clawey to do one more attack.

“Looks like your Pokemon’s finished,” Olivia laughed. “Let’s go, bring out the next one. I don’t have all day, kid.”

“I’m not a kid… I’m fourteen! I’m a man grown.” Ryan mumbled to himself. After a brief stare-off with Olivia, he sighed and called his Golduck back into a Pokeball. He considered who to bring out next. Abra would get KO’d with one Body Slam, he knew. There was no way his Charmeleon would be any good, either. And Matata… she was a bug Pokemon - not even worth considering. He fingered Abra’s Pokeball and prepared to throw it onto the platform ahead of him when suddenly a commotion started up behind him. Ryan spun around to see Nurse Joy chasing after a Pokemon which was coming right at him like a train without brakes.

Dragonair. Ryan stepped back, his heart aflutter in his throat. The Dragonair slid right up to him and and nuzzled up against his neck. He just stood there, arms out to either side, unsure of what to do. Heck, he didn’t even know if what he was seeing was real. Could he be dreaming? Had the heat and hunger finally gotten to him?

“I’m sorry… so sorry!” Nurse Joy panted as she finally reached Ryan. Ryan could have sworn that she was even more beautiful than the last Nurse Joy he had seen. She had just the right shade of pink in her hair. “That Dragonair escaped from the Pokecenter. I’ve been trying to chase he down all afternoon!” When she saw how affectionate the Dragonair was acting to Ryan, she narrowed her eyes. “Hey, I know you! You’re the one who brought that Dragonair in!”

“Y-yeah, that’s me…” Ryan said, trailing off as he turned around to glance over at Olivia standing on the far side of the volcano. “Uh, I’m in the middle of a Pokebattle right now…”

“Oh, I’m dreadfully sorry!” Nurse Joy said politely. “This wasn’t your Pokemon, right?”

“No,” Ryan spoke honestly. “I just found it hurt in the woods, so I brought it to you.”

“Well, I guess we can keep her at the Pokecenter until her master comes to claim her. Here, let me put the Dragonair back in this Pokeball…”

“Neeee!!” The Dragonair shrieked. She pushed her body against Ryan’s, trembling tremendously.

“What’s that?” Nurse Joy cocked her head to one side. “She’s scared? She must not want to go in the ball.”

Ryan shook his head. Why did this have to happen now of all times? He knelt down next to the Dragonair, who was bobbing up and down, her entire body shaking in fright. She had moved behind Ryan as far away from the good nurse as physically possible. He pet her on the head to calm her down and spoke, “Hey, don’t worry, Dragonair! It’s just a Pokeball. Besides, once your master finds out you’re here, they’ll come and get you!”

“Nee eehh ne!” Dragonair growled. Ryan tried to move her around him for Nurse Joy to take, but the Dragonair would not budge. Her eyes were as wide as something that is wide and she seemed to be pleading with Ryan. He faltered, seeing her like that.

“I… I think she wants to stay with me…” He thought back to how standoffish the Dragonair had been back when he had found her and saved her from the clutches of that insane bratty girl, Sophia. And now it was as loyal to him as any of his stalwart companions. Ryan looked up at Nurse Joy, bewildered by his realization.

She nodded, knowingly. “It seems that Dragonair knows you saved her. And now she only feels safe around you.”

“But what about her original master? Won’t they be mad? I can’t just steal their Pokemon!”

“Her original master must have abandoned her. You said she was all alone and wounded in the forest. No good Pokemon Trainer would ever leave one of their Pokemon like that. That must’ve been when Dragonair broke out of the Pokecenter! She wanted to make sure that you didn’t forget her too.”

Ryan looked down at the Dragonair, his mouth agape. He couldn’t believe it. “So… I can take her?”

Nurse Joy did that thing that they do in the Pokemon anime where they just grunt and nod and Ryan knew what it meant because he lived in the Pokemon world.

Ryan turned back to the Dragonair and patted it on the head. “Hey Dragonair! So you wanna stay with me, huh?” Dragonair barked and bobbed its head enthusiastically. Ryan beamed. “Alright! Welcome to Team Ryan, the best team in the Pokeworld! Whoo!” He looked back to Nurse Joy and gave her a thumbs up. “Thanks for helping me with this, but I’ve got a gym battle to win!”

Nurse Joy said her farewells and wished Ryan luck, but Ryan knew he had already gotten lucky. He’d gotten a Dragonair.

“Hey, what’s going on over there?!” Olivia shouted from the other side of the volcano.

“I’m just choosing my next Pokemon.”

“Well hurry up!”

Ryan ignored her and took out his PokeDex, thrusting it into his new Pokemon’s face impatiently. “Hey Dexy, does Dragonair know any water-type moves?”

“This Dragonair knows Surf. And please do not call me Dexy,” his PokeDex replied.

Ryan’s face lit up. “Awesome! I’m gonna wreck house with this Dragonair! We’re gonna party like it’s 1998! Thanks Dexy!” Ryan pocketed his irritable machine and then pointed to the stage. “Go Dragonair! Let’s bring the heat! Beat that Flareon!” He shook his maracas menacingly at Olivia, but she was probably too far away to hear them.

“Flareon, Body Slam it!” Olivia shouted as soon as the dragon-type Pokemon entered the stage. The Flareon howled and rushed forward, but as it reached Ryan’s Pokemon, it suddenly dropped to the ground, not moving. Flashes of electricity flew over its head, Ryan swore. “Oh no, she’s paralyzed!” Olivia moaned, disappointed.

“Paralyzed?” Ryan repeated, briefly confused. Then he remembered his Golduck’s last attack. “Oh! Clawey’s Body Slam must’ve done it! Holla at my boy!” Ryan took out Golduck’s Pokeball and jiggled it up and down to holler at his so called boy. “All right, let’s finish this! Dragonair, Surf your way to victory!”

The Dragonair nodded and conjured up a wave of water. And she surfed that wave so beautifully, it would have brought a tear to Ryan’s eye had he been a sad sappy sucker. Within a few moments, the entire hanging platform was sopping wet and the paralyzed Flareon had fainted. Olivia frowned and returned the Pokemon into its Pokeball; then, she jumped forward onto the precariously hanging battle platform and gestured for Ryan to join her. The boy scrambled forward to meet her.

Olivia was smirking when he reached her. When he came up to her, Ryan really saw how cute she was. Her wavy blond hair was hanging around her shoulders and skin color was the perfect island tan. As he stepped forward, the good trainer caught the scent of her perfume and briefly was he enthralled by her presence. When she used her hand to motion him forward, he lunged as if he was in a stupor and attempted to kiss her. The Gym Leader, however stepped back.

“Whoa, I’m just giving you your Volcano Badge, dude. No need to take it further than that…” she laughed nervously.

“Oh, right, thanks!” Ryan said, his face going scarlet as he plucked the shiny badge from the girl’s outstretched hand.

Ryan knew Olivia was trying to alleviate the embarrassment hanging in the air when she next spoke. “You fought well today, kid.”

''I’m not a kid. I’m basically a grownup'', Ryan thought. Can’t you see that?!

“You kind of lucked out with paralyzing my Flareon, but I guess everyone gets lucky sometimes, huh?”

And if I didn’t have Dragonair…

“Keep training your Pokemon, and learn more about Pokemon strategy. Who knows, maybe I’ll hear about you winning the Indigo League some day! Just keep fighting confident and stay humble. That’s a big part of winning a battle. Don’t let your opponents outsmart you.”

“Thanks,” Ryan replied meekly, his shoulders thrust forward and his head down. “You’re a good trainer too.”

He wanted to tell her she was pretty. He wanted to let out all of his feelings; but, like the volcano bubbling underneath their feet, he didn’t allow any outburst. He held his tongue. Ryan had made a fool of himself once already today, and he was not keen on making a second. So the boy said his goodbyes to Olivia, turned around, and walked out of the Gym. He would return to Kelly and show her what he had won while she slept off a mighty orange juice hangover. He would gloat and boast, but deep down inside, Ryan would not forget Olivia. He only wished that once he won the Indigo League, like he knew he would, he could return to her and things would be different.

Episode 10: The Christmas Special!
When dear Kelly fought Olivia, the eye-pleasing lady girl, Ryan watched with a bag of popcorn and a heart full of confetti. He busted out his prized ukulele and sat on a fold-up chair to watch the battle. ‘Take the shot!’ he would scream to Kelly’s Wartortle (the esteemed Tortilla) as it did the battling. It was a water Pokemon so it was pretty good against Olivia’s fire ‘mon. Ryan gave his pointy sunglasses to Kelly’s Wartortle because Ryan watched season 1 of Pokemon and he knew that was what Wartortles needed to be winners.

Suffice to say, with the strength of her Wartortle, Arcanine, and Raichu, Kelly was able to scrape by Olivia’s team with the skin of her teeth. When she won, Ryan stood up and clapped as loudly as he could with a tear in his eye. He was so proud of that girl. Funnily enough, she didn’t even realize he was there until she turned to walk out.

“Oh hey,” Kelly said. “Came to watch the battle?”

“You did great! Yeah, girl, whoo!!” Ryan strummed on his ukulele. “I guess we can go to the next gym now, right?”

Kelly nodded. “Yeah. My last badge is in Viridian City. It’s the toughest gym out there. I’ll need to train my Pokemon some more before attempting it.”

“Huh?!?!? One more badge?!” Ryan cocked his head in surprise, then threw Abra’s Pokeball to the floor. The little Pokemon tumbled out, half-asleep, bless his heart. “Hey Abra, did you know about this one more badge thing?!”

“Bra bra bra abra!” Abra yawned.

“Dang, I can’t understand you at all.” Ryan returned his Pokemon to the Pokeball. “This isn’t fair,” he whined to Kelly. “I still have five badges to get! You can’t finish before me! That’s not fair.”

“Why not?”

“Be-because…” Ryan searched for the words, but could not say them. He wanted Kelly to come with him on his entire journey. He knew that once she got all eight gym badges, she’d leave him in the dust. She would go off to prepare for the tournament. He didn’t want that. He wanted her company. He needed it. Ryan’s face went red with embarrassment. “It’s… it’s nothing, okay!”

Kelly smiled, deviously. “Sure, okay. Whatever you say. So we’ll take a boat to Pallet Town and then travel to Viridian City from there, okay?”

“Pallet Town?!” Ryan’s face suddenly lit up. “You mean where Professor Oak lives?”

“Yeah, why?”

Ryan punched the sky. “He can change Charmeleon’s name to something better!”

“Are you sure about that?” Kelly asked. Her face betrayed her doubt.

“No, not really. But let’s try it, okay?”

Kelly shrugged and then the two of them walked out of there, each with a new badge and a new goal.

Rahul was sunbathing on the beach when they found him. It had snowed the night before, and much of the beach was icy and slushy, but Rahul didn’t seem to mind. He was enjoying kabobs dripping with barbecue sauce that made Ryan as jealous as as a meerkat that wanted to merely be a cat. Around him, three bikini-clad girls were fanning Rahul and keeping him cool on that frosty day. By the time Ryan and Kelly reached Rahul, he had finished his meal and was licking his fingers ravenously.

“Aw no fair, Rahul!” Ryan shouted. He almost brought out the maracas again. “You were supposed to save me some.”

“Sorry,” Rahul smiled unapologetically. “You took too long.”

“Ugh! Well, do you want to come with us? Kelly and I are leaving the island to get more badges.”

“Come on, this place is awesome!” Rahul squealed like a pig in heat. “Do we have to leave?”

“Rahul…” Ryan said in a motherly tone. “You know you have to earn more badges to get into the Indigo Tournament. How many do you have so far?”

Rahul sighed. “Three.”

“Cool, me too! Let’s get some more, okay? All right, buddy?” Ryan patted the big man on the shoulder and was struck by how he had to treat Rahul like a Pokemon to make Rahul do anything.

Rahul looked at Ryan. “I want go south to catch Lugia first."

The blue-haired boy shook his head. "No, no, no! It’s too early in the story for legendaries, brah. Besides, I don’t know if you’re an important enough character to get one anyway."

Rahul sighed again and raised a hand. “Okay, okay. Fine.” He sat up and and looked at the girls fanning him. “Before I go, do any of you want to be my girlfriend?”

The three beauties looked at one another and then, in unison, ran for the sandy-and-snowy hills faster than Sonic on Adderall.

The boat was sparsely populated, as most people were coming to the Cinnabar Island to battle Olivia, and those who had already beaten her had already left and returned home for Christmas. Only Ryan, Kelly, Rahul, and a small boy who called himself Dean accompanied the ship’s captain on the trip back to the mainland. Dean said almost nothing to the other three, instead focusing on his phone and talking to someone over Skype in a hushed voice. They didn’t bother him. Ryan let all of his Pokemon stretch their legs on the deck, as did Kelly and Doctor Rahul. Ryan was shocked to see how many cool Pokemon Rahul had - a Dragonair, a Charizard, a Lapras, a Hypno, a Rhyhorn, and a Magneton. Ryan stroked his non-existent goatee and hoped that one day he could be as cool as Rahul.

“I’m on a boat! Everybody look at me!” Ryan said in jubilation because he thought that awesome people like Rahul would say something like that.

All of the Pokemon partied like it was 1998, playing pin the tail on the Tauros and sipping on fine bubbly juice. Ryan conversed with the others about what they expected to get from Poke Santa for Christmas. However, as Ryan glanced over at his Pokemon, he noticed that his Golduck was getting seasick. Clawey’s eyes got swirly like pastries and made Ryan hungry for said pastries. He was in awe of how a water Pokemon could get seasick in the first place. So Ryan brought Golduck over to him and comforted his poor Pokemon by telling him the story of the ugly barnacle.

As everyone was enjoying themselves, a second ship suddenly appeared on the horizon. It shot toward them with all its speed, and the captain could not avoid it. With a sudden “crash!” the two ships collided and water started flooding the deck.

“Avast ye mateys!” a voice from the other ship bellowed. Suddenly a dark shape sprung from other ship and jumped onto the deck of the sinking one. He was a pirate, attired in a proper pirate garb, and he had a flowing pink beard growing from his nose hairs. Both of his legs were peglegs and both of his hands were hooks. It made Ryan curious as to how Pinkbeard could even function in life. “The name’s Pinkbeard, yarrrgh! Pinkbeard the first!”

“Cool name bro,” Ryan said.

“Aye, it is, it is!” The pirate agreed. “Now give me all yer Pokemon yarrgh!”

“What?!” everyone shouted together. “Never!”

“Har har har, ya poor fools. No one gets away from Pinkbeard the first!” Pinkbeard raised his left hook, removed the hook with his other hand, and then began shooting nets out from the hole. They wrapped around each of the trio’s Pokemon and bound them tightly. “Made from special string! No Pokemon can escape from inside, yarrgh!” Pinkbeard proclaimed proudly.

“Oh no!” Kelly shouted. “What can we do?”

Rahul raised his screwdriver to the sky. “I’m the doctor. I can fix this!”

“Rahul, did you drink too much orange juice?! You can’t do anything with a plastic screwdriver!”

Ryan went to pat Rahul on the arm when Rahul jumped forward and charged Pinkbeard. “No! Don’t touch me, I’m sterile!”

Pinkbeard tripped Rahul with a well-placed pegleg, sending the human Snorlax flying into the side of the ship. He got the pastry eyes like Golduck had had a few minutes before and then fell over, unconscious.

“No more tricks, me mateys! Stand back and ya won’t get hurt!” The pirate scalawag moved forward to collect the Pokemon.

“Hey bozo, what do you think you’re doing?!” The small boy Dean said. He stood up and walked forward, unhooking a Pokeball from his waist.

“Ahar har har! I didn’t see ya, boy! Good, more Pokemon for me!” Pinkbeard aimed his hook at Dean.

Dean threw his Pokeball and out flopped a Magikarp. Ryan facepalmed. “That is literally the worst Pokemon you could have chosen to help us!” Ryan screamed in dismay.

Dean narrowed his eyes and smiled. “Just watch.” He pointed to Pinkbeard and then pressed a button on a bracelet on his left wrist. A bright light coated the Magikarp for a moment, and when it dissolved, it was not Magikarp who stood there any longer. “Use Mega Splash attack!” Dean roared.

Ryan took out his Pokedex and pointed it at the new Pokemon. It looked vaguely like a Magikarp, though it had wings and antennae and lightning coated its body like it was a Super Saiyan 2. Its body was muscled, longer, bigger, but it was not a Gyarados. It was a beast.

“Mega Magikarp,” Dex stated in monotone. “The Mega evolution of Magikarp. It is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I cry every time.”

“Huh? Mega? What’s a Mega?” Ryan pondered.

“It’s canon now,” Dean assured him.

Mega Magikarp glided through the air like an angel, gracefully maneuvering around the nets Pinkbeard was shooting at it. When it reached the old salty man, it opened its fishy mouth and sprayed Pinkbeard with a bunch of water. This got Pinkbeard pretty wet and pretty annoyed.

“So that’s how we’re gonna play, is it?! Okay, Tentacruel, Primeape, go!” He threw two Pokeballs. A Tentacruel and a Primeape came flying out of them.

They charged the Mega Magikarp, who flew past them like a dust cloud in a breeze. The Primeape spun around and flew at the Mega Magikarp with a flying kick, and the Tentacruel tried a water gun, but both were hopelessly hopeless attacks. The Primeape hit the Magikarp and banged his foot up real good, falling to the ground and screaming out in pain. The Tentacruel’s attack just bounced off the Magikarp’s hard shell.

“Tackle them!” Dean commanded. “Take them out!”

Mega Magikarp flopped forward and hit Pinkbeard across the face. This was quite the fish sneak attack and the pirate was unprepared for it. The tackle hit him square in the jaw, upending him, and sending him flying off into the distance. Everyone watched him go until he was nothing more than a twinkle in the sky. It was a beautiful sight.

“Yarrgh! Pinkbeard be blastin’ off again!” the pirate croaked as he flew away.

Mega Magikarp followed this up by tackling both of the pirate’s Pokemon. They went flying up the air after their master, soon disappearing from sight as they faded into the dark sky.

“See you later, bozo,” Dean screamed after Pinkbeard the First, who surely could not hear the boy. “You’ll never take me alive, coppers!”

Then, Dean commanded his Mega Magikarp to free the other Pokemon. Once they were free, the water Pokemon (Wartortle, Golduck, Mega Magikarp, Lapras, and the two Dragonairs) jumped in the water and used all of their strength to push their sinking boat to shore. Everyone worked together except for the Pokemon who didn’t, and eventually they towed the ship to shore. Great job, everyone!

It was evening by the time they reached the shore and it was just starting to snow again. Dean agreed to join the three in Pallet Town for the night, for it was too late for him to make his way home on his own. As they walked the beaches toward the city lights they could see in the distance, Ryan stumbled over something and fell to the sand. Rahul cackle and patted his belly seeing Ryan fall. Seeing Ryan fall gave him almost as much pleasure as a chicken wing would.

“What was that?” Ryan said, annoyed. He looked over to the thing he had tripped on and saw that it looked like a rock. But it was no rock, for the thing opened and Ryan could see something dark and slimy inside it. “Hey everyone! I found a rock with a snot in it! Whoa!”

“That’s not a rock, dummy,” Dean said, walking over to Ryan. “It’s a Cloyster.”

“How do you know? You’re not a Pokedex,” Ryan contended.

Dean shrugged. “I have a Shellder… I know what its evolution looks like.”

Ryan took out his Pokedex just to be sure. “Hey there, you Dexy thing you. What Pokemon is this?”

“Please do not call me a Dexy thing. It makes me feel weird,” Dex said in monotone. “Ahem… Cloyster, the Bivalve Pokémon. For protection, it uses its harder-than-diamonds shell. It also shoots spikes from the shell.”

Ryan’s eyes lit up. “Cool! I wanna catch it!” He took a Pokeball out of his bag and threw it to the ground. “Abra, I choose you!”

“Ra bra!”

“Reflect, Abra!”

Abra conjured up some sparkly energy around him and raised his defense against all possible physical attacks. The Cloyster noticed the bright light, realized it was under attack, and threw itself at Abra. Its rocky jaws shut around Abra’s frail body and clamped down hard.

“Abra, psychic yeah!”

But the Cloyster was still clamping down on Abra. The poor psychic Pokemon was suffering quite a bit. “Bra…. Abra…!” it moaned in pain as the Cloyster toyed with it.

“Hold on Abra!” Ryan said, taking another Pokeball out of his bag.

“Come on, Ryan, can’t you battle fair for once?!” Kelly complained. “Just once?”

“But Abra’s stuck!”

“If you’re a good enough trainer, you’ll think a way out of it.”

Ryan pocketed the ball begrudgingly. “Fine. If you say so. Abra, use psychic as soon as you get free, okay buddy?”

“Bra.”

Cloyster’s clamp lasted for two more turns (this is real life). Then, it released Abra. As soon as it did, the smaller Pokemon rolled back and created energy in his hands. The Cloyster charged Abra, but Abra held his ground and fired his psychic attack directly into the black slime in the middle of the Pokemon’s shell. An explosion sent Cloyster falling back into the sand, where it lay, unmoving, dazed and wounded. Ryan took out an empty ball, then aimed it at Cloyster.

“Gotta catch ‘em all!” Ryan bellowed before he threw the ball.

The red-and-white ball hit Cloyster on the side of its shell, then fell to the sand and cracked open. Pink light covered the wild Pokemon and then sucked it inside. For a few seconds, the ball wiggled on that quiet shore; Cloyster fought desperately for its freedom. But it was too weak and too damaged by Abra’s attack, and soon the ball stopped moving. Ryan had caught himself a new ‘mon. Whoop whoop!

By night, they reached Pallet Town. It was a small place with only a few houses and no Pokecenter, so Ryan had to use potions to heal Abra and his new Cloyster. They saw Christmas lights shining from all the houses. Snow was falling softly. As they walked further, the four kids saw a tall, unadorned, silver pole erected in the center of the town. Snow had fallen around it, but still it stood noble and proud. Next to it, a man in a heavy Gore-Tex jacket sat on a chair, ringing a bell.

“A Festivus for the rest of us! It’s a Festivus for the rest of us!” he sang, pleasantly.

Kelly moved up to him, trudging through the snow. “Excuse me sir, is this Pallet Town?”

The man’s face glowed in the reflection of Christmas lights and smiled. “Why of course it is, miss!”

“Is there any place to stay, like a hotel or something?” she inquired.

“Sorry. Pallet’s a small town, even this time of year. We don’t have a hotel.”

Kelly breathed out, hard. “Are you serious? Then where are we supposed to stay for the night?”

“You can stay with me,” the man said, pocketing his bell and standing up. “My mother’s house is just over there,” he pointed. “I’m visiting her for the holidays. I’m sure she’d be happy to have all of you join us.”

“Thank you,” Kelly said. She turned to face the others. “What do you say, guys?”

“Anything to get out of this cold!” Ryan replied.

“Sure,” Dean nodded.

“I’m the Doctor and I know it!” Rahul assured everyone.

“It’s a Festivus miracle! Follow me,” the man said, enthusiastically. He began walking toward a house in the distance with vibrant Christmas lights and a homely glow coming from the windows inside. Then, he stopped, raised a hand and half-waved at the four people following him. “I’m Ash, by the way. Ash Ketchum. Nice to meet you all.”

Episode 11: Oakheart
The man named Ash led Ryan and the gang to a quaint little house decorated in Christmas lights and snow. A frenzied Mr. Mime opened the door for them and ushered them inside, wiping the snow from their shoes with a broom and thrusting a hand vacuum into their faces menacingly, as if to try to clean their very skin (they were all very, very dirty). Ash ignored the Pokemon and brought everyone into the kitchen, where an older woman was sitting, drinking coffee.

“Uh, hey mom,” Ash began, “I found these trainers out in the snow. They were looking for somewhere to stay, and it looked like everywhere else was closed, so I thought I’d bring them back here…” he shrugged. “We have room don’t we?”

His mother stood up, her face flushing with a smile as she greeted each of Ryan’s gang. “I’m sure we’ll find some room for them. I hope one of you isn’t opposed to sleeping on the couch…”

“Thank you, Mrs. Ketchum,” Kelly said earnestly, bowing in respect. “We’re extremely grateful for you taking us in.”

“It’s no trouble,” the woman replied. “Though it might make Mimey a little anxious. Just don’t make a mess, or he’ll go crazy!”

They all swore on the old gods and the new that they would not incur the wrath of Mimey, and Mrs. Ketchum showed them where they would be staying. Ryan asked Ash to use their home phone, and Ash pointed him to a corner of the kitchen. The teal-haired trainer immediately called his mother, thinking it was not too late - she was probably still up drinking eggnog or playing Pokepoker with his dad or doing something else he didn’t want to think about or even think about thinking about.

“Hello?” came her voice from the fuzzy phone speaker. “Who is this?”

“H-hey mom, it’s me, Ryan. Merry Pokemas!” the boy spoke. “How’re things at home?”

“Oh Ryan, it’s nice to hear your voice,” his mother replied. “I thought you had forgotten about us. I hadn’t heard from you in a long time.”

Ryan’s voice was puzzled, “Didn’t you get my last message, mom?”

“That was weeks ago, Ryan. I’ve been worried that you haven’t called since, and I think your father is worried too, but he would never say so.”

Ryan scratched the back of his head, feeling his face go red. “Yeah, sorry I forgot. I guess after all this time trying to collect gym badges and catch Pokemon, it sort of slipped my mind.”

“So how is your journey going, Ryan? Have you met lots of nice people and caught many Pokemon?”

“Yeah… I’ve made some friends. I have a full team of six Pokemon now and three badges! We’re on our way to get the rest of them before the Indigo League Tournament begins. We still have a few months left before it does.”

“I’m proud of you, Ryan,” his mother said, her voice wistful and perhaps sad. “Your father thought you would be home for the holidays though. He hasn’t seen you since before you left on your journey.”

“Oh…” Ryan felt guilt hit him like a blizzard. “I’ll come home as soon as I can, but I don’t know how soon that will be…”

“It’s okay,” said his mother. “You need to finish collecting those gym badges first. I’m sure he understands.”

“Mom, did you tell him about Abra?” Ryan asked. “I… I tried to take one of the Pokemon he doesn’t use very much. Was he okay with that?”

There was a long pause. The wind was blowing outside the Ketchums’ kitchen door, howling like a feral Arcanine. “He knows why you took Abra. Though when you return, I think he’ll want to see his old Pokemon again.”

“Of course.”

“Okay Ryan, well I have to go now. Your father and I have the whole evening planned out.”

They said their goodbyes and Ryan hung up. He heard the others getting ready for bed in the rooms above him on the second floor. Rahul was yelling about something and Ryan could hear Kelly trying to calm the big brute down. Classic Kelly. Ryan took Abra’s Pokeball out of his bag and held it in his hand, feeling it over with his palm and eyes. Was his father really that angry about him taking Abra? Ryan hadn’t thought it would be an issue, else he wouldn’t have taken Abra at all. Still, he and the small Pokemon had bonded on their escapades thus far, and he was glad he had chosen Abra, even if that meant he was going to get a lecture from dad when he returned home.

“Heh, looks like you got the couch,” Ash Ketchum said, causing Ryan to spin around. The man had a sleeping bag in his hands and he led Ryan into the next room where he could sleep. “So you’re trainers, huh? Just passing through?”

“Yeah… well, not exactly.” Ryan pocketed Abra’s Pokeball. “I also wanted to see Professor Oak. I need to change my Pokemon’s name…”

Ash laughed. “I can show you where he lives in the morning. It’s hard to miss. Professor Oak’s lab is the main reason anyone comes to this little town anymore. It’s nice to have company.”

“Do you live here?”

“No, I’ve been staying in Cerulean City with my girlfriend,” said Ash. “But I came home for Pokemas, so my mom wouldn’t be lonely. She has a hard enough time living alone with Mimey these days.”

There was a moment of pause, where Ryan laid out his sleeping bag on the couch.

“Hey Ash, were you a trainer too? I mean, when you were younger?” Ryan asked, once he had finished making his bed. He thought Ash looked to be in his early twenties - maybe 20 or 21. He was definitely not ten years older than Ryan; that much was certain.

“Yeah, for a while. I collected all the Kanto badges when I was ten and finished in the top 16 in the Indigo League.”

“Wow,” Ryan said. “My father never did that well, and he tried a few times.”

Ash shrugged. “It’s not a big deal, really. There are plenty of great trainers and Pokemon masters who never win a tournament.”

“Pikapi!” a squeaky voice muttered from behind Ash. Then, a little Pikachu came bounding out from the other side of the couch with a pillow in its hand. The Pokemon handed it to Ryan, a dubious, reserved look on its yellow face. “Pikachu!”

“Uh, thanks!” Ryan replied, taking the pillow. “Is that guy yours?”

Ash smirked. “Yeah. Me and Pikachu go way back. He was actually my first Pokemon, heh.”

“Your first?” Ryan asked, his voice rising. “You mean you didn’t have a regular starter either?”

“Nope,” Ash said, scratching his Pikachu behind the ear. “But I’m glad I got Pikachu. I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

They ate dinner together as the winter snows fell outside, a fire burning in the Ketchum’s fireplace keeping them snug and content. Kelly got into an argument with Dean over who the last Indigo Tournament champion was, and Rahul told a story about the time he dated three girls at once - a tale not even his prized goatee believed. Ryan didn’t say much - he ate his food quietly, observing the others while he clutched Abra’s Pokeball under the table. He could not stop thinking about what his mother had said. Did he need to return Abra? Was that what his father wanted? Was Abra his? Abra had been the first Pokemon to join him on his journey, and the way Ryan felt about Abra was like how Ash felt about his Pikachu. Ryan didn’t want to have to return Abra to his father. But he didn’t know if it was an option to refuse.

Everyone went to bed not long after, and Ryan tossed and turned on the couch for what seemed like hours. Finally, in the dead of night, he thrust himself from the blankets, put on his warmest clothes, and left the house. He didn’t know where he was going - Ryan just needed to walk to clear his head. The snow was no longer falling heavily, but it was high and hard to trudge through. After getting his shoe caught in the snow and falling nearly a foot into it, the boy took out a Pokeball and threw it. Out from it came the Pokemon that had brought Ryan to this town: his Charmeleon.

“Okay Get Over Here,” he said, remembering the Pokemon’s true name. “I think that’s the last time I’ll have to call you that. Tomorrow Professor Oak is changing your name. I guarantee it.” Ryan winked and gave the Pokemon a thumbs up. The Charmeleon had no idea what the heck his master was talking about so he barked. “Use your ember attack, boy! Melt all the snow in our way!”

Get Over Here shouted, “Meleon meleon charmeleon!” and then it roared out flames in all directions, melting entire dunes of snow and even setting a nearby tree on fire.

“Ugh, you’re so careless!” Ryan whined before throwing Golduck’s Pokeball. “Quick Clawey, put out that tree!”

“Duck duck duck.”

Ryan eyed his two Pokemon, one melting all the snow, the other saving all the trees from the horrors of overzealous Pokefire. They were an odd couple indeed. “Hey, what the heck… why don’t we bring out the whole team?” Ryan threw the remaining four Pokeballs all at once. He was very talented.

“Brah…. abra!” Abra yawned as he rolled out of his Pokeball into a pool of cold snow water. “Abraaaaa!”

“Quiet Abra, you’ll wake the neighbors!”

“Ra.”

“Ieeeieieie!” Matata cooed.

“Neieieahalalaahal!” Thurnax responded.

Clostyer needed to get on the action too, since he was new and everyone was wondering what he’s like, “Cloyster… c-c-c-cloyster!!”

Ryan sighed and shook his head. “Yeah, you guys know I don’t understand a word you’re saying, right?”

“Cloyster,” said Cloyster.

The teal-haired boy wagged his finger. “Now now Cloyster, I’ll put you back in your Pokeball if you talk with a sass mouth.”

That horrified the Cloyster and he didn’t say another word for the rest of the episode.

And so they went, marching through the melted snow, aimless and freezing. Ryan hoped that a walk would make him feel like sleeping, but the more he went on, the less he felt like returning to Ash’s house. The blizzards had cleared up, and the sky was visible - the night’s stars were twinkling like shining city lights. Ryan swore he could see a pink dot up there, something not like the rest, but whenever he honed in on it, it seemed to vanish. In that sky was something watching, he thought, but what it could be, Ryan had no clue.

Pallet Town was a small place with very few buildings. After circling the entire town several times over, Ryan decided their best course of action was to go into Pallet’s diner, as it was the only store open at this hour of the night. As they approached, Ryan and his Pokemon gang in tow, the boy thought he saw something dark moving on the edge of sight, thought he heard wings flapping. He stopped and looked around. There was nothing but darkness and the weak artificial light emanating from the nearest lightpost. He crossed an empty street towards the diner when he heard the buzzing of wings yet again. This time, he was sure it wasn’t Matata, as the sound her wings made was softer. Whatever was making that sound was bigger than Matata - much bigger. Ryan gulped.

“Get Over Here,” he whispered, hoping whoever was out there wouldn’t take that as their cue. “Shoot an ember in that direction,” Ryan pointed down the street into the darkness. The Charmeleon obeyed, spitting fire and illuminating the desolate road for a fraction of a second. In that moment, Ryan heard the wings buzz again, and he caught a glimpse of something green shooting off behind a far building.

“It’s a Pokemon,” Ryan declared to a bunch of Pokemon. “Probably wild. Any of you want to go catch it? I’ll buy you something tasty at the PokeMart if you do!” The boy waved some Pokedollars in their little Pokefaces, but none of his buddies even flinched.

“M-m-meleon!” Get Over Here shivered, dancing in place, his wee little arms thrust up as if he was reaching for the moon. “Ch-ch-char… ch-charmeleon!”

“Fine, we’ll warm up in the diner first. But once you guys are nice and toasty, I want us to go catch that Pokemon, kay?”

“Eieieieieieie,” Matata agreed.

The place was mostly empty; a brown-haired boy in a white shirt was sitting in a far booth, and a waitress was sipping some coffee from behind a perched chair facing the other direction, but there was no one else.

“Uh, excuse me, is this place Pokemon friendly?” Ryan asked to the waitress who had her back to him.

She stood up and faced him, revealing herself to be none other than Mrs. Ketchum herself. “Oh,” she began, curiosity painted across her aged face. “Ryan, isn’t it? Weren’t you staying at my house?”

“Uh, yeah…”

“What are you doing here? I thought you were asleep. Plus, we ate dinner only a few hours ago. Don’t tell me my cooking’s that bad!”

The boy felt his face going red again, and he swallowed hard in an effort to prevent that. “Oh, no, you’re cooking’s great Mrs. Ketchum,” he said in an obligatory tone. “I… I, well I just couldn’t sleep is all. My Pokemon got cold, and this is the only open place…”

The woman had a shrewd look on her face, but she smiled all the same. “I’ll find you a table.”

Ryan’s Pokemon ordered enough food for a mob of Gremlins after midnight, and Ryan knew his wallet would be hurting come morning (rip in piece). They feasted on human food as if they had never eaten it before, the poor fellows. All the while, Ryan sat there feeling the brown-haired boy on the far side of the diner watching him. Ryan glanced at him a few times, and found him to have a familiar face - one which he had seen before but could not place. He almost wanted to get up and ask the other boy, but Ryan knew that was silly. Sane people don’t go up to one another and talk.

“Abra,” Ryan said, breaking the silence. Food and plates were being thrust around the table as if they were in a hurricane, so voracious were his little warriors as they traded dishes, tasting everything. “Yo Abra!”

“Ra!?” The Pokemon had a bowl of cheerios and milk mixed with hot and sour soup pressed to his mouth. “Rara abra!”

Ryan leaned in closer, as the little Pokemon was sitting across from him on a booster seat fit for an almost-newborn child. “Hey, when you were still with my dad, did he use you in a lot of battles? Were you one of his favorites? Is that why you have all those TMs and never evolved?”

“Bra. Abra!” The Pokemon took a swig of his cereal soup. “Abra abra abra, ra bra ah bra abra!”

“Yeah this isn’t working at all,” Ryan grumbled. “No matter how hard I try, I’ll never understand your gibberish! You make less sense than one of those casino games with all the pennies.”

“Abra!”

Before Ryan could respond, another voice cut into the conversation like a knife through salmonella. “Nice Pokemon.”

Ryan saw the brown-haired boy standing at the end of his table, a cool smirk on his face, his green eyes flickering like wildfire. He wore a white shirt and black pants fit for early summer, not the deepest part of winter. It made Ryan wonder how he didn’t get cold. “Thanks!” Ryan replied proudly. “I caught them all myself.”

“I’m sure you did. You’re a very good trainer.”

“Uh, thanks…” Ryan said. He detected a hint of sass mouth coming from the other boy. Just a hint.

“Welcome.”

Ryan ground his teeth. This was the perfect moment to be insane, and he wasn’t fully convinced it was a good idea. But he took a deep breath and didn’t think about the words that came next. “Hey, do I know you from somewhere?”

“I don’t think so,” said the other boy. “You weren’t at that Pokedebate on the proliferation of Tauros, were you?”

“No…”

“Haha mayne, you should have seen it. Some idiots were arguing that we need more Tauros in the world.”

“Well don’t we?”

“Nah dude, they’re too godly. I’d rather have a mongoose Pokemon anyway. Why can’t we just have a mongoose Pokemon? I don’t want to live in this world without one.” The boy took out a brown paper bag and began to drink from a concealed bottle inside it. He hiccupped.

With that, the boy walked off. He didn’t even say goodbye because he’s super rude and super fly. Mrs. Ketchum got up upon seeing the boy walk towards the door and waved. “Bye Charlie! Say hello to your father for me!”

Without turning around, Charlie raised his fist into the air, acknowledging the woman, bowed his head, and walked out the door. From the window, Ryan watched him throw a Pokeball onto the ground, and suddenly a Porygon materialized on the sidewalk.

“Aight Dragonmaster,” Charlie said, reaching into his backpack and pulling out a bucket, which he then firmly planted over his head. “Let’s wreck some dudes.” He took another swig from his brown paper bag.

With that, Charlie’s Porygon raced off into the night.

“Hey wait a minute!” Ryan said, standing up. It dawned on him all at once, causing him to feel lightheaded. “Wait, that was the kid on the poster in the Cinnabar Island PokeMart!”

“Duck golduck!”

“Yeah, I know!” Ryan lied. Ryan didn’t have time to wonder what Clawey had said. “It was a two million woolong prize! I don’t even know what a woolong is! But it sounds fancy as heck! We gotta catch that guy and find an Officer Jenny fast!”

“Neeee,” Thurnax screamed.

“Charmeleon.”

Ryan nodded. His pokemon were definitely in it to win it. He ran out of the diner, his Pokemon hot on his heels. Throwing his wallet to Mrs. Ketchum and crying “Take it all!” Ryan flew out the door. His Pokemon, as it turned out, were not close behind. All of them lumbered out of the establishment slowly, holding their swollen bellies and groaning softly. They had eaten too much, Ryan realized. There was no hope, none whatsoever, of catching Charlie the wily bandit. Dismayed, Ryan fell to his knees and shot air pistols at the sky. He was no cowboy, though.

It was then that Ryan heard the buzzing of wings yet again, and this time he saw the Pokemon. It was large, green, had swords for hands. Ryan knew its name without even needing Dex’s help.

“Scyther,” he breathed, his heart pounding in his ears. “No way. Ever since I was little I wanted one of those!”

He stood up, wide-eyed, in awe, and slowly approached the Pokemon. It was standing motionless in the middle of the street, sharpening its swords on one another. When it saw Ryan, it hissed.

“Easy boy,” he said, carefully grabbing an empty Pokeball from his bag. “No one’s gonna hurt you.”

Then, as the wind began to howl, Ryan took his chance and threw his Pokeball at the green creature. It casually knocked the ball away with one of his arms and took off into the night.

“Come on everyone, let’s go!” Ryan yelled; he rushed forward, scooping up his Pokeball, and pursued the Scyther into the darkness.

Of course, Ryan’s six Pokemon, bless their little gluttonous hearts, had overeaten to the extreme. They could barely waddle, let alone run, and they soon lost their master in the darkness. Ryan followed the Scyther to the edge of Pallet Town, to the place where the town converged with Route 1. The forest was beyond that point, as were patches of tall grass, a dangerous place for anyone to venture through in the dead of night, especially a trainer who had no Pokemon with him. Ryan stopped at the edge, breathing hard, his hands on his knees.

He waited there for many hours as his Pokemon moved at a snail’s pace until they reached him at the edge of town just as the sun began to rise in the distance. Upon seeing his crew, Ryan shook his head and facepalmed. “It’s too late,” he said hoarsely. “The Scyther got away.”

“Scytheeeer!!” a voice boomed through the forest from. Ryan screamed and ran back a few paces, for that was far too spooky for him.

And then, as if from the heavens, the green hunter descended from the tree, majestic as Rahul on prom night. “Scyther!!!!”

It began to move about in front of Ryan and the gang as if it were having a seizure or dancing to Katy Perry. Either way, the Scyther seemed to be in fits, thrusting its body back and forth, shaking its sword arms in the air like it was trying to exorcise demons from its body.

“Oh my god, it’s horrible!” Ryan shrieked. “The worst thing I ever saw in the whole wild world. Dex save us!”

He pointed his Pokedex at the madman Scyther. “Scyther is performing Swords Dance,” the device stated. “Its attack will be raised two stages.”

“What’s two stages?” Ryan grabbed his hair and fell to the ground, his eyes bloodshot and wide open. “What’s going on? Is this real life?!”

“Scyther scythe!”

“Charmeleon… someone… attack him!” Ryan despaired.

Scyther rushed forward and knocked over Charmeleon before the fire ‘mon could conjure up another ember attack. He sliced and diced his way through the other five until they all fell over, stunned or fainted. Ryan rolled over and beheld his defeated team. “No way!”

“Scyther,” Scyther retorted proudly.

“I’ll get you for this!” Ryan shouted, readying his Pokeball again as he stood up. He did a little ballerina twirl and then flung the thing at the Scyther.

But the Pokemon was too fast - it dodged out of the way, hopping into the nearest tree and disappearing into the forest. As the sun rose into the sky of the new day, Ryan’s Pokeball sailed into the forest, above the wet dew hanging on endless blades of tall grass. Just then, a small purple Pokemon raised its head from the grass and the Pokeball smacked it right in the forehead. Stunned, the Pokemon fell over and was quickly sucked into the ball. In the next second, the Pokeball rose into the air and then disappeared into nothingness.

“What just happened?!” Ryan said, dumbfounded. “I don’t even know which Pokemon I caught! Dexy, explain yourself.”

“As you wish, wise master,” Dex said. “Since you already have six Pokemon with you, any further Pokemon you capture will be sent to the Pokecenter in the hometown linked to this Pokedex for storage.”

“Hmm…” Ryan scratched his chin. “This was my father’s Pokedex, so they must be going into his old storage container in Acapulco… But Dex, is there any way for me to see which Pokemon I just caught? I can’t travel all the way to Acapulco right now…”

“Avast ye landlubber!” came the unmistakable voice of Pinkbeard the first. “Didya think ya defeated me last time, argh?”

The man with two peg legs, two hooks for hands, and pink nose hairs that formed a ragged beard stepped out from behind a bush. A boy in a black suit with the letter “R” emblazoned on the shirt followed him. Pinkbeard patted the boy on the head with a hook which really just got tangled in his hair and caused the boy to scream out in pain and thrash about like a stuck pig.

“Yargh! This here be my son Gillford Matilda Gooseman! He be here to help me get revenge on ya!” the pirate pointed a hook gravely at Ryan. “Yargh!”

“Shut up, dad! I told you my name is The Supreme Extreme and I’m the newest member of Team Rocket! I’m not here to help you get revenge! I’m here to help Team Rocket take over the world!” He jumped forward and struck a pose that would have brought a tear to Captain Ginyu’s eye. “You!” he pointed at Ryan. “Tell me where Professor Oak’s lab is! I heard he’s got a whole bunch of godly Pokemon in there.”

“I dunno what you’re talking about,” Ryan replied. “Honestly, you sound like you’ve had too much o-”

Gillford jumped forward with a flying kick and a high-pitched squeal, hitting Ryan right in his pretty little nose. The blue-haired trainer was taken aback by the attack and fell backwards in confusion. He tasted blood and felt pain wash over his face. As he lay there in the dirt, Ryan saw Gillford and Pinkbeard pull out a pair of net guns and move forward. Ryan watched them trap his Pokemon in the nets, and though he screamed for them to stop, the deadly duo paid him no heed. Then, once all six were safely locked away in netting, Gillford walked back over to Ryan, net gun in hand, and grinned.

“I’m the Supreme Extreme! I’m a god! I have all the power! Hear me roar! Look at my chi!” Spittle dripped from his lips; his crazed, beady little eyes shot this way and that as if, in his paranoia, he felt like he was being watched. “You’re no match for me, kid! I can levitate. Watch this!”

Gillford raised the net gun and then smacked Ryan on the back of the head with it, instantly knocking out our poor protagonist.

Episode 12: Tauros, Tauros, Tauros!
Ryan awoke from a particularly sticky dream about some boysenberry jam to find that his head was killing him. He was woozy, like he had just drank a gallon of orange juice (not that he would know what that felt like, to be sure). The Pokemon trainer stood up and yawned, finding himself wholly alone on the edge of Pallet Town. The sun was high in the sky. It was far later in the day than the last time he had been awake. That worried him.

“Wh… what happened?” the boy asked, rubbing his sore head.

“Scyther! Scytheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!!!!”

Ryan spun around and saw a Scyther perched on a nearby tree branch. It tilted its head and screamed. It was a perfect target, sitting there calmly, and he wasn’t about to let the chance get away from him. The boy reached for a Pokeball, but found that his backpack was gone. That was when he remembered what had happened.

“Sweet Jeremiah!” the boy yelled in frustration. “That kid took all my Pokemon!”

“Scyther scythe scythe!”

Ryan scowled at the Scyther. “All I wanted to do was catch you! And look at the mess you’ve gotten me in! Well, are you gonna help me or what? I need to get my Pokebuddies back!”

The mantis Pokemon didn’t say anything to that, and when Ryan took a step forward to press the issue, it jumped back and flew off into the tall grass.

“Curses!” Ryan shook his fist at the sky. “What good’s a Pokemon trainer without any Pokemon?”

He found Pallet Town to be in utter chaos when he returned. He remembered that Gillford - The Supreme Extreme, as he wanted to be called - had said Professor Oak had a whole bunch of godly Pokemon he was going to steal. Hopefully the kid hadn’t stolen them yet, otherwise his own Pokemon could be long gone. But what Ryan found in the town did not get his hopes up.

Large three-tailed beasts were rampaging through the streets, running through houses, knocking over cars, and causing pedestrians to flee in all directions. Smoke and dust filled the air, as did the shouts of horrified citizens. Gillford must’ve done this, Ryan thought. But he’s careless… he let Professor Oak’s Pokemon out without catching them first. Ryan thought he saw Kelly and Rahul running down a street in the opposite direction, their Pokemon running alongside them. They must be trying to help calm things down. He frowned again, thinking about how he wanted to be there with them, how he wanted to show the world just how good a trainer he was. ''But I’m not a good trainer. I lost all my Pokemon. I have to get them back!''

One of the beasts came Ryan’s way, huffing and mooing and stamping its feet. Ryan ducke aside and pulled out old Dexy from his pocket.

“What the heck is that?” he asked his machine.

“Tauros, the Wild Bull Pokemon. A rowdy Pokémon with a lot of stamina. Once running, it won't stop until it hits something.”

“Crap…” Ryan breathed. “This whole town’s gonna get smashed to bits if that’s true! We have to put a stop to this!”

Pocketing Lil’ Dex, Ryan rushed forward, down the street, and into pandemonium. He kept running through the smoke and past the Pokemon and people until he came to Professor Oak’s lab. It was situated on a hill, and as Ryan raced up the steps, he saw the figure of a boy in all black at the top.

When Ryan reached Gillford, he saw the young member of Team Rocket directing his Pokemon against those in Professor’s Oak’s backyard. He had knocked down a fence, letting out numerous Tauros and other creatures. At the same time, his own Pokemon, a Primeape, a Graveler, a Growlithe, a Poliwrath, and a Mr. Mime, were attacking Professor Oak’s Pokemon (and the reserve Pokemon of all Pallet Town trainers), and Gillford had a bag of Pokeballs next to him. Whenever his Pokemon took out one of their quarry, he would throw a Pokeball and catch the thing. His pile was growing taller by the minute.

Ryan spied his own backpack on Gillford’s back and ran over to get it, his fists raised, when, out of nowhere, something tackled him from behind. He saw sky; then he saw ground and tasted dirt and felt something squeezing him hard.

“Hahaha! You dummy!” Gillford said, turning around to meet Ryan. “I beat you again! I’m so powerful!” He raised his right hand and revealed that he was holding a piece of cardboard with a crudely-drawn female face on it, lipstick and all. He kissed the thing passionately. “Yeah, victory! I’m the best, I’m the best, I’m The Supreme Extreme!”

“You… you’re crazy!” Ryan gasped as he felt himself being squeezed tighter. He looked around and caught a glimpse of the Pokemon holding him - a Tentacruel. It was using its wrap attack to immobilize and choke him.

“No, I’m The Supreme Extreme! And this is my wife, Mrs. Supreme Extreme. You’ll tell her how beautiful she is!”

“No I won’t,” Ryan replied. “I don’t do crazy!”

“She’s beautiful!” Gillford squealed like a ten-year-old chipmunk. “Look, look! She’s levitating! She’s a god! She’s reached a higher plane of existence!” he cried, waving around his cardboard girlfriend.

“Ba'hee Priss Dimmie…” Ryan muttered.

“What was that? You scoundrel! How dare you talk to a god like that! Is this anyway to treat the best Pokemon Master in the entire world?! Tentacruel, wrap him tighter! Make him feel supreme pain! For Team Rocket!!”

The Tentacruel obliged and tightened its hold on Ryan. The blue-haired boy screamed; he felt like he was being pressed into a vise. Just when he felt the last bits of air leaving his lungs and began seeing spots, Ryan felt sudden relief - he felt himself falling forward. As he crashed into the ground, he beheld the Tentacruel fall down unconscious next to him.

“Wh… what’s going… on…?” he gasped, rubbing his raw neck.

“Scyther! Scyyyyy!”

Before Ryan and Gillford stood the proud visage of the wild mantis Pokemon. It brandished its blade claws and screamed at Gillford. The Supreme Extreme shrieked like a schoolgirl and jumped back.

“Team of Gods, attack this wild animal!” he commanded his five quite average Pokemon.

Catching his breath, Ryan stood up and walked over to Scyther. “Hey, thanks for that! I guess better late than never, right?”

“Scyther!” the thing said in a crazed scream.

“All right, you’re gonna need to help me defeat this weird kid so I can get back my Pokemon, all right? One ‘Scyther’ for yes.”

“Scyther.”

That made Ryan smile. He took out Lil’ Dex and aimed it at Scyther. “All right you gorgeous piece of metal, tell me what moves Scyther knows.”

“I feel pretty, oh so pretty,” Dex said in monotone. “This Scyther knows the moves: Agility, Slash, Swords Dance, and Focus Energy.”

“We’re in business!” Ryan whooped. Pointing at the five Pokemon converging on him and Scyther, he shouted, “Swords Dance, Scyther, now!”

The bug Pokemon began to convulse again, this time in the flavor of Lady Gaga, and it was almost too much for Ryan to watch. He felt like throwing up or throwing himself from a balcony - perhaps both. Yet, by the time he was done, Gillford’s Pokemon had not yet reached him, so Ryan shrugged and shouted again.

“Okay, Slash ‘em up! Two attacks in a row yeah!”

“Scytheeeeeeer!”

He moved like a scythe through cotton candy, a green tornado of pain and heartbreak. Soon, the five godly Pokemon fell to the ground, dazed and of no more use.

The Supreme Extreme looked like he was nearly in tears. “N-no! They were godly! I trained them myself! Star Serelinglingauliniean and Deshawn Equinneus are the two strongest Pokemon ever to live! It’s a fact!”

Ryan didn’t know (and didn’t want to ask) why that insane trashboy had named his Pokemon so, and instead he stuck his tongue out. “Nananananana, I swept your team!”

“Cheater!” Gillford declared. “He’s a cheater, isn’t that right honey?” The cardboard cutout being held up by his right hand nodded. “See!”

“Yeah, I see!” Ryan replied, stepping forward and grinning. “I see you flying off into the distance! Scyther remove the trash! Send him where all good Team Rocket members go!”

And so he did. The Scyther bore down on Gillford and kicked him into the sky. Ryan’s backpack fell off of Gillford from the force of the attack and landed harmlessly on the ground. As the boy sailed off into the wild blue yonder, he screeched:

“Noooooo!!!! I’m blasting off for the first time!”

Scyther then followed that up by punting all of Gillford’s Pokemon after him. I guess he didn’t catch any legendaries after all.

“Good boy, Scyther!” Ryan beamed. He grabbed his backpack, made sure all six of his Pokemon were tucked away in their Pokeballs, and then tossed the wild mantis Pokemon a treat. “It’s an ultra-rare candy,” Ryan explained. “I won it off of Rahul after he bet me he could do a handstand. He didn’t even come close.”

The Scyther caught the candy in its mouth and gulped it down. “Scyther scythe,” it replied happily. Then, without warning, white light began to emanate from the Pokemon’s body, and he began to shake. “Scytheeeeeeeeeeeeeeer!!” the Pokemon yelled in an alarmed tone.

“What’s going on? Dex, explain!”

“You have given this Pokemon an ultra-rare candy. Ultra-rare candy is essentially Pokeroids,” the Pokedex replied. “Good job. I hope you are proud of yourself. I know I am.”

And such words could not have been truer, for as the light faded, Ryan noticed that where once had been a Scyther now stood a physical specimen of so fine a strain it would have impressed even dear old Ahnold. Covered in rippling muscles it was, massive and numerous, and its entire body seemed to shimmer with the light of midday. The Scyther was bigger than it had been before, and Ryan hoped that meant it was way more powerful now. It peered at the blue-haired boy solemnly.

“Now that’s a god Pokemon if I ever saw one!” Ryan declared.

“Scyther,” the animal whispered gruffly. Even its attitude had become more menacing.

“Okay boy, we still have a problem on our hands,” Ryan continued. “Pinkbeard is still out there, plus all those Tauros are loose! We have to save Pallet Town, boy. It’s up to us!”

“Scy scy scyther.”

The two ran across to the other side of Professor Oak’s lab where they could look down on the town. They could see Kelly and Dean and Rahul and Ash all battling the Tauros as best they could with the Pokemon they had. Ash’s Pikachu and Rahul’s Magneton were combining their electrical capabilities into one to try to zap the Tauros, but there were too many of the rampaging beasts and they were spread across the entire town. Kelly’s Arcanine was running up and down the streets trying to flame the Tauros into submission, but after a few such fire attacks, one annoyed Tauros turned and charged him, knocking the Arcanine out cold.

“With that ultra-rare candy in your system, you should be able to take them on, right boy?” Ryan asked. When his Pokemon nodded, he pointed at the Tauros below. “Okay, go knock all of the Tauros out. Agility now! And once you’re all fast, use Slash attacks!”

“Scyther.”

The green Pokemon flew down to the half-ruined town and worked his way through the charging Tauros like a butcher through a bowl of brown. Gleefully Ryan watched as Scyther knocked out all of the Pokemon he came into contact with. He found Pinkbeard demagoguing on top of a car with his Pokemon around him and sent all of them where Gillford had gone. Two Tauros chose to storm him as he glided towards them, but Scyther dodged their simple attacks by flying over them. When he did a backflip in midair and then landed on their backs, Scyther wasted no time in knocking them unconscious.

In the center of Pallet Town, Rahul and Ash stood with their Pokemon as the Tauros charged them from all sides. It looked like they were going to be run over until Scyther appeared and slashed the Tauros into submission.

With the last Tauros incapacitated, silence descended on the devastated town. Ryan and Kelly and Rahul helped Ash collect the Tauros into Pokeballs. Dust hung heavy in the air as the sun began to set over the forest of the wilderness. As he was helping capture all of the sleeping Tauros, Ryan noticed Scyther standing on the edge of Pallet Town, far removed from the rest of the people, sharpening his blades on one another. Finding this most curious, the Pokemon trainer walked over to the wild Pokemon hesitantly.

“Hey, Scyther! What are you doing out here?”

“Scyther!”

“You’re a hero, Scyther,” Ryan said. “You saved everyone. I can’t thank you enough! Without your help, I would’ve lost all the Pokemon I worked so hard to get.”

“Scyther scyther.”

Ryan scratched the back of his head. “So… why don’t you come back with us? You could be my Pokemon. You could travel around Kanto with me! I’m going to collect all of the Gym Badges. It could be fun…”

“Scy…” the Pokemon replied, stepping away from Ryan.

“It’s just… you know… I thought, after what we’ve just been through, together, you might wanna…”

“Scyther!” Scyther declared. He stared at Ryan for a moment, then turned away and took to the air.

“Wait, stop!” Ryan raised his hand. “Please, don’t go!”

But Scyther did not listen. Instead, he flew on, above the tall grass, towards the setting sun. Ryan let his hand drop and felt tears come to his eyes. He did not move as he watched the wild mantis Pokemon become a speck on the pink-orange horizon.

A hand fell on Ryan’s shoulder. “Hey kid, don’t beat yourself up about it. Not every Pokemon can be tamed. Sometimes you’ve got to let them go.”

Kelly’s voice was soft, kind, unlike her. That had taken aback Ryan almost as much as Scyther fleeing. “Th-thanks,” he mumbled, not turning to face her. He didn’t want her to see him crying.

“Don’t let it get to you, Ryan. There’ll be plenty of time to catch more Pokemon. We’ve got a long way to go before we reach the Indigo League.”

They watched the sun set for a few minutes before Kelly spoke again. The world was still as a painting, save for the sounds of feral Pokemon in the deep wilderness ahead. “Come on, we need to go back. Ash and Professor Oak wanted to talk to us. They’re at the lab.”

Ryan screwed up his face and wiped away his tears. He followed Kelly back into town, past the broken buildings and cars and refuse now covering most of the ground. They climbed the steps to Professor Oak’s lab for a second time that day, and for Ryan, it was with a much heavier heart, even though he had gotten his Pokemon back.

Awaiting them at the top, just inside the building, were Ash, Rahul, Mrs. Ketchum, Dean, and Professor Oak himself. They all smiled warmly upon seeing Ryan.

“There he is,” Professor Oak chuckled. “Thank you for saving my lab and the town, Ryan.”

“No problem.”

“I still can’t believe that happened!” Mrs. Ketchum exclaimed. “My diner was nearly destroyed! Oh, it’ll take Mimey forever to clean up the mess in there!”

“Yeah, I wonder what those two were up to letting all of my Tauros out,” Ash wondered aloud. “Kelly, you said they were part of Team Rocket?”

“Well, the kid was,” Kelly said. “His father is just a crusty old pirate.”

“They did so much damage,” Ash said, shaking his head. “I’m gonna have to stay here a lot longer than I had planned to help fix everything up.”

“But it wasn’t your fault,” Kell reminded him. “Team Rocket should have to fix this.”

“Knowing them, there’s no way they would,” Ash sighed. “But even though they managed to damage so much of the town, it would have been a lot worse if you hadn’t helped us when you had, Ryan. Your Scyther really saved the day.”

“Yeah…” Ryan replied, detached. “Couldn’t have done it without him.”

Ash patted him on the shoulder. “Here, as a token of our appreciation, take these.” He reached in his pocket and pulled out four Pokeballs. “A Tauros for each of you for helping to save Pallet Town. I mean, I have a whole herd of them. I’m never going to use them all in battle. So please accept this gift.”

“Oh yeah!” Rahul exclaimed, raising his screwdriver to the sky. “This calls for a celebration!” He clapped his hands and suddenly, two scantily-clad girls appeared holding plates of sweet rolls. Rahul didn’t hesitate to stuff his mouth with as many as he could while everyone else watched on in slight bemusement.

“Well, unfortunately, we have to get going,” Kelly said, finally breaking the awkward silence. “The Indigo League is starting pretty soon and all of us still need some more badges.”

“Yeah,” said Ryan cheerlessly.

“Before you go,” Professor Oak spoke up, “wasn’t there something you wanted? Ash told me one of you had a Pokemon with a name that needed changing.”

Ryan had almost forgotten, after all the events that had taken place that day. He fumbled in his bag before finding his Charmeleon’s Pokeball. Then, he presented it to Professor Oak. “If you can, I’d like to change this guy’s name to Aegon, please.”

As the day turned to night, our four heroes set out on their journey once again. They said their goodbyes to Ash, his mother, and Professor Oak, who all thanked them profusely for helping them re-capture the Tauros. They left Pallet Town a grim place; it would take many months, perhaps even years, for that humble place to be repaired and rebuilt. Ryan wouldn’t forget that. For all of Gillford’s silly rambling, he was a genuinely bad person - he had threatened the lives of every member of Pallet Town and destroyed millions of dollars worth of property. If Ryan ever saw him again, he’d make that kid rue the day he attacked Professor Oak’s lab.

They set off down Route 1, flashlights in hand. Fireflies were buzzing and the air was fresh with the smell of grass. Kelly and Rahul and Dean were all in high spirits because they had acquired a new Pokemon, but for Ryan, the gift of the Tauros did not replace what he felt he had lost in Scyther.

Ryan fell to the back of the group and pulled six Pokeballs out of his bag and released the Pokemon from them. Regardless of how he was feeling, he had an obligation to his Pokemon, to make sure they got enough attention and were well-loved. They were probably frightened from being recently captured, and he needed to alleviate their fears. Ryan needed to show them that they were home again. Abra, Clawey, Matata, Cloyster, Dragonair, and Aegon came tumbling out of their balls.

“Hey guys, I’ve missed you! How is everybody?” His Pokemon whooped and laughed and bade their master good evening. It was a good feeling, Ryan knew, having someone care for you. And his Pokemon did, just as he cared for them. “Let’s go get some more badges, what do you say?”

His Pokemon screamed in agreement, and Ryan had to smile. As much as he wanted to wallow in regret, he couldn’t. Life goes on. He had to get the rest of the Gym Badges before the Indigo League started, and now he had a team of six to do so. So Ryan and his Pokemon rejoined Kelly and Rahul and Dean as they set off down the road to Viridian City and their next adventure.

Episode 13: Where The Wild Things Are
In the morning, the group continued on towards Viridian City. By noon, they could see the faintest signs of civilization looming in the distance, just above the horizon of the Viridian forest. Upon seeing this, Dean took the lead and led them swiftly down the grassy, wild path that was Route 1. It was like he really wanted to get home, or something.

In Ryan’s hand was his new Tauros’ Pokeball. The Tauros - which he had named NaVorro - would be a great addition to his team. He had replaced old Matata with NaVorro last night; the process grieved the young trainer’s heart, in truth - she had been with Ryan on his Pokemon journey since nigh the very start. She had helped him get his very first gym badge. But she was just too weak. He hoped she wouldn’t mind.

Next to Ryan lumbered Rahul, his great belly swinging like a trash bag full of water with every step. In his hand was a plate of chicken and waffles, and he had syrup running down his lips and into his goatee. The devastation of the sweet stickiness was a grim sight to behold and even more tragic since they were all out in the wilderness and Rahul had no easy way to remedy himself of his sticky situation (save for, perhaps, thrusting his face into a river, which the well-cultured boy would never do (unless he was rewarded with food for doing that)). Despite that, the amiable bloke seemed not to care, and he was sucking on his fingers like they were made of cool whip.

“Hey Rahul, Dexy told me that Tauros is a great Pokemon. Did you add the one Ash gave you to your lineup?” Ryan asked the good-natured trainer as they walked side-by-side down the dirt path.

“What? Are you crazy?!” Rahul scoffed down two waffles in a breath. It was an astonishing feat of gluttony. He clapped his hands and two scantily-clad females burst out from the bushes and ran up to him with more steaming hot plates of chicken and waffles for sweet Rahul. He grunted in pleasure seeing the two plates and took them with great impatience. Then, the two women disappeared into the bushes again. As this had been happening ever since Ryan had first met Rahul, he no longer questioned such absurdities. “Your Pokedex must be broken. Magneton is way better than Tauros.” And with that, he downed another plate of breakfast. Ryan thought the boy had eaten enough for fourth breakfast, which would have made Merry and Pippin quite happy.

“Whatever you say, big man,” Ryan smiled. He trusted Dexy far more than Rahul, though. He liked his chances with the big, powerful wild bull Pokemon.

Kelly was in high spirits too, for she had also received a Tauros from Ash, and that meant that she had finally acquired a team of six. “I’m almost ready to challenge the Viridian City Gym Leader,” she told Ryan. “I think I need to get in a little more training, first. I haven’t used a Tauros in battle before. It would be nice to get familiar with Patrice before I use him in the gym battle.”

“Well at least you aren’t like Rahul,” Ryan observed. “He doesn’t see the value in a Tauros at all.”

Kelly’s face went pale and her eyes nearly bulged out of her skull. “Is he crazy?! This is Kanto! Tauros is one of the best Pokemon in the region. You can’t not have a Tauros on your team! It’s like thinking the first Pokemon theme isn’t the best one!”

“I tried to tell him, but he thought Magneton is better.”

Kelly nearly threw up, Rahul’s antics disgusted her so. “Well, if he finds a way to beat this Gym Leader, good for him. But he’ll be wanting that Tauros when he realizes how weak his team is without it.”

Poor guy. Ryan nodded in approval and felt his stomach growl for some chicken and waffles. Or maybe that was Abra, who was perched on his shoulder like a loyal parrot. The small Pokemon appeared to be asleep, and he was swinging this way and that, as precariously perched on Ryan’s shoulder as a glass of water. But Abra didn’t like his Pokeball, and Ryan had not the heart to keep him in there too long, so this mad game was like to continue for some time.

“It doesn’t matter, though,” Kelly continued. “You two can’t face the Viridian City Gym Leader anyways.”

“What, why?!” Ryan was so startled at that bit of information that he jumped and caused Abra to go flying off of him and into the bushes. At once, Abra was confronted by another Pokemon: a ferocious Rattata! It was a hideous beast, as powerful as a carton of milk if Ryan had ever saw one. Abra yawned and hit it with Psychic. The poor purple rat went flying off into the deep forest, and Ryan wondered if that would allow Pokemon to become well-acquainted with Rahul’s food servants.

Kelly was not amused, and she did not even give Abra a thumbs up for defeating that super hard (and probably level 2) Rattata. That was okay, for Ryan lumped his Pokemon with many a praise as the little guy mounted Ryan’s shoulder again. “You need the other seven badges before you can go to the Viridian City gym,” she explained. “It’s the hardest gym. Only the best trainers can get through to take part in the Indigo League.”

Well that was not fair, not fair at all. Ryan had started this journey not too long ago and he had planned on going with Kelly to the end. But since he had started so late, she had gathered far more gym badges than him. How now was their journey together supposed to continue? He felt a flush creeping up on his face as he opened his mouth again, “B-but… I still have to get all of my other badges. Aren’t you coming with me?”

A strange look flickered across Kelly’s face as she looked over to him. Then, after a pause, the pink-haired girl shook her head. “Once I’ve got the last badge, I’m going to the Indigo Tournament. If you can get all the other badges in time, maybe I’ll see you there.”

The words stung like a slap to the face, and Ryan was left speechless. He stopped walking, even as the others continued on, not noticing how affected he was. “I… I thought we were going on this adventure together…” he whispered to himself. “I don’t want to be alone again…”

“Abra,” Abra contended.

“Abra,” Ryan replied sadly.

When he rejoined the group, Kelly had taken a few of her Pokeballs out of her pack. He saw her throw them into the tall grass on the left side of the path. Instantly, ‘Aichu and Patrice materialized. “All right,” the girl began, “this is a good place to stop. We should get in some last minute training before we get to Viridian City.”

“Why should we?” Ryan snapped. “Rahul and I aren’t going to the gym.”

Kelly laughed at Ryan’s attitude. “Then wait for me in the Pokemon Center. But your Pokemon could use some training too for when you finally do return to this gym.” She grabbed two more Pokeballs and threw them, releasing her Arcanine, Fluffy, and her Wartortle, Tortilla. “I didn’t think you’d turn down a chance to make your Pokemon stronger, Ryan, but if that’s what you want, then go…”

Ryan scrunched up his face like a rapturous gremlin. “Okay, okay! I’ll stay. My new guys could use some training, I guess.”

“Oh, are we stopping here?” Rahul said in a dazed voice. He had continued walking on with Dean when he realized the other two had stopped. Taking selfies of the ruination that was his sticky face with his Sonic Screwdriver had caused Rahul to lose so much awareness that, briefly, he was almost promoted to Lieutenant of that venture in Ryan’s eyes. “I guess it’s a good time for a snack.” The boy snapped his fingers, and a woman came stumbling out from behind a tree ahead, ran over to him, and handed him a plastic bag of trail mix, minus the trail and the mix. All that was left was the good part - the M&M's. And if Ryan knew Rahul - and he sure as heck didn’t - he would have expected no less.

Dean, who was leading them down the path, suddenly stopped, and turned around to glare at Kelly. “We’re not stopping here. I need to get home.”

“Well, kid, I need to train my Pokemon before we get there!” Kelly bit her lip, but did not back down. She put her hands on her hips and stood defiant to the younger boy. The way she looked then gave Ryan a tingly feeling down his chest. “And we’ll wait however long that takes.”

“Not me,” Dean replied. “I’m going home. I don’t even know who you people are, really. I don’t have to stay with you.”

“We’re not making you stay with us,” said Kelly.

Dean glowered. “It’s my way or the highway!” he said, annoyed.

Kelly shrugged. “Suit yourself.”

“Bye Dean. You were cool!” Ryan waved. “I’ll never forget how you defeated Pinkbeard! That was awesome.”

Rahul ate a handful of M&M’s.

Ryan had not known the boy very well. Aside from when Dean had saved him from Pinkbeard on the boat, Ryan had not had many interactions with the black-haired boy at all. And that was all well and good, since the boy was much younger than him, and they wouldn’t have much to talk about. Even when they had stayed at Ash’s house, he had only talked with Dean briefly. They had not been traveling companions so much as they had been strangers traveling to the same destination together. And now they were going to be separated. Ryan felt a little sad, but not much. That kid was cool, but he and Ryan had never bonded.

And so Dean went off down Route 1, alone. Ryan and the others released every one of their Pokemon - 18 in all - to fight the various wild Pokemon along the road. Ryan was a bit dubious at this strategy, since after a few rounds, he realized the wild Pokemon were weaker than a ninety-eight year old fiddler halfway up the roof. He didn’t think their Pokemon were getting much stronger with each passing fight, but he dared not say that to Kelly, for as determined as she was, he didn’t want to get on her bad side.

Ryan was very proud of his Pokemon: Aegon, the Charmeleon, was a seasoned fighter who fought his opponents with cold determination; Abra was as powerful as he had ever been, and lazily dealt with his quarry without even lifting an eyelid; NaVorro, Ryan’s newest Pokemon, proved to be quite powerful as well, as he viciously demolished all of the scary powerful Rattatas he went up against; Clawey handled his foes like he was a wild Pokemon himself and knew his way around the tall grass; Thurnax’s majestic force was a beauty to behold, and as he saw his Dragonair take out scores and scores of Pidgeys and Rattatas, Ryan nearly cried it was so beautiful to him; and last, but not least was Ryan’s Cloyster, who he had named Myrrah since she last appeared. Like the others, she easily took out dozens and dozens of wild Pokemon until their unconscious bodies piled up high as trees around them. Where all these Pokemon came from, Ryan did not know. The small patch of tall grass they were in did not seem like a big enough ecosystem to support so many hundreds of Pokemon, but he did not question it.

All of this took place in little more than two minutes, for Ryan’s Pokemon were legit (Kelly’s and Rahul’s probably were too, but Ryan had not the attention span to note their fights). And as Ryan was congratulating his buddies for wasting endless waves of wild Pokemon, he suddenly heard a noise coming from ahead. He raised his head like a Meerkat (or the Pokemon equivalent if there was one, but since there wasn’t one in Generation 1, Ryan didn’t care ‘bout that, no sir).

There stood Dean in the center of Route 1. Another boy, slightly taller than him, was standing in the tall grass to his right, and after a few seconds, walked out of the wilderness and onto the path himself. Ryan thought the two looked eerily similar. They were both Asian; that was a certainty. And they had a look about them, a certain type of face that would be too inappropriate for Ryan to explain in much detail here. Suffice to say, Ryan thought the two were related.

He could hear them talking, but did not understand them. It was like they were talking in some kind of Pokespeak, though it could very well have been Chinese. Ryan could not distinguish the two from one another, of course. After a few moments, Dean and Big Dean turned around and walked back to the three trainers laying waste to the wilderness.

As they got closer, Rahul let out a squeal of delight, like a hungry Slowbro. “Alex, Alex, Alex! Yo! Alex! Aleeeex!!” he yelled, waving his hands over his head. Ryan and Kelly and their Pokemon watched this in silent awe. All of the battles stopped, and the lucky surviving wild Pokemon ran for the hills, bless their spleens.

The two Chinese kids arrived with smiles on their faces. The one Rahul called Alex put on a pair of sunglasses, then took a gigantic yo-yo out of his backpack, raised in the air and made some kind of gang sign with his hand. Then, unprompted, he burst out into a show of flinging the yo-yo around. Dean had a boombox in his hand and played some balla tunes as Alex flung himself about in some kind of show. This was all very bizarre to Ryan, who wished they could just go back to genociding wild Pokemon instead of watching Chinese kids convulse about with big yo-yos.

Once Alex was done with his spontaneous performance, he took a bow, and everyone clapped mightily for the little guy. Though Ryan could see he was several years older than Dean, he wasn’t actually that much taller. He wore a blue short-sleeved shirt with a grey long-sleeved undershirt, a red scarf, and black pants and looked like a small gust of wind could blow him over, he was so skinny and tiny.

“Sup, Rahul,” Alex said at last, in a voice that seemed too deep for such a small dude. “Didya… miss me?”

Dean laughed. Rahul grunted in approval. Kelly and Ryan watched in awe. Alex’s words sent shivers down Clawey’s spine - Ryan would bet a million Pokedollars on that.

“Hey… so hey, that kid’s your brother, right?”

“Yeah, that’s Dean. He’s my brother.”

Ryan couldn’t believe an actual human being would say something so obvious.

“Awesome!” Rahul said, chuckling and with a glimmer in his eyes. “We met him on the boat ride back from Cinnabar Island. He’s cool.”

“Yeah, he told me all about it,” Alex said. He looked happy enough, but that gruff voice of his seemed like it was an impersonation of someone Ryan did not know.

“Hi, I’m Ryan!” Ryan shouted. “I’m a Pokemon trainer.”

Alex nodded. “Alright.”

Kelly was messing with a strand of her pink hair anxiously, as if she wanted nothing more than to go back to training her Pokemon. “I’m Kelly. We’ve been traveling with Dean and Rahul for a while now. I guess you know that, though.”

“Oh okay,” Alex said.

“Hey Alex,” Rahul said gleefully. “Look what I’ve got!” He held up the little booklet that held his three gym badges. “Three already!”

“Nice. Are you going to enter the Indigo Tournament?”

“Of course!” the big man yelled jubilantly. Ryan had no idea why Rahul had become so energetic all of the sudden. “You should enter, too.”

“Yeah. I know. Been too busy with PokeSmash, though.”

“What the heck is PokeSmash?!” asked Ryan.

“Are you kidding me?” Rahul roared. “A-are you kidding me, Ryan?! Really, you don’t know what PokeSmash is? How can you not know what PokeSmash is?!” Rahul laughed incredulously.

“Well, what is it?”

Before Rahul could respond, he decided to start a new conversation, as he oft does (what a guy). “Hey Alex, let’s battle. You and me, six on six. You better have your team with you.”

“I do,” the short Chinese adolescent replied.

“Awesome!” Rahul thrust his Sonic Screwdriver up, up, up, as if he was trying to color the sky. “Let’s do this!”

“Very well,” Alex said seriously. He turned to Dean. “You better get home. Mom’s been wondering where you’ve been. You’ll have a lot to tell her. Make sure to show her the Pokemon you caught, too.” Dean nodded. “Oh, and if I’m not home tonight, remember that after Mom and Dad and Tracey go to bed, you can wake up Robbie and Xiao Bao (aka Zach) and play Halo 7 with them. Just be sure to keep the volume off so no one wakes up. That is the only way you’ll be able to play Halo. I know it’s weird, since we have a Pokebox One and Halo 7, so we should be able to play the game, but Mom and Dad won’t let us play it ever unless we sneak up late at night to do so.”

Dean nodded and bowed. “Bye Alex! Good luck with the fight!” he said, before running off to his city and home. And that was the last time Ryan ever saw the kid, at least in person.

Alex turned back to face Rahul. “It’s been a while since we’ve dueled, Rahul. I’m sure we’re both a little rusty. I’m not sure I’ll be able to anticipate your moves that well.”

“Heh, Alex, my Pokemon are way stronger than they were last time. I even have a Magneton now. I’m soooooo going to win.”

Alex did a little spin move, his scarlet scarf twirling like something that twirls, and then did a somersault and a jump. It was all rather random and inexplicable. Ryan felt like he was watching performance art. The only thing that was missing was Alex cutting open a can of Spaghettios and pouring it all over himself. When the Chinese boy had had his fill of this, he stopped, caught his breath, and spoke, with all his conviction. “Were it so easy.”

Alex’s eyes narrowed (an impressive feat for someone with his eyes to begin with), and then threw a Pokeball at the space in between him and Rahul. Rahul patted his belly and stroked his syrup-crusted beard and then followed suit. The greatest battle of our time had just begun.

Episode 14: To Be A Rock And Not To Roll
“You better not take forever!” Rahul screamed. “Battle timer is on! Inactive players will be automatically lose the match!”

“What are you talking about?” Alex asked.

“I don’t want this to take forever. It’s my request,” replied Rahul proudly. He slapped his belly, and Ryan thought he had never looked more like a Snorlax than at that moment.

“Alright.”

Out went Alex’s Starmie from its Pokeball. Rahul’s Kadabra went flying out of his Pokeball as well.

“Whoa, Abra, look, it’s your papa!” Ryan proclaimed carelessly, patting his Abra on the head.

“Bra rah!” Abra grunted, his eyes moving back and forth with great suspicion. “Rah, rah, abra, abra rah! Bra, abra. Rah. Rah, abra, abra, rah, bra, abra! Abra!”

Luckily for us, no one knows how to translate Abra’s language.

“Alright Shuriken,” Alex said in a low rumble, “use Blizzard.”

“Thunder Wave!” Rahul roared like an Entei in heat.

Ryan watched as the Starmie’s attack missed, and the Kadabra’s attack hit, paralyzing the Starmie.

“Ah, RNGesus,” Alex said and no one paid attention to what he said. It was great.

“Thunder Punch,” Rahul stated calmly.

“Blizzard again!”

This time, both attacks hit, dealing a multitude of damage to both Pokemon. Ryan wondered who would die first. It was truly suspenseful. He grabbed a bucket of popcorn from his backpack and started munching on it hastily.

“Whoa, who do you think will win?” he asked Kelly, who was standing nearby.

“Rahul has only three badges,” Kelly reminded Ryan. “I’m not sure he can win. His Pokemon probably aren’t at high enough levels.”

“Come on Kelly, believe in the big man. Rahul is awesome. Plus we have no idea what his full team is, since we’ve never seen him do a battle like this. In fact, we don’t know pretty much anything about him ‘cept he’s awesome.”

And Kelly, bless her pink hair, could not offer any counter to such a logical statement.

“Shuriken return!” Alex said, throwing a different Pokeball. “Go, Mahogany!”

“Thunder Punch!” screamed Rahul.

The aforementioned Thunder Punch hit Mahogany, who Ryan’s Pokedex told him was an Exeggutor. The attack did very little damage, though it did paralyze the poor plant-egg-thing. Who the heck would make a Pokemon look like that? You would have to drink an insane amount of orange juice to think that eggs evolve into a palm tree. I mean seriously, it was one of the first 151 Pokemon and you’re telling me that they already ran out of interesting ideas for Pokemon? This guy looks like he should be coming from the 600s at the very least. Someone probably just gave the Pokemon creators a bunch of eggs, and their first thought was that eggs become palm trees, and I don’t know why anyone would think that.

Seeing his attack missed, Rahul became distressed. “Kadabra, return! Go Dragonair!”

“Sleep Powder!” Alex ordered Mahogany.

“Dragonair, use Toxic!” Rahul commanded.

The attack failed, yet somehow Mahogany was still paralyzed. Amazing how Pokemon physics work sometimes, especially in gen 1. Mahogany, the poor guy, was unable to follow up with an attack of his own. Dragonair then used an Ice Beam, which was super effective to the palm tree wannabe, and Mahogany once again used the Sleep Powder move. Dragonair fell asleep, bless its heart, but woke up the very next turn after taking a devastating Psychic attack! Wow, what a move! Alex twirled when he saw the attack hit, so sure was he that victory was in his grasp. He almost busted out the yo-yos at that point. Almost.

“Come back, Mahogany!” Alex ordered. “Go Incinerator!”

A Charmeleon went flying out into the battlefield, only to be met by an Ice Beam. Due to the undeniable power of the old gods of Alex’s homeland, Incinerator managed to survive the devastating hit.

“Body Slam!” grunted Alex. The attack did decent damage to the Dragonair, though it was nothing to write home about.

“Surf!” ordered Rahul. Somehow, the Surf attack, despite being even more devastating than the Ice Beam attack, didn’t take out the Charmeleon. “Wait, how is he not knocked out?!” Rahul yelled. “Surf should easily take out a Fire Pokemon! Are you kidding me?!”

No one said a thing to him, though Ryan reflexively patted his own belly.

“What do you think?” Ryan asked Kelly.

“Alex is by far the superior trainer. His Pokemon are stronger, and he’s spent more time with them, learning their movesets and styles,” she noted. “Rahul has only three badges. He’s not experienced enough. This Alex kid is a far smarter trainer too, and he’s outplaying Rahul. It’s not just that his Pokemon are stronger, but his strategy is far better than Rahul’s. He’s anticipating Rahul’s moves, whereas Rahul isn’t capable of such advanced thinking.”

“I bet that’s because they know each other!” Ryan chimed in.

Kelly shook her head, annoyed. “You could learn a lot from Alex.”

“So could you!”

“I have seven badges, and I’m about to get my eighth,” the pink-haired girl contended. “I’m far better at this than any of you three.”

“Oh yeah? I bet I could beat you right now! What do you think, Abra?”

“Bra.”

“Darn right!” Ryan replied.

“Please, there’s no way I’m going to fight you. I’ll leave you here before that happens.”

“B-but why?!” Ryan’s face fell.

“There’s already a battle going on. It’s too difficult for the readers to keep track of two battles going on at once. Plus, I need my Pokemon healthy for the trek through Viridian Forest.”

“Curses!” Ryan said, shaking his fist at the sky, causing Abra to fall off of him. As he looked down and saw Abra lying in the grass, the weeds around him, Ryan thought that the little Pokemon looked just like Santa Claus, and that made him feel okay again.

Regardless, back in the actual battle, Rahul used Surf again, causing Incinerator to faint. It was a crucial knockout, Ryan thought. Since Rahul got the first knockout, the good Ryan thought that there was no way the big man could lose now. He felt like busting out the sparklers for such a momentous occasion. His good friend with the goatee of a god was about to win.

Alex sent out Shuriken again, who was met with a devastating Thunderbolt attack. It was super effective, wow! But, Shuriken had a card up its sleeve as well - the oft used Blizzard. This time, the attack hit, and Dragonair fainted. A stunning turn of events in Ryan’s eyes! But then, Rahul brought back out his Kadabra, who used Thunder Punch again. This time, Shuriken the Starmie was dealt with and bam, bam, bam, it fainted. Ryan thought he saw a tear come to Alex’s eye then, for Starmie is one of his most favorite Pokemon ever. Then, Alex took out his Tauros, whom he called Robbie Jr., (“Hey, I have one of those!” Ryan told Kelly, who seemed to not hear him) and wrecked the Kadabra with a Hyper Beam like a durian in a meat shredder. At that point, Rahul took out his Lapras, a Pokemon Ryan had never seen nor heard of before, and had Dexy not confirmed it to be a real Pokemon, Ryan would not have believed his eyes. It was crazy how there were Pokemon in his own region that Ryan did not immediately recognize, but he dared not tell Kelly this, for she would have only called him stupid again had he revealed that fact to her, and he didn’t like her when she was being mean to him.

Then, Alex sent out his Jolteon, named Snuggly (and this made Ryan think that perhaps Alex is a fairy, but more on that in chapter 23). This scared the heck out of Rahul, who squealed, jumped up in the air, and stroked his beard ferociously, before withdrawing Lapras, and sending out his Rhyhorn. However, Alex seemed to have anticipated this, for he had his Snuggly-pooh use Double Kick instead of the expected electric attack. It was incredible! A super effective attack! Wow!

Rahul ordered his Rhyhorn to use Earthquake, but Alex withdrew his Snuggly and sent Mahogany the palm tree out again.

“Don’t let your eggs get cracked!” Ryan shouted to much fanfare from Abra. Neither Alex nor Rahul seemed to hear him, as the two were busy twirling and grunting about like a couple of circus bears on lunch break.

What happened next still haunts Rahul to this day. If one brings up the next battle, Rahul will throw curry at them or try to end the Skype call faster than Roger Goodell can play the xylophone (that dude can play the spoons like it’s nobody’s business - he’s like a centipede who’s eaten a couple hard candies). Suffice to say, the next battle did happen, regardless of Rahul’s feelings about it, and though one must cry oneself to sleep just thinking about it, the fight must still be documented for posterity’s sake. Rahul then switched out his Rhyhorn for his Magneton, his most treasured Pokemon, and one he actually thinks is a good Pokemon in gen 1 physics. Mahogany used Mega Drain then, to which Rahul’s Magneton had no answer. Then Mahogany did it again (Alex is a classic spammer, which is also seen with his younger brothers when they like to spam Meta Knight against me, and I will never forgive Zach and Robbie Sr. for doing so (this is why Dean is my favorite to this day)). Then, Magneton tried to use Supersonic, but the attack missed. Rahul must’ve nearly ripped off his wife-beater at that turn of events. Then Mahogany put the big man’s Magneton to sleep with Sleep Powder. Stunning finish I say, as any soccer commentator would say. The Mahogany used Mega Drain and Psychic for good measure, nearly wiping Magneton, Rahul’s prized Pokemon, off of the face of the Kanto region.

“Oh my god,” Rahul said in disgust. “How is this happening?”

Then Magneton woke up. It used a Thunder, which though it paralyzed the Exeggutor, was not a very effective attack.

“Gotta use Mega Drain again,” Alex said outloud. “Spam, spam, spam, yo. Gotta make my brothers proud.”

“Gotta go faster, faster,” Ryan sang tunelessly in response. Abra barked at him for such an atrocious showing, and the boy blushed and didn’t sing no more, no more.

Rahul didn’t seem to learn from his last attack and used Thunder again. It wasn’t super effective this time either, wow! And Mahogany used another Mega Drain. Sadly, for all of us readers, Mahogany was paralyzed by this attack, which prolonged this fight by at least two turns.

“Man, this is horrible,” Ryan commented. “They are just using the same attacks over and over again. What the heck? I didn’t pay to see none of this jive nonsense!” The boy threw his popcorn down in disgust. Abra, shocked by Ryan’s wanton mishandling of the popcorn, teleported to the ground and grabbed a couple of pieces before teleporting back to his master’s shoulder.

Rahul tried to use the non-effective Thunder again. But his Magneton’s attack missed. Then, Mahogany’s move finally went through, and surprise, surprise it was another Mega Drain. Everyone applaud this masterful effort, please, for Magneton was at last dealt with, and this long, horrible, boring battle was mercifully brought to an end. Praise Gooby.

“Go Charizard,” Rahul said.

“Return, Mahogany,” Alex replied. “Go Meteor,” the boy said, sending out his powerful Golem.

“Fire Blast,” Rahul ordered his Charizard.

But the attack was not very effective, alas. This fight just won’t end, Ryan thought. Six vs. six is a long, long battle. It takes forever and ever and ever and man we’re like 1600 words in, and turns like this are not helping.

“Charizard, Fly!”

“Rock Slide, Meteor!”

Alas again, the Rock Slide attack missed, prolonging this fight further. Ryan looked at the non-existent watch on his left hand. “Hey, do you want to go to Viridian City now?” he asked Kelly.

“We could,” Kelly said cautiously, “but Rahul will whine and chase us down and it’ll be horrible if we leave. Besides, the fight is almost over. Rahul is definitely losing.”

“But he’s such a guy…” Ryan muttered sadly. “I always want him to do good because he’s so nice to me and has some rocking facial hair. But he does bring this upon himself.”

As all of that was irrelevant, Kelly did not reply.

Then, Charizard used a Fly attack again. As expected, it wasn’t very effective. It was as if Rahul didn’t know which moves were effective against his opponent’s Pokemon. Then, Meteor used Rock Slide again, and this time, through the power of magic, the Charizard was knocked unconscious! Such a super attack. Ryan nearly cried it was so beautiful to watch the Charizard get taken out by a single attack.

“Go Rhyhorn!” said Rahul, throwing another Pokeball.

“Earthquake, Meteor!” Alex commanded.

The Earthquake took out Rhyhorn in a single attack. Even Abra jumped and shouted in with pleasure at this. Popcorn ran down his face in buttery chunks, so hysterical was the little Pokemon. Ryan had to calm him down and remind Abra that this was just a game, that this was just a Pokemon battle. It wasn’t real life, no matter how much Alex and Rahul wanted it to be.

Rahul remained calm, even in the face of sure defeat. “Go Lapras! Use Ice Beam!”

The Golem absorbed the attack before he could render an attack of his own, and fainted from the sheer power of it.

“Go Snuggly!” Alex shouted. “Let’s end this.”

“Bra, abra, rah, rah, rah!” Abra shouted. Clearly, he wanted this fight to end too. Like any good game of monopoly, this fight had been over after about five minutes in, and the slow defeat of Rahul had been quite a painful sight up to this point. Had Abra not had some popcorn to munch on, he might have not been so amiable, and Ryan could not blame him.

“Thunderbolt!” Alex shouted.

“Surf!”

Only the Thunderbolt was super effective, as is expected. But Lapras didn’t die. Rahul got a glint in his eye. “I’m going to win this,” he declared. “I’m feel incredible! I feel great! I can do this!”

“Thunderbolt,” replied Alex, simply.

Before Rahul could even order his own Pokemon to do another move, the Jolteon sprung forward, shot a Thunderbolt at Rahul’s last Pokemon, and in a flash of light, the poor Lapras fell over, unconscious. The battle was over. Ryan clapped, but he was the only one to show such support.

“Dang, I want a rematch!” Rahul declared, grabbing some of his Pokeballs and fondling them furiously.

Alex smirked and jumped off of the rock he was standing on. “Were it so easy.”

“Come ooooooooooooooon,” Rahul said in a long whine. “Best two out of three.”

“Your Pokemon are unconscious,” Alex reminded him, “and a few of mine are too. You need to get them to a PokeCenter before we battle again.”

“I probably have a bunch of revives in here somewhere,” Rahul responded, feeling through his man-purse for all of his Pokemon items. He found one or two revives, but not nearly enough for himself, let alone Alex, who did not seem to have any revives (though he probably did, knowing Alex, but he didn’t want to say so, so that he wouldn’t have to waste any more time beating Rahul again).

“Oh well,” replied Alex. “I guess we’ve got to go to Viridian City.”

“Yes,” Kelly said, stepping forward. “We better get going. It’s getting pretty late.”

“But we have to go through the dreaded Viridian Forest!” Ryan said, dismayed. “And Alex and Rahul don’t have many Pokemon. Are we going to make it through?”

“It’s no problem,” Alex said. “The Pokemon in Viridian Forest aren’t very powerful.”

“But, but, but,” Ryan stammered, “the Viridian City Gym is the best Gym in all of Kanto! Why would its forest have all of the weakest Pokemon?”

“Because, this is where most Pokemon Trainers start their journeys,” Alex replied. “Well, you are expected to start your journey in Pallet Town.”

“I didn’t,” grunted Rahul. “And I already have three badges. Ryan has three badges too, and he didn’t start in Pallet Town.”

“Alright,” said Alex. “But you were supposed to.”

Ryan felt his sass mouth coming to him and had to hold back a wee bit. “Hey, I wasn’t born in Pallet Town! It’s not fair that I should have to start there! I started my journey where I was born, and so did Rahul! That should be good enough for you, Yo-Yo Ma!”

Kelly crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. “Can you guys continue this stupid conversation on the way to Viridian City? I’ve got places to be.”

“Yeah, let’s go!” Ryan shouted, nearly causing Abra to fall off of his shoulder.

Rahul agreed and nodded his head vigorously, like a wet dog. “Hey Alex, why don’t you come with us? Come on, Alex, come oooooooooooooon. You know you want to.”

After a dramatic pause, Alex said, “Alright.”

“Awesome!” Rahul said. He roared like a dinosaur. He clapped his hands jubilantly, as if he didn’t remember just getting his Pokeballs served to him by Alex. At once, two women came running out of the bushes and presented Rahul with a plate of steaming hot curry and rice. Rahul grunted in approval, the sweat on his brow serving as an indication of how much he desired his food. Even Ryan felt his mouth watering. Abra, who was munching away on the last remnants of Ryan’s popcorn, didn’t seem to mind though.

“Alright, everyone, let’s go!” Ryan shouted, punching the sky. “Let’s go through Viridian Forest and get Kelly to her last Gym Battle!”

Ryan tried to sound encouraging and happy, but in truth, he was anything but. He didn’t feel funky funky fresh whatsoever. In fact, the blue-haired novice of a trainer was quite sad - almost as sad as when he had to depart with the Scyther but a few chapters ago. Ryan knew that he and Kelly were about to part ways, and he was not ready for such a thing. He liked Kelly, despite the way they interacted with one another; she had been with him near the start of his journey. He couldn’t imagine going on without her. And yet, he would have to. There was nothing to do about it. He couldn’t make her come with him to the other gyms, since she wouldn’t need to fight those gym leaders herself. Kelly would be better off spending her time training her Pokemon for the Indigo League Tournament. And he couldn’t tell her how he felt. So instead, Ryan led the group into the Viridian Forest, as if it was not, indeed, to their doom.

From behind the four trainers, a man peeked out from the bushes. He was nigh bald, except for several long strands of hair sprouting out from the sides of his head, falling in ragged blond strands down the back of his neck. The man was wearing a dark black leather jacket and black jeans. He was sporting a pair of binoculars around his neck, as lit as as a rusty fishing rod. He had a fearsome, slightly-wrinkled forehead, with pinkish skin, and the face of a man who looked like he had just shaved off a beard. The man grasped his binoculars and looked at the four children walking into the Viridian Forest ahead of him.

“They’re going into the Viridian Forest. That’s where the Dragonrider is. They must be in league with him. It’s a conspiracy!” he whispered to himself. “Ha, I should know. I was a governor, a fighter, a Navy SEAL. Think I don’t know what’s going on? Think I won’t put a stop to this? Think again.”

With that, the almost-bald man who looked like his face was carved out of buttered marble, stood up, and ran after Ryan and the gang. And as he went, one could hear the man whispering, “Mind control!” to himself over and over again.

Episode 15: Carry That Weight
“So why didn’t you become a trainer?” Ryan asked Alex as the group walked into Viridian Forest.

“I don’t know. Smash, probably.”

“Are you going to become a professional Super Smash Bros. Pokemon player instead?”

“Alright,” replied Alex.

“Okay, cool.” Ryan was perplexed by this boy’s speech, but he nonetheless went with it. “So you have a pretty great team, huh?”

Alex nodded his beautiful little Asian face. Ryan didn’t even think it looked whiny one bit. “Yeah, I was born to be a winner.”

“Do you want to be the best, like no one ever was?” Ryan asked, his eyes wide as dalmations.

“Don’t ever say that to me,” Alex scowled. He whipped his yo-yos back and forth. He whipped his yo-yos back and forth. “I am born to be a winner, hands down. Not what you said. That’s just dumb.”

This bizarre, cringeworthy behavior would surely be regretted by Alex in about five years, Ryan knew, but he said nothing about that. “Well, can you train me? I wanna get better!” He looked over at Kelly, who was talking with Rahul about how many poppers Rahul could eat in one minute. “I wanna be the best there ever was.”

“Yeah, alright,” Alex said in a very deep voice - perhaps too deep for someone his size. “Once we get to Viridian City, I’ve gotta brb dishes, but afterwards, I can show you the book I’ve been putting together. Rahul wanted to look at it too.”

“Huh? A book?”

“I’ve been taking notes on the best Pokemon and how to use them,” Alex explained. “Despite people using Pokemon for battle for years, only I have been able to find these secret strategies. It’s not widespread information. I won’t be telling very many people. I’m the only one in the world, pretty much, who knows which Pokemon are the best.”

“Woohoo!” Ryan shouted, punching the air. “I’m gonna be a part of the 1%!”

From up ahead, a Growlithe sprung from the bushes and came running over to the group. Riding him was a small Asian man with stark white flowing hair, a fine black-and-white suit with a red tie, and a dazed grin on his face. “1% solar diminishing is nothing to write home about,” the man explained to the group, who stopped as his Growlithe started prancing about in front of them. “But look, an Alien Megastructure,” the man said amiably, pointing to a hive of Kakuna perched on a nearby tree. "Truly spectacular! That is off-scale! 15-22% diminishing light return. Remarkable! We’ve finally made contact.”

“What are you going on about, old man?” Kelly asked him, annoyance high in her voice.

“Uahhhahahahhh, hi… you’re assaulting me!” the man said, almost falling off his Growlithe. He seemed startled that there was anyone there to speak to him.

Kelly raised an eyebrow. “You’re the one who came out of the bushes to come over to us.”

“Ah yes, bits of matter and antimatter are 100% efficient when they touch one another.”

“Well, who are you?” Rahul asked him, his hands flailing into the air like some blow-up clown at a car dealership.

“Hello. I am Dr. Michio Kaku,” the small man said happily, “professor of theoretical physicist at Smogon University.”

“Yeah, but how is that relevant?” asked Ryan.

“Well, theoretically, we are all in the Viridian Forest,” Dr. Kaku pointed out. “And Einstein liked to play the violin. Me, I like to ice skate.”

“Are you gonna lead us to Viridian City?” Kelly asked.

“If you want,” Dr. Kaku said. “Okay, let’s go. And we’re off! Welcome to the Dr. Kaku theoretical tour of the most dangerous forest in the physical world.”

And thus, the four were off, Dr. Kaku’s Growlithe leading them. As they went, they stared at the old man who seemed so oblivious to everything around him. He pointed this way and that, remarking on the crazy things he was seeing. “Ah yes, some scientists are saying that dark matter hides in bushes,” he said to the four trainers. “It is a new and exciting age of discovery.”

“We should ditch this guy,” Rahul put forth.

Kelly shook her head. “No, we need to get through this forest as quickly as possible. If he leads us out, it’s worth it.”

So the trainers did not ditch poor Kaku-san. They kept going along at a brisk pace until they came to a clearing in the trees, where a group of people were lying on the ground ahead of them. Every one of them held a bug catching net in their hands, and they were all lying on the ground, appearing dazed. Several of them had Pokemon knocked unconscious next to them. Upon seeing this, everyone ran over to the group of bug catchers, sans Kaku-kun who continued along at his regular pace, seemingly not seeing what Ryan, Kelly, Rahul, and Alex had seen. He began humming tunelessly to himself and would occasionally say, “At the present time, we are really clueless as to what natural phenomenon causes comets the size of Jupiter to migrate west for the winter.”

Ryan ran up to the nearest trainer, who was covered in bruises and scrapes and asked, “What happened?”

“Oh… it was terrible..” the bug catcher gasped. “A-a-a… d-demon… he took all of us out. He’s was riding on a dragon…”

“No it wasn’t… a d-dragon,” another fallen bug catcher replied. “It… it was Gojira!!!”

“Gojira..” an old bug catcher murmured as he held a lit lighter to his face, “Gojira…”

“I think it was a new kind of Pokemon,” another croaked.

“No, definitely not,” a fourth argued.

“Alright, so he was riding on a dragon or he wasn’t. But why did he attack you?” Ryan questioned the bug catchers.

“H-he… challenged us to a fight…” one said. “But we… we only h-had Metapods. We stood no chance. It was a massacre...”

“I-I had a Weedle,” one pointed out. “I named him Mr. Weddle.”

“We were no match for his awesome power!”

“But why were you all standing out here in the wilderness if all you had were Metapods?”

One shrugged and then fell over into a ditch. “We’re bug catchers. We’re supposed to just stand out here and let guys battle us even though we don’t have Pokemon with any offensive moves.”

“Metapod used Harden!” Rahul laughed, and then raised his hand to high five Alex, but Alex didn’t return the gesture because he was too busy not paying attention.

“Don’t worry,” Ryan said, feeling his Pokeballs in his backpack. “I’ve got a great team of Pokemon! I’ll find this Dragonrider and take him out!”

“Bless your sole, wee lad,” said a tiny bug catcher lying in a puddle who could have been no older than thirty-five. “Godspeed and thanks for all the fish.”

Alas, Ryan had not a Magikarp to give. With that, all of the bug catchers fell over again in exhaustion and defeat. Ryan noticed a Spearow sitting on a rock nearby. Annoyed, the teal-haired boy threw a rock at the bird, causing it to squawk and fly off into the forest.

Dr. Kaku came trotting by then, and suddenly shot off his Growlithe like a bullet into the tall grass. A Caterpie rose up and screeched as if it was going to attack him, causing Michio to run screaming back to his Growlithe. The loyal Growlithe easily took care of the Caterpie with a breath of flame. Once he was back on his Growlithe, Michio Kaku held up a little piece of candy in a blue wrapper. “Rare candy,” he laughed. “Bottoms up!”

With that, Dr. Kaku ate the rare candy. A white light seemed to encapsulate him, and he began to rise in the air for a second. And then, the good doctor descended from the heavens back down onto his Growlithe. “Yes,” he began, “this is most fortuitous. Einstein once called rare candy the lowest octave of the symphony of String Theory. Ah yes, that appears to be correct. I will have to travel to the nearest black hole to tell him.”

“Look old man, can’t you just lead us through this forest or not?” Kelly asked him, stomping her foot. “I don’t have time for your cockamamie nonsense.”

“Auahaha! The cookie people are coming for me!” Dr. Kaku nearly fell of his Growlithe again, but his Pokemon, apparently well-aware of Michio’s penchant for falling off of him, caught him at the last second. With that, Michio Kaku laughed. “I almost found dark energy once when I was in the Baja.”

“Who said… the Baja?” asked a cool voice. At once, a large bald man with the remnants of blond hair trailing down the back of his scalp jumped out from behind a tree. “I used to live down in the Baja, not a computer within twenty miles of me. That way the government couldn’t track me, see. I was a governor, a fighter, a Navy SEAL, and I still wasn’t allowed to have a computer! Jet fuel can’t melt steel beams.”

“Ah yes,” Michio Kaku replied with a smile. “Jet fuel can’t melt steel beams. That is indeed true.”

“It’s a conspiracy. The HAARP system is trying to take us over with mind control! Mind control!” the man replied.

“What the heck is going on?!” Kelly shouted, causing the very trees around to shake. Pidgeys took the sky, and Kakunas began to evolve into Beedrills so mighty was Kelly’s scream. It made Ryan feel good in the pit of his stomach to see her do that. “I just want to get to Viridian City!!!”

“Heh, whoa, hold on there kiddo,” the bald man said, rubbing his black leather jacket with one of his hands. “I’m the governor, Jesse Ventura, and I know a thing or two about conspiracies. The dragonrider is a Pokemon conspiracy,” he explained. “And I’ve tracked him to this forest. Like the bigfoot or the yeti or the Baja Bobo, he is a mythical creature.”

“Ah, but the Dragonrider is a mere Pokemon trainer,” said Dr. Kaku. “Everything you say is wrong.”

“Nonsense!” grumbled Jesse. “I was a former Pokemon SEAL. Ha! I should know. Are you going to tell me that there’s a dragon Pokemon? Ha! Think again. There’s no such thing. Whoever this Dragonrider is, I’m sure he’s using thermite paint to beat up on these poor helpless people,” Jesse “The Body” Ventura replied, pointing at the hapless bug catchers. “It’s an inside job!”

“Please,” Michio Kaku laughed. “Thermite paint is just the wallpaper of the new computer technology that will let you put anything you want on your cyber walls in 10-15 years with no repercussions. If you want to throw spaghetti at the walls, now you can with virtual spaghetti on your computer wallpaper! What is really intriguing is that the positrional force of these walls will release anti-neutrinos for Pokehavesting,” the theoretical theorist explained. “What an age to live in!”

“It’s a conspiracy! I’m going to find that Dragonrider! I bet it’s a government drone! I’d bet my tv show on it.”

“Actually… it was a kid with brown hair and green eyes riding on a dragon,” one of the bug catchers replied, but Jesse “The Body” Ventura didn’t have time for that jive turkey.

“Be sure to eat any rare candy you come upon,” Dr. Kaku advised Jesse. “You will need several bushels of them.”

Jesse just brushed him off and ran into the bushes. However, as he got to the bushes, he grabbed a random berry and ate it right then and there, perhaps assuming it was a rare candy. The man proceeded to make a sour face, as if he had just swallowed a salty penny, and then ran off in embarrassment.

“Ah, it looks like the tall American man ate a poisonous berry,” Dr. Kaku said. “Very good. He will most certainly die within 48 hours. Now let’s get to Viridian City.”

“Yeah, and let’s find this Dragonrider!” Ryan replied. “Maybe if I beat him, I can have his dragon. I’ve always wanted a dragon!”

“Idiot, you can’t steal someone else’s Pokemon,” Kelly replied. “Besides, when your Dragonair evolves, it’ll be a Dragonite, and Dragonite is a Dragon-type Pokemon.”

Ryan blushed. “Yeah… I knew that!”

From Ryan’s pocket, his Pokedex said, “Not true master, I have never told you that before, and anything I have not told you, you do not know.”

“Shut up, Dexy!” Ryan whispered, hoping that Kelly hadn’t heard the errant device babbling. She didn’t appear to.

The rest of the trip through Viridian Forest went with little incident. One time, Ryan thought he saw a boy in a Samurai outfit running about with a Pinsir chasing him, but perhaps that was merely a mirage. At one point, Rahul woke a hive of Beedrills when he complained about not getting powdered sugar for his breakfast pancakes. At that point, Ryan and Kelly had sent forth their fire Pokemon to quell the tide. Ryan was very satisfied with Aegon the Charmeleon for cooking up all of those Beedrills to a crisp (Rahul had complained that the burning of the Beedrills had roused a hunger in him for some fried chicken, and he had no fried chicken) and he was glad Matata wasn’t around to see such devastation. At the conclusion of the fight, however, Aegon had refused to go back in his ball, seemingly angry that Abra got to stay out of his Pokeball (the sweet lad was perched on Ryan’s shoulder like a pirate’s parrot), so Ryan was forced to leave his disloyal Charmeleon out.

“Fine,” he said. “But don’t do anything bad and don’t set the forest on fire.”

“Yes, we are a type 0 society,” Dr. Kaku said, “because we can only harvest energy from dead plants such as these.”

“I want to harvest your brain for Rahul,” Alex said so quietly that Ryan barely heard him.

And even our blue-haired protagonist had to laugh at that.

There was no sign of the Dragonrider, and indeed, no sign of Jesse Ventura for the rest of the trip. Ryan had tried catching a Caterpie, since he wanted a Butterfree, but Alex had advised him against it, since Butterfree is a useless Pokemon. As they came to the edge of the forest, the sprawling expanse of Viridian City came into view.

“Finally!” Kelly shouted, dropping to her knees. There seemed to be tears in her eyes. “I thought we’d never make it after all that nonsense before.”

“Never fear,” said Michio Kaku. “If I travel at nearly the speed of light, I will age less than you. On the next trip to Viridian City, I will go so fast, I will age only a few minutes, while you will age several years,” he said with a long smile. “Ah that would be wonderful. And if we took the trip enough times you would eventually be older than me. I am looking forward to that day when you are even older than me.”

“Dude, shut up. You’re as uncool as Saint Elmo’s fire!” Kelly yelled. “Now that we’re here, you need to go back to wherever you came from. I don’t want you following us anymore.”

“Uahahahahaahah, don’t hit me with a brick!” Michio Kaku screamed, nearly falling off his Growlithe.

But instead of responding, Kelly walked furiously off towards the city. This puzzled Ryan, and he noticed that Alex and Rahul were also standing there with wide eyes.

He turned to his Pokemon. “What do you think guys? Should we leave Dr. Kaku here?”

“Meleon,” Aegon hissed, breathing a wisp of flames. He crossed his arms and looked away from Ryan.

“Dang, he’s giving me the sass mouth!” Ryan despaired. “Abra, help!”

“Bra.”

“You too, huh?”

“Rah.”

“Dang.” Ryan looked at the other two boys. “Well I guess we should go then.”

“Yeah, let’s go,” Alex said gruffly.

“To Viridian City!” said Rahul heroically, holding up his Doctor Who screwdriver. “Never cruel nor cowardly, never give up, never give in! I will lead us to safety!”

And thus the three boys ran off after Kelly.

Behind them, Dr. Michio Kaku watched them. “Don’t forget… jet fuel can’t melt steel beams. Oh, no, no, no. But, it can loosen up the metal just enough to make the building collapse. Ah yes, I am a genius. Now let’s go find that Alien Superstructure I saw before. Come on, Lil Jimmy, let’s go!”

Pity Jesse the Ventriloquist wasn’t there to hear him. With that, Dr. Kaku spurred his Growlithe around and the two raced off into Viridian Forest at near light speed, where many powerful monsters (levels 4-6) awaited them.

Alex had gone home to fulfill his destiny to do the dishes. Rahul was out looking for food and Doctor Who DVDs and girls (and perhaps not in that order). That left just Ryan and Kelly alone in the streets of Viridian City.

It was evening in Viridian City, and the activity of the people in it was rather muted, with few people still out and about. The two stood in front of the city’s Gym, its great imposing archway looking down upon them like the small creatures they were. Neither spoke for a long time.

“Don’t you want to train your Pokemon some more before going in?” Ryan asked her, finally breaking the silence. Abra was on his shoulder, and Charmeleon was holding his hand like a little lost child. “Come on, just a few more days of training!”

“No, I think I’m ready,” Kelly replied. She shrugged, “And even if I lose, I can train my Pokemon afterwards.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Kelly turned to Ryan, who bowed his head so as to not look her in the eyes. “You’re an inexperienced trainer, Ryan.” She touched his shoulder. “But, you’ll get better. And I’m sure when we meet again in the Indigo League Tournament, you’ll be a real match for me.” He did not respond. The pink-haired girl removed her hand from his shoulder. “You better hurry and get those last five badges. Time’s running out.” He nodded, but still kept his eyes trained on the floor. “Okay then, well I guess I better get going. See ya later!”

“Yeah, see you…”

Ryan turned away and closed his eyes. He bit his lip.

“Oh and Ryan,” Kelly’s voice called from behind him.

“Yeah?”

“It wasn’t that bad traveling with you. Really, I had fun,” she said. Ryan turned and met her eyes. They looked like painted roses in the light of the dying sun. “When this is all over, let’s go on another adventure together, okay?”

“Yeah… sounds good…” Ryan replied. He felt numb, his voice sounded small, and he didn’t know what else to say.

There was nothing else he could have said, though, for at that moment, Kelly turned back around and strode confidently into the Viridian City Gym, a Pokeball already in her hand. She’s ready to win, he thought as he watched her go. I wish I was too.

“Come on guys, let’s go,” the blue-haired boy mumbled to his Abra and Charmeleon.

Abra, nearly asleep on Ryan’s shoulder let out a sleepy, “Abra!” Ryan gave him a good couple scratches behind the ear for that one.

“Charmeleon Leon meeeeel!” Aegon protested. He tried to shake off Ryan’s hand and run off, but Ryan held on firmly.

“Whoa now, boy, don’t you leave me too! Come on, let’s go!” And when Charmeleon simply growled and didn’t budge, Ryan took out Aegon’s Pokeball and held it in front of his snout. “If you don’t want to go back inside, you better listen to me, Aegon!”

And that, it seemed, did the trick, for fear danced across Aegon’s eyes like flames of wildfire, and he decided that he would rather obey his master than go back in the Pokeball. So off they went, together, Ryan and two of his favorite buddies, and nothing was the matter, no sir.

Later, Ryan reunited with Rahul and Alex, who were intent on setting out for Pewter City, the location of the next gym, that very night. He couldn’t object. He didn’t want to stay in Viridian City a moment longer. Not until I’m ready to fight this city’s Gym Leader.

So after they healed their Pokemon at the local PokeCenter and bought some goodies from the local PokeMart (Ryan bought some Kiwis, while Rahul bought some deep fried cupcakes and unsuccessfully tried to hit on the cashier (he tried to impress her by telling her he was a brony, which didn’t impress her at all), and Alex, the poor bloke (cuz he’s gonna be a teacher when he grows up) couldn’t afford to buy a single thing). Then, they packed their bags and headed out towards Pewter City.

“So Kelly’s gone?” Rahul asked.

“Yep,” Ryan replied.

“Well at least we can move faster now,” Alex grunted. “Since she’s a girl.”

Ryan tugged on Aegon’s hand and led him forward to the edge of the city, Alex and Rahul not far behind. There, they witnessed a most peculiar sight.

Out from the forest behind the road, a boy with brown hair, green eyes, and a white shirt came strolling out on the back of a magnificent Porygon, as noble as any destrier Ryan had ever beheld at Summerhall in his youth. The other boy did not at first notice the three travelers, and as he dismounted, he spoke with cool wit:

“Nice work, Dragonmaster. We got those fakers.”

“Dragonmaster?!” Ryan suddenly shouted. The other boy looked up and they locked eyes. Ryan instantly remembered him as Charlie - the boy he met in the Pallet Town Diner not but a few chapters before. “You!” he shouted, running forward, Aegon mercilessly in tow. “You’re the one who defeated all of those bug catchers! You’re the Dragonrider!”

The boy just smirked and raised his arm in the air before dabbing with magnificent grace. It was like he had just lost the final round of a debate tournament or something.

Before Charlie could speak, however, another person emerged from the bushes. Nay, it was no bandit nor any wild Pokemon spoiling for a hopeless fight. It was, in fact, the balding former governor of Minnesota, who was also once a professional wrestler. In all black he stood, his meager strands of hair connected to the back of his scalp waving in the breeze. There he was: Jesse Ventura - the governor, the fighter, the Navy SEAL.

“I’ve found you, Dragonrider!” he screamed, his eyes two beady flecks of tar, his mouth foaming like someone had just poured hydrogen peroxide down Rosie O’Donnell’s throat. “Now you’re mine.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” the brown-haired boy said, taking a step back. Ryan realized that Charlie no longer had an accent, which was strange, since the last time they had met, he had been sure the kid had had a southern twang to his speech. Maybe he lost his accent, though. Those are easy to lose.

“I was a governor, a fighter, a Navy SEAL,” Jesse said. “And I know you’re part of the conspiracy, man. That dragon of yours is covered in thermite paint!”

“Yeah, I painted him myself,” Charlie replied, looking at Dragonmaster. “Do you like how he looks?”

“He could blow at any moment! He could bring the towers down!” Jesse looked horrified. “Think I won’t deal with this? I’m a former governor! It’s my duty to protect the innocent! Give me your dragon. Are you really gonna refuse a former governor?”

“Yeah… man, I’m not doing that.”

“Then it’s a battle!” Jesse took a Pokeball off of his belt. “And this former Navy SEAL ain’t laying down so easily. If you think your mind control’s gonna work on a former fighter, heh, think again!”

“Alright dude, whatever,” Charlie replied nonchalantly. “Let’s destroy this guy, Dragonmaster.”

“What did we just walk into?” Ryan asked the others.

“I don’t know, but whatever it is, it isn’t good. That kid could be a real problem,” Alex grunted.

“Whoo, go Dragonmaster!” screamed Rahul, waving a chicken wing to the sky.

And so, a great battle, perhaps not as great as the battle between Rahul and Alex, but still pretty great, began. This fight would decide the fate of the universe and Jesse’s quest to find the thermite paint. As Michio Kaku would say, “Our grandkids will lead the lives of the gods of mythology. Zeus could think and move objects around. We'll have that power. Venus had a perfect, timeless body. We'll have that, too. Pegasus was a flying horse. We'll be able to modify life in the future.” I don’t know what he was smoking, but I want some of it. It’s a shame he wasn’t here to give us any.

Episode 16: The Chapter with a Bunch of Foreshadowing
“I was a fighter, a governor, a NAVY seal!” Jesse Ventura declared randomly as he threw his Pokeball. Out from it popped a Primeape, ready for battle. It was squat and round like a cheese puff, and Ryan thought it reminded him of Jesse himself, minus, of course, the hair. Poor Jesse had but a few tattered strands of blond hair growing out of the back of his head like bleached moss.

“Yeah mayne,” Charlie responded. “I think Pokesmash is the best game ever.”

“Oh, okay. He’s not lame,” whispered Alex, to himself. “Pokesmash is the best game ever and no one can have any other opinion about it.”

Charlie threw his Pokeball, and out from it sprung a new Pokemon - not his Dragonmaster, but another, more noble Pokemon: it was Farfetch’d, the simplest, most excellent Pokemon in the whole world. Seeing it brought a tear to Ryan’s eye; he had never seen such a beautiful beast before. In its hand, it held a leek, and that got Rahul’s stomach a-rumbling. He clapped his hands furiously, and out from the bushes came two women running frantically. They each held a plate of crisp-tender roast duck with cherry-rosemary sauce. Rahul began to dig into the plates without even a plastic fork, so hungry was he. Cherry-rosemary sauce went flying in all directions, and Alex and Ryan had to run away from him to get out of the blast radius. Once they were clear, Ryan pulled out lil Dexy and pointed it at Charlie’s Pokemon.

“Farfetch’d, the Wild Duck Pokemon,” Ryan’s Pokedex stated. “Lives where reedy plants grow. They are rarely seen, so it's thought their numbers are decreasing. It is the Pokemon all gentlemen and scholars use in battle.” Ryan was in awe. He thought he was a gentleman (though he had no idea what a scholar was). He wanted such an amazing Pokemon for himself. Alas, that would mean going out into the tall grass to try to find one, and such a task seemed so tedious that Ryan nearly fell over right then and there.

“Bulk up, now!” roared Jesse, who was not listening. His hair waved about like it was seaweed in a hurricane.

Primeape obeyed and his began to bounce around like a popcorn kernel in the microwave. When he was done, Primeape stood a wee bit taller and a good deal thicker - his muscles were as thick as Rahul’s neck, almost. He looked like a fearsome beast. Ryan pointed his Pokedex at this Pokemon, and Dex droned: “Primape, the Pig Monkey Pokemon. It stops being angry only when nobody else is around. To view this moment is very difficult.”

Charlie smirked. “Swords dance, Annihilator!”

“Heh, well I’ll tell ya, it’s time for a Hyper Beam, eh?” Jesse thundered. His Primeape grunted and then shot its Hyper Beam at the Farfetch’d. Luckily for the readers, of whom the old Zerg is king, this attack missed.

“Alright man, whatever you want,” Charlie responded, a look of annoyance clear on his face. “But if you won’t respect the sanctity of a Farfetch’d Swords Dance setup…”

“Ha!” Jesse bellowed. “I know that’s just another HAARP conspiracy! They’re controlling the weather man. Mind control! Think again, ha!”

“Yeah, that sounds great,” Charlie said. “Jet fuel can’t melt steel beams. I learned that in my biological anthropology class.”

This declaration shocked Jesse to his core. He began to shake like a willow tree with Parkinson’s. Then, he began to grunt and howl like a feral Ponyta in heat. Primeape took this as his instruction to shoot another Hyper Beam. This time, the attack missed again and hit a nearby tree, causing it to burst into flames. Ryan, and Alex had to fling themselves out of the way, hailing curses and breadcrumbs at the Primeape who had as poor an aim as a stormtrooper in A New Hope. Rahul, meanwhile, did not move, for he was busy eating. No matter how loudly Alex and Ryan tried to yell at him, he did not look up. It appeared like he was ignoring them, but he was really probably just in a food frenzy. Ryan scowled and pulled out his Pokeball with Thurnax in it.

Throwing the ball, Ryan shouted, “Thurnax, use surf!”

Ryan’s Dragonair was a good, loyal Pokemon, and she rode that wave right into the forest, putting the fire right out.

Ryan and Alex ran over to Rahul. “Yo, Rahul, why didn’t you move? There was a fire!”

Rahul looked up, his face and wifebeater covered in dark sauce, his beady little eyes shining like black diamonds. “Oh, I didn’t hear you,” he said with a shrug, and then went back to eating.

Up ahead, the battle continued. “Swords Dance,” shouted Charlie, proudly.

He was not going to give into Jesse’s insanity. He was going to maintain his honor. Farfetch’d, being the noble, simple Pokemon it is, could break under such pressure. This Charlie knew, and this Alex, who was watching with the intensity of a dude who once locked himself out of his own dorm room, knew too.

“The government did 911,” Jesse said, trying to break Charlie’s will, but that just made the boy in the white t-shirt laugh and nod his head.

Professor Chris Mercer, who is my teacher and decided to spend half of our last class showing us a 911 conspiracy video for no other reason than to show that he’s clinically insane, suddenly burst out of the bushes and gave two thumbs up. This comforted Jesse “the body” Ventura, and he was able to regain his composure. “Do another Hyper Beam. And, heh, I’ll tell ya, if this one misses too, Lyndon Johnson definitely killed JFK.”

The Hyper Beam missed.

“I knew it,” Charlie declared. “The second shooter at the grassy knoll definitely wasn’t your Primeape, mayne.”

‘Why, I otta…” Jesse stammered. “Heh, alright. I was a fighter, a governor, a NAVY seal. Come on, Primeape, Hyper Beam this stupid bird back to the Bilderberg secret underground headquarters!”

“Swords Dance,” Charlie responded, calmly.

The Hyper Beam missed again. It was so shocking that Rahul squealed like a stuck pig.

“Okay, Annihilator, it’s time for a Fly attack,” Charlie shouted.

“Wait, I gotta get another Hyper Beam in here,” Jesse protested. But it was too late. The next Hyper Beam missed, and the Farfetch’d took to the air, cawing and screaming and flying so very high.

“Man, that’s a brave bird,” Ryan said to himself. “I bet he’s as high as a kite by now.”

Rahul wiped his fingers on his wifebeater and raised his Sonic Screwdriver to the sky. “This is almost as epic as Doctor Who Season 7 Episode 14!”

“Gruhh, do one last Hyper Beam, I’ll tell ya!” Jesse hollered in desperation.

Then, Farfetch’d came flying down again. And before Jesse could so much as yell “the government!”, Farfetch’d crashed into Primeape, knocking it unconscious in one fell swoop. The furry Pokemon fell to the ground, dazed, causing Jesse to recall it. “Dang government trying control our minds,” Jesse protested. “Heh, alright, let’s see how you deal with this. This guy’s a fighter just like me!” Jesse “the body” Ventura spat proudly. He flung another Pokeball, and out from it came a Sandslash.

Charlie was unimpressed. “Fly!” he shouted.

Farfetch’d, thus undamaged, and nobler for his beautiful setup, began to soar into the sky. This time, he flew so close to Jesse as he went that the former governor got spooked and ran off into the forest.

“I’m off the grid!” Jesse screamed. “No internet out here, no way man. The government can’t track me now! I live in the Baja! Ah, the Baja! Get your drones away from me! I’m not ready to die! I ain’t got time to bleed!”

Annihilator kept on his path towards the Sandslash, who began to tremble as it saw the opponent approach. Jesse saw this and wet himself. Streams of water flowed down his dark jeans and into the soil below, watering the parched ground of the Viridian Forest with the official release of a former governor, fighter, and NAVY seal. Jesse grunted and slapped his stomach. “I went off the grid so that the drones wouldn’t watch me! They can’t catch me! Not if they can’t see me, ha!”

And with that, Jesse Ventura, the puissant man who once pretended he was a NAVY seal, disappeared into Viridian Forest, never to be seen again. His poor Sandslash was left to stand there, without anyone having told him what move to do. So he did nothing.

Annihilator crashed into the Sandslash, knocking it over and dazing both of them. With no longer a master to guide him, the Sandslash ran over to the nearest tree and began to cower behind it.

“Hey!” Ryan said, running up to the Pokemon. “You can’t just leave your Pokemon here!” he shouted into the forest. There was no response. The drone, better known as the noble and honorable Annihilator, seemed to have scared off Jesse. Alas, his Sandslash had been left behind. When it saw Ryan, it recoiled, expecting another blow to come down upon it.

Rahul and Alex came running over too. “Hey, did that guy seriously leave his Pokemon behind?” Rahul asked.

“That Farfetch’d must’ve really frightened him,” Alex answered.

“Yeah…” said Ryan, looking down at the injured Sandslash. “What kind of guy just leaves his Pokemon behind? That should never happen. Your Pokemon should be your buddies! You gotta take care of them, no matter what!”

“I think he was on some mind control,” Charlie pointed out, walking over to them. He stopped, glancing up at Alex, first. “Sup whiny face.”

“Oh, okay,” Alex said, flustered. He almost busted out the yo-yos he was so confused.

Charlie continued walking until he came across Rahul. “Oh hey, mayne,” he said to the big man. “Nice goatee.”

“Never cruel nor cowardly. Never give up. Never give in!” Rahul said, almost in reflex.

“Haha, yeah, Doctor Who, I get it,” Charlie said. “Great show.”

And then he came upon Ryan, who stood over the injured Sandslash that had once belonged to Jesse Ventura. “I know you,” Ryan said, as Charlie came up to him. “You’re on those wanted posters. You defeated all those bug catchers, and you’re on the run! There’s a big reward for whoever catches you! Why don’t you just give yourself up?”

“Haha, good one!” Charlie smiled sarcastically and pointed at Ryan as if to acknowledge the latter’s keen awareness. “I’m sure you’re a great trainer. Catch me if you can.”

“Is that all you have to say?” asked Ryan. He was a bit flustered himself, but at the same time, he took a Pokeball out of his pocket. Abra, who was perched on his shoulder, jeered at Charlie rambunctiously. Thurnax, who was still out of her Pokeball, eyed the white-shirted trainer with suspicion and growled. “I’ll defeat you myself if I have to! You aren’t getting away again!”

“I’m sure you’re really good, but I’ve got a debate to get to. Bob Odenkirk is the judge, so I can’t miss this. He’s no David Cross, but he’s aight.” With that, Charlie jumped on Dragonmaster, his patient Porygon, who had been at his side the entire time. Within a heartbeat, the white-and-pink blur that was the two of them disappeared off into the forest, in the opposite direction that Jesse Ventura had gone.

“Curses,” Ryan shouted, raising his fist to the sky. “Debating nuclear proliferation doesn’t matter!”

“Alright,” said Alex. “Brb shower.” And thus, Alex too disappeared into the forest, though Ryan knew he would come back soon.

“So what should we do with this Sandslash?” Ryan asked Rahul.

Rahul shrugged. He wiped his hand on his sauce-crusted wifebeater. “We’re nearly to Pewter City, right? Let’s take him to the PokeCenter and leave him there.”

Ryan scowled. “You’re just saying that because you want to see another Nurse Joy.”

Rahul’s face lit up like Snoop Dogg on Christmas Eve. “A-are… you serious?!” there was annoyance in his voice, and a grin upon his face. “Come on Ryan, don’t mess with my game. Seriously.”

“Alright Rahul, whatever you say,” Ryan conceded. He looked at Rahul’s goatee and noticed it was in fine form, and that was enough to make him acquiesce.

“Well, go on, catch it,” Rahul told him.

“No you.”

“Are you serious?!” Rahul said in that booming, droll voice of his. He thrust his hands into the air and shook his head violently.

“Fine.”

Ryan jumped back, took one of his father’s Ultra Balls out of his bag, ran his fingers through his hair, did a little spin move, and then threw the ball at Sandslash. “Gotta catch ‘em all! I wanna be the very best there ever was!”

That made Rahul start humming tunelessly to himself.

The Pokeball went flying through the air like a Pokeball in flight. It hit the Sandslash dead on the nose, causing it to fly back and scream in confusion. At once, a red light enveloped the creature and it was sucked into the ball. At that very moment, Rahul sprung forward, with a deliberate look on his face. He ran over to the Pokeball and covered it in a clear liquid with a little tube he was holding in his hand. When he was done, Rahul stepped back grinning.

“Crazy glue,” he declared. “There’s no way that Sandslash is getting out.”

“But, uh, Rahul, how am I supposed to get it out when I want to?”

Rahul’s grin turned upside down and he began to mutter to himself. Though they had captured a Sandslash, formerly the leal servant of one Jesse Ventura, it appeared the Pokemon was well and truly trapped inside its Pokeball. But that would be a problem for another episode, Ryan knew.

“I guess we should get going to Pewter City, right, buddy?” Ryan asked Abra, who was snoozing on his shoulder. The words brought Abra to conscious, and he seemed completely displeased with being thrust back into the real world.

“Abra, brah, brah!” Abra whined. “Abra!”

“Neeieieieie!” Thurnax squealed from Ryan’s side enthusiastically.

“Yeah!” Ryan said happily. “We’re off to Pewter City for my fourth badge!”

It had been a long time since Ryan had gotten his last badge - dare I say seven chapters, which in a story that is only 16 chapters long is quite the long time - but alas, it appeared like he was on a collision course with Pewter City, and nothing could stop that. Barring some miraculous turn of events, it appeared Ryan would indeed be getting his fourth Gym Badge quite soon. Rahul, who was a great trainer and an even greater guy, who only sometimes answered when you Facebook message him because I’m sure he’s very busy with many important things, had not a Pewter City badge either. So it was good fortune that the two were traveling together. It was their destiny, surely, to get this next badge before this chapter ends.

It was night when they reached the stony enclave known as Pewter City. The streets were abandoned, and a cool breeze was blowing through the town. Ryan, Alex, and Rahul strode in together, and looked around. Off into the distance, they could see the lights of the Pewter City Gym. Closer by was the PokeCenter, which was also adorned in what appeared to be old Christmas lights. It was cold, and they all began to shiver. Clumps of snow lay around the buildings and on their roofs, and judging by the dark sky, it looked like it might snow again.

“We should find a place to sleep,” Alex said.

“Isn’t the gym still open?” Ryan asked.

Rahul frowned. “Let’s go see. Come on Alex, I don’t want to stay here. Look at this place - it’s all rocky and cold and miserable. Let’s get out of here as soon as we can.”

“Alright, whatever,” said Alex.

And so they went off, but as they passed by the PokeCenter, Ryan told them he needed to tend to Jesse’s Sandslash.

“If the gym’s open, you go first, alright Rahul?” he said.

“Yeah, fine, fine,” Rahul replied, and off he went with Alex into the night.

Inside, Ryan was greeted by a Chansey who whisked him over to a Nurse Joy standing at the counter. The pink-haired woman looked a lot like a nurse Ryan had seen in another PokeCenter. It was almost like they were sisters, the resemblance was so uncanny.

“May I help you?” she asked in a sweet voice.

“Yeah,” replied Ryan, fumbling for Sandslash’s Pokeball in his bag. Nurse Joy continued to stare and smile at him, and that made Ryan’s ears go red. He thought she looked mighty pretty in that nurse outfit of hers… “Uh, yeah, here it is!” he said, a little too loudly.

Nurse Joy took the Pokeball and tilted her head, a look of puzzlement clear upon her face. “Um, what is this stuff all over the ball?”

“Oh yeah, that’s crazy glue… my friend put it on. I-I was wondering if you could get it off for me.”

Nurse Joy giggled. “Of course, I’ll get one of our Chanseys on it at once!” She stood up straight and laughed, throwing the ball behind here, where a Chansey was waiting to catch it. “And is this your Pokemon, mister?”

“Nope,” said Ryan. “There was the old bald guy who it belonged to, but after he lost the battle he ran off without taking his Pokemon with him.”

“Oh no, that’s terrible! What kind of trainer would do that to his Pokemon?”

“I know… he doesn’t know it’s here, either, so I’m not sure what to do with it.”

“Well,” Nurse Joy began, “we’ll keep the Pokemon overnight, and if its owner shows up, we’ll give it back to them.”

“But what if he never comes?”

“Well… in that case, we’ll keep his Pokemon here until he does!”

Ryan looked down and thought of Thurnax, the Dragonair he had found abandoned. He wondered if her owner was out there looking for her even now. Probably not, he thought. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have abandoned Thurnax in the first place…

And yet, there was also Abra, Ryan’s first and favorite Pokemon. That had been his father’s Pokemon, one he had never asked his father if he could take. I wonder if dad’s mad about that. He didn’t know. ''I should call home and see what’s up… maybe after I get my next badge. Maybe if Dad hears I've gotten four badges, he'll be proud of me.''

Ryan looked up at Nurse Joy and nodded goodbye, before walking out into the brisk night air. He knew Jesse would never come back for that Sandslash, and it would be forced to stay in that cramped little Pokeball for years, at least. That was no way to live. On the one hand, he knew it wasn’t his Pokemon to take, but on the other…

“Huh, what was that?!” Ryan shouted, his voice echoing down the empty streets. His breath frosted the air. Above him, there was a pink light hovering distantly in the sky. It was so dark that not even the moon was out. A few lights in the town made things a little lighter, but still, it was nigh black as pitch. It made that floating pink light all the more apparent.

Ryan pointed his Pokedex at the light, thinking wildly that he might be seeing a Pokemon, though there was no Pokemon he knew of that could float and generate pink light. “There is no data,” the Pokedex replied. “No Pokemon is in range.”

“Huh? Then what is that thing?” Ryan watched the pink dot for a few more seconds. As he walked down the road to the Pewter City Gym, his eyes on the sky, Ryan saw the pink light suddenly fade away into nothing. Just like that it was gone. “Weird,” he said to himself. “I must be seeing things.”

Ryan passed by a building that a sign told him was called the “Pewter City Museum”. He found it somewhat odd that though the building had a “CLOSED” sign on its front door, there were still a few lights on in the second story. Even so, such a sight did not concern the trainer, and he continued on his walk.

As the teal-haired boy approached the Pewter City Gym, Ryan noticed an old man sitting on a nicely-polished slab of rock to his left. He had a long, spiky brown beard and wore a red beanie pulled so far down his face that the boy could not even see the man’s eyes. He sat in what appeared to be a meditation pose, and Ryan would have mistaken him for a statue had the man not spoken just then.

“"Pewter City is grey... the color of stone. This town has always been famous for stone.”

“Huh?!” Ryan jumped back in shock. “What are you talking about, old man?”

“The name's Flint. And I’m not that old.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“You goin’ in the gym?” Ryan nodded. “Don't tell me you plan on challenging Forrest, the Pewter City gym leader.”

"Of course I do!" Ryan's voice rang with confidence.

Flint began to laugh a flinty laugh. "Hahaha... you'll beat him? Hahaha… that’s a good one.”

Ryan’s face went red. “What’s the big deal? He’s just another gym leader. I’ve already beaten three of them!” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the little booklet he was keeping his Gym Badges in. “See?”

“Hahaha…” Flint continued to laugh quietly to himself. “You’re confident now, but just wait until Forrest beats your Pikachu. Then you’ll come crawling back to me and beg me to help you.”

“What are you talking about? I don’t have a Pikachu.”

At that Flint stood up straight and grimaced. “O-oh… in that case, well you can go on in.” He then reached for something and produced a small rock with a pricetag on it. “By the way, do you want to buy any of my merchandise?”

“You sell rocks?” Ryan’s eyes narrowed in disbelief.

“They’re Pewter City souvenirs. Wanna buy some?”

“Uh, no thanks, man!” Ryan said, before running off into the Pewter City Gym. “Man that guy was weird!” he whispered to himself as he ran. “This whole place is creepy. Rahul was right. We should get out of here as soon as we can!”

And with that, Ryan went sprinting to the Pewter City Gym, where Rahul was surely battling Forrest for a Boulder Badge. And soon, Ryan knew, so would he.

Episode 17: Now She's In Me
The big man’s Lapras stood on the rocky floor of the Pewter City Gym, cool and confident. It was a dim place, the air dusty and brown-tinted; rocks were strewn across the ground in a sort of obstacle maze that Ryan found himself forced to navigate. Still, it was not a hard puzzle, and he realized that simply following the path through the rocks on either side was enough to bring him to his destination.

Ryan could barely make out the visage of the Gym Leader from this far away - all he could see was a brown, spiky-haired man with a green striped shirt and blue jeans. They were already at battle - Lapras was facing off against an Onix. Just when Ryan came into the warm, low-lit building, he heard Rahul shout, “Surf!”, and Lapras exploded onto a wave of water, shooting itself at the Onix. The Gym Leader’s Onix was hit fully by the attack and fell backwards, unconscious. Then, the Gym Leader returned his Pokemon, and yelled.

“Well done. You have defeated me. I guess that means you deserve a Boulder Badge.”

Rahul whooped and danced around like Stephen Hawking at a disco party. Ryan clenched his fists. ''If he can get one of those badges so easily, I should be able to too! He used a water Pokemon, and a water move…'' The boy glanced down at his bag, looking at the six Pokeballs within. Now, who do I use, he thought. ''I know! Cloyster!'' Ryan grabbed the ball holding his Cloyster and brought it out. In the other hand, he produced his Pokedex and pointed it at the ball.

“Alright Dex, tell me what moves Myrrah knows.”

“Myrrah the Cloyster knows the following moves: Withdraw, Supersonic, Clamp, Aurora Beam.”

“Are any of those water type moves?” the teal-haired boy asked.

“Clamp is a water move.”

“Perfect.”

Ryan stepped forward, ready to challenge the Pewter City Gym Leader, when suddenly from behind a boulder, a little kid lunged out. He threw his Pokeball at his feet and then screamed:

“I’m a Jr. Trainer, let’s fight!”

Ryan was unimpressed. “I’m here for the Gym Badge. I don’t want to fight you.”

“Too bad, I already saw you! That’s all it takes!”

The boy sighed and fingered his Pokeball containing Myrrah. Noticing that the Jr. Trainer had let out a Diglett, he wasn’t all that worried. “Fine. But this is an entirely pointless battle.”

“No way, I’m a Jr. Trainer! I’m in the gym! I’m important!”

Myrrah took out the Diglett with a single Clamp, causing Ryan’s opponent to cry out in anguish, as if he had just been hit by a bus. He threw a second Pokeball, but Ryan left his Cloyster out. “It’s going to be another ground Pokemon,” he told Myrrah. “It’s definitely a theme. Clamp the heck out of whatever it is!”

And so she did. The poor Sandshrew the Jr. Trainer let out was immediately tackled by Myrrah, wrapped up in her shell, and clamped pretty hard. The whole battle lasted about ten seconds. Once it was over, the Jr. Trainer fell over and started crying. “But I’m supposed to be the best! I’m in the Gym! I’m Forrest’s second-hand man!”

“What’s your name, kid?” Ryan asked him, returning Myrrah to her Pokeball.

“I’m Jr. Trainer!” the other responded, his face red with sorrow and humiliation.

“See, that’s your problem,” the boy observed. “I don’t know why your mother named you that, but it was a pretty accurate name.”

Leaving the crying Jr. Trainer behind, Ryan moved forward to the gym fighting platform, where Rahul and Alex stood, the former being congratulated by a man with closed eyes, whom Ryan knew to be the Gym Leader.

“Nice work, buddy!” Ryan said, enthusiastically. He came over and patted Rahul on the shoulder, causing the larger boy to grunt in pleasure. “Only four more to go!”

“Yeah,” Rahul stroked his goatee. “Let’s get out of here.”

“Wait, I’ve still gotta get my badge!”

“Oh, right.”

“Stand back and watch the magic,” Ryan said, cocksure as a midget on the yellow brick road. “This won’t take long.”

“Hello,” said the man standing across from the group. “I'm Forrest.”

“Nice to meet you,” Ryan replied with a little bow. “I’m Ryan. I’m here to beat you!”

Forrest nodded curtly. “I'm Pewter's Gym Leader! I believe in rock hard defense and determination! That's why my Pokémon are all the Rock-type! Do you still want to challenge me?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Fine then! Show me your best!”

Forrest threw a Pokeball, and out from it popped a measly Geodude. Ryan almost laughed as he threw Myrrah’s Pokeball. It doesn’t seem fair, he thought. But I guess that’s what I get for challenging some of the harder gyms first.

“Geodude, Tackle attack!”

Ryan stepped back and smiled. “Clamp it up, y’all!.”

His Cloyster nodded in obedience and then thrust itself forward, using its superior speed to catch the Geodude in midair. Before Forrest’s Pokemon could use its attack, Myrrah clamped down on it and knocked it unconscious.

“Impressive,” Forrest said. “Return, Geodude. Go, Onix!”

“Use an Aurora Beam this time,” Ryan commanded his Cloyster.

She did so without pause; in a brilliant flash of light, Myrrah’s beam hit Forrest’s Onix, sending it flying back into a nearby collection of rocks, strewn on the edge of the fighting pad. Seeing this, Forrest sighed, and then spoke:

“Return, Onix.”

“Return, Myrrah.”

Forrest smiled and stepped forward, reaching for something in his pocket. “I took you for granted. As proof of your victory, here's the Boulder Badge!”

Ryan beamed, did a little jump, and punched the sky. “Yeah man, I’m invincible!”

“I’m guessing this isn’t your first badge,” Forrest said. “Usually, trainers who come to face me have just begun their journeys.”

Ryan went a little red. “Y-yeah… well, I live on the other side of Kanto, so I may have already tried out a few other gyms!”

Forrest nodded. “You’re not a bad trainer, Ryan. Just make sure that you don’t get overconfident, so you don’t let yourself get outsmarted on the battlefield. Always remember that your opponents can defeat you; this will be more apparent once you fight against trainers who have similarly-leveled Pokemon. But good match nonetheless.”

“Alright,” the boy said, putting his new shiny Boulder Badge in the little booklet with his Volcano Badge, Soul Badge, and Thunder Badge. “Whatever you say! I’m the winner! I’m the winner! Whoo!!”

Forrest laughed, in spite of himself, but he never opened his eyes. Ryan had no idea why that was. Regardless, now that the Gym battles were over, Ryan and the others decided to run out of the rocky, poorly-lit place, their hearts light and their minds full of thoughts about how great they were.

Outside, they were met with a cold blast of reality; it was snowing, and snowing hard.

“Man, we’ll never be able to travel in this!” Ryan complained.

“Alright, let’s find a place to spend the night. You guys received some money for beating Forrest, so that shouldn’t be a problem.” Ryan and Rahul nodded. “And it’s getting late. Those dishes won’t wash themselves,” he said, more to himself than to the others.

So off the three went, into the blizzard, to find a nice, and hopefully cheap, place to spend the night.

The wind was rising. Ryan could hear it beating against the room of their motel. It was a shabby, dirty place they were staying in. In this bleak town, Ryan guessed there were few travelers who stayed more than a day, so these old rooms had probably not been cleaned in a long time. He noticed a layer of dust, nearly half an inch thick, coating the nearby dresser. He glanced over at the telephone, hanging on the nearby wall (which was a thin layer of pink-and-white patterned paper that was beginning to peel off and yellow) and bit his lip, remembering the message he had left for his parents. ''Hi mom, it’s me, Ryan. Just wanted to let you know that I won my fourth badge today. I’m making great progress! Hopefully I’ll be able to take part in the Indigo League Tournament this year. I hope you and dad are doing good and can come see me fight. That would be awesome. Anyways, I’m off to Cerulean City. I’ll call again after I get my next badge.'' There had been no answer. It was late, but not that late - only 8:30 pm. He would expect them to still be up at that time. ''Maybe they went to sleep early. That’s why there was no answer.''

Rahul was lying back in bed, engorging himself on a cheese pizza he had ordered from room service and watching the television. On it, two Pokemon trainers were battling - one had a Rhydon, and the other a Nidoking. Ryan became enthralled with the battle too, and soon, the two trainers were shouting just as loudly as the crowd surrounding the two Pokemon and their owners (Ryan rooted for Nidoking, while Rahul of course rooted for Rhydon). I want to be like that one day, Ryan thought. I want the whole world to cheer me on. Right now, he would settle for his parents showing up to his first battle in the Indigo League.

Alex suddenly appeared, wearing a white apron and yellow rubber gloves, and sat down on the edge of the bed. After a few seconds of watching the battle, he stood up and walked away in annoyance. “There is literally no reason for Nidoking to use Poison Sting,” he said. “These two don’t know what they’re doing. And the crowd is just as ignorant.”

“What moveset would you give Nidoking?” Ryan asked him.

“Earthquake, Blizzard, Thunder, Body Slam,” the dishwasher replied instantly.

Rahul rolled his head around, grinning in disbelief. “Come on, Alex! Those are all TMs.”

“Yeah, well that’s the optimal moveset for Nidoking.”

“I know, but still…” Rahul laughed, shaking his head. “Can’t we just enjoy this? All I want to see is a bunch of mindless fights, and it doesn’t matter if it makes sense! I just want to be entertained.”

“Do you know the best moves for all Pokemon?” Ryan asked Alex.

Alex shrugged. “I’ve got a book I’m working on,” he said, pointing to his backpack, which was slung around a nearby chair. “I’ve been theorizing about the best movesets for all Pokemon, as well as which Pokemon are the best for competitive battling. But it’s not complete. Not yet. I still have a lot more traveling to do, and a lot more Pokemon to study.”

“Aw, can you tell me which moves I should give my Pokemon?”

Alex took off his rubber gloves and sat down in a chair to eat a cookie he had found on a plate. “In the morning, maybe. First you have to come up with your six-Pokemon team. No use coming up for moves for Pokemon that won’t get you anywhere in the Indigo League.”

“Quiet!” Rahul roared, as the Rhydon and Nidoking continued to battle it out on TV. “I want to see who wins.”

Alex shrugged, and Ryan got up, slinking over to the table where Alex sat. “What should my team be?”

“There’s no perfect team,” Alex replied nonchalantly, nibbling on his cookie. Ryan noticed it was a raisin cookie and nearly vomited. “Why don’t you tell me what you have right now.”

“Uh… well, I’ve got a Charmeleon, a Dragonair, a Cloyster… a Tauros that some guy gave me, a Golduck, oh and my Abra! And I have a Beedrill and either a Nidorino or a Nidorina in storage.”

“Those last two are useless,” Alex said unmercifully. “Cloyster, Tauros, and Abra are all good. Of course you still need to level them up some more, especially Abra. He needs to have evolved into an Alakazam by the time you get to the Indigo League if you want to use him there. Charmeleon and Dragonair might be usable if you level them up, too.”

“What other Pokemon should I catch?” Ryan’s voice was filled with awe. He had never thought about his final team for the Indigo League, but now he was getting excited. Especially if he had someone as smart as Alex helping him, he knew he might be able to get pretty far in the tournament.

Alex reached into his backpack and took out his book. Thumbing through it, he stopped on a page and pointed to a list of Pokemon. “Exeggutor, Gengar, Rhydon or Golem, Starmie, Chansey, and Snorlax are all good choices. If you don’t plan on using your Charizard and Dragonite, once they evolve, you should use three Pokemon from that list.”

“Well, I do like Aegon and Thurnax,” Ryan said. “But I would like a Gengar. I always thought that was one of the coolest Pokemon since I was a kid!”

“Alright,” Alex said. “If you can find a Haunter, definitely catch it. You may want to consider another Pokemon from my list, though. Charizard won’t be that great against trainers who have a good team.”

“And how many of my opponents in the Indigo League will know about the best Pokemon to have?”

Alex shrugged. “Probably not many. But it never hurts to have a good team anyways.”

“Yeah, I’ve always wanted to be the best!”

Alex didn’t laugh, as often happened when Ryan made a joke around him. And while that made Ryan sad, the boy could not dwell on such emotions, for he knew that he needed to get some sleep. Soon, the three would rise and set off for Cerulean City, and soon Ryan would need to find and catch a Haunter. He got up, thanked Alex for his wise counsel, and made his way to bed. Soon, Alex did the same. Rahul, however, stayed up quite a while longer, watching the great Pokebattles on screen and sucking on the hot green pepper that had come with his now-fully-consumed pizza, no doubt oblivious to the fact that such battles were, invariably, only a taste of what could actually be realized by the most skilled and intelligent trainers.

The blizzard had stopped by morning, and Ryan, Rahul, and Alex were greeted to the sight of snow slowly melting off Pewter City’s world famous rocks when they stepped outside. The three bundled up in their heaviest, warmest clothes, and then set out into the cold of day. It was a grim prospect, for Ryan hated the cold almost as much as he hated school, but he knew they could not afford to waste any more time. The tournament was coming up soon, and Kelly would be waiting for him there. He would not let himself miss that.

“We better get to Cerulean City fast,” Alex warned. “There may be another storm coming.”

“Yeah let’s go! Fifth badge, here we come!” Ryan said cheerfully.

Rahul looked rather tired and merely grumbled some quiet acknowledgement.

As the three adventurers gathered their bags and set out, Rahul’s Charizard, and Ryan’s and Alex’s Charmeleons blasted the snow from their path. They tread through the sodden, muddy path until they came to a spectacle just outside the Pewter City Museum. Dozens of people stood standing around, some even with their Pokemon. No less than four Officer Jennys could Ryan see. At once, Rahul went running up to one, whom he showed his sonic screwdriver to (Ryan knew Rahul was trying to get the pretty bluish-haired policewoman to show him her guns in return). Ryan and Alex walked up to the entrance of the museum, where a frazzled-looking man with long black hair and a fine suit and bowtie was standing.

“What’s going on?” asked Alex.

“Oh, it’s terrible. Dreadful! Horrific! Just the worst!” the man languished. “Someone stole all of our fossil specimens! Priceless artifacts! They belonged in a museum… our museum! And now they’re gone! It’s just dreadful! Horrific! A nightmare!” The man appeared to be crying.

Ryan tilted his head in confusion. “Why would anyone do that?”

“Oh, these fossils are worth a fortune! And if one has the proper technology, I’m sure you could reanimate a few of the ancient Pokemon found inside those fossils.”

“That sounds ridiculous,” Ryan noted.

“It’s always been like that. Don’t question the science of the Pokeworld,” the man wailed.

“Okay man, chill.”

Ryan and Alex were just about to leave, when the teal-haired boy spotted a familiar man standing just inside the museum.

“Dr. Kaku!”

“Who, wha… don’t assault me!” Michio Kaku screamed suddenly, turning and cowering.

“Uh, it’s just me, Ryan. Remember? You led me and my group through Viridian Forest not too long ago.”

“Ah yes, of course,” chuckled Michio, though in his eyes was a certain wild bewilderment that Ryan knew meant the man had no clue who he was.

“We were just going over what happened to the museum,” Mr. Kaku explained. “Some hooligans, most likely. That’s what the physics imply. They came in here,” Michio said with a little laugh, “and stole all of the fossils last night. All of them, every one! They sure were thorough.”

Ryan thought back to the light he had seen on in the second story of the museum the night before, and how weird he had found it at the time. I could have stopped this if I had realized what was going on. “Yeah, that sucks,” he said.

“We have teams out looking for whoever did this. Would you be so kind as to keep an eye out, too?” Dr. Kaku asked politely. “We really would like to get the fossils back. They are an important part of the history of this town… and of Kanto as a whole!”

“Don’t worry, we will,” said Alex quietly.

“Hey, who’s that?” asked Ryan, pointing to a hanging wall scroll just to the left of Michio Kaku and the destroyed museum cases that once housed all of the building’s fossils. On it was the visage of a woman with silver hair and bright purple eyes. She was riding on a Charizard who was shooting fire out of its mouth at another flying Pokemon with purple skin and a dinosaur-like face that Ryan did not know. She was the most beautiful woman Ryan had ever seen. It took his breath away just looking at her.

“Oh that?” Michio Kaku seemed surprised. “That is a painting done of the reclusive Dragon-type caretaker of Kanto, Derceyes. She owns the largest collection of Dragon and Dragon-like Pokemon in the region - if not the world, in my estimation.”

“She’s still alive?”

“Oh yes, she lives just north of Cerulean City to this day.”

“Why is there a painting of her in the museum, though?”

“Well, as you can see, she is a bit of a prodigy as it relates to Dragon Pokemon. It is her research that taught us much of what we know about these kinds of Pokemon. She has given us much of her research and even donated the eggs of her Pokemon to allow us to study these species more closely. And, look,” Michio said, pointing to a clear glass case just below the picture. “These mega stones were given to us by Derceyes to study.”

“What’s a mega stone?”

“Heheh, well, don’t worry about that,” Michio Kaku said. “That is something for us physicists at Smogon University to study. If we ever figure out what they’re for, we’ll let you know.”

“Dean has a mega stone for Magikarp,” Alex observed. “It’s on his mega ring. I think we already know what mega stones do.”

“No, no, no, no one knows. Not yet,” Michio Kaku stated. “We must study these mysterious devices more closely if we are to transition into the future of tomorrow. You see, Tomorrowland is a land of extraordinary promise and superhighways. In the future, no one will leave their houses - it will be a world of three-dimensional imagination full of cybernetic…”

Ryan and Alex got the heck out of there as soon as Dr. Kaku started to ramble. When they returned to Rahul, who was sitting on nearby bench, enjoying a bowl of hot and sour soup, they found the boy to be in high spirits. “Look what I got,” he boasted to the other two, holding up a little strip of paper. “Officer Jenny’s number.”

Alex snatched up the piece of paper and read it. “This is just the number for the police… 911.”

“It’s Officer Jenny’s number,” Rahul said, unperturbed. “Once I get all of the badges, I’m going to give her a call. She’s a fan of Doctor Who. I showed her my Facebook, and she loves how I share all this useless crap about things I like all day every day. 24/7, Alex.”

“Alright,” said Alex, ignoring his good friend. “Let’s go.”

So off they went, their fire Pokemon melting a path in the road for them. The road to Route 3 was as rocky as it was cold, as crater-filled as it was desolate. Ryan saw not a single strip of tall grass to train his Pokemon in. Instead, they trudged on in silence, occasionally stopping to eat, but never stopping for long. Abra rode in Ryan’s hoodie, sometimes muttering in his sleep, sometimes teetering on the edge of falling out (though he never quite did). The fire Pokemon continued their work in earnest, never seeming to tire of spitting out their lifeflames. But aside from the whooshing of their fires, or the hissing of the snow melting, there was almost no sound. Route 3 had an eeriness to it with how quiet it had become, Ryan came to learn. He guessed that was probably because of the blizzard sending all of the wild Pokemon and travelers into hiding, but it was unnerving nonetheless.

So it should come as no surprise that when the three boys heard voices carrying over the snow and rocky cliffs of Route 3, they all paused and looked at one another to make sure they were not hearing things. Curiously, Ryan leading them, the group made their way off the path, into the snow, and to the voices. When they rounded a large chunk of rock stuck in the ground, they found two people standing in a clearing, next to a few pine trees.

One, Ryan immediately noticed. He was Gillford, the pathetic little recruit of Team Rocket. He was wearing a dark suit with the Team Rocket logo emblazoned upon his chest in a red “R”. Standing next to him was a purple-haired girl with light green eyes. She too was wearing a dark Team Rocket suit. Upon seeing Ryan and the others, the two looked up and cursed. They jumped back, revealing a clearing in the snow, where they had laid out their plunder.

“The fossils,” Alex whispered to the others, pointing at the bag that lay on the ground. A few old rocks were spilling out of it, and the little yellow bag was probably filled to the brim with expensive artifacts.

“So these are the ones who stole from the museum?” Rahul stepped and scratched his goatee. “But why did you guys do that?”

“Shut up,” the girl replied. “Turn around and walk away. What we’re doing doesn’t concern you.”

“No way,” said Ryan. “We know what you did! We’re going to return those fossils to the Pewter City Museum.”

“Not a chance,” said the girl, smiling slightly.

She snapped her fingers, and then from the nearby bushes, a Pokemon came shooting out.

It was one Ryan knew, one that made his heart start to beat faster, one that made him as anxious and hopeful as it did scared. He brought out his Pokedex anyways and pointed it at the hovering, purple monster.

“Haunter, the Gas Pokemon. By licking, it saps the victim's life. It causes shaking that won't stop until the victim's demise,” the Pokedex droned.

“Haunter, use Hypnosis on these fools.”

“No wait!” Rahul said, reaching for a Pokeball. Alex did likewise, but it was too late; the Haunter unleashed its attack on the two, instantly causing them to fall over into the snow, asleep.

Ryan, however, was saved. He too had screamed and put his hands over his face, anticipating the worst. Yet, his Abra had woken up at that moment, and just before the two could be hypnotized to sleep, Abra had teleported them safely away. Now Ryan stood alone to face the two members of Team Rocket.

Gillford grumbled, reached for a Pokeball, and then threw it. Out came a Poliwrath to join Haunter.

“Oh come on, two-on-one isn’t fair!” Ryan complained.

“Life’s not fair,” the girl noted. She had a cute, pirate smile on her face now. “This ends now.”

Ryan scrunched up his face and then pointed to the snow. “Alright, fine. Go Abra! Let’s take these guys out!”

There stood Ryan’s most noble Pokemon. Haunter and Poliwrath loomed over Abra like two predators about to pounce on their next meal. Ryan knew this was going to be over soon. He reached into his pocket to grab a second Pokeball. I can’t let Abra get hung out to dry.

Before he could throw the Pokeball (the Pokemon inside being a mystery that will surely never be solved in this story), there came a shout from behind Ryan. He turned and saw a man in a thick Gore-Tex jacket slogging through the snow. His brown hair, dark skin, and closed eyes were unmistakable.

“Forrest?!”

“Go Golem!” the Gym Leader shouted. Out from the Pokeball came a large rock Pokemon, the final evolution of Geodude. I knew that guy had stronger Pokemon than the ones he used against me! “Help that Abra take these Team Rocket lackeys out!”

Now Abra and Golem stood against Poliwrath and Haunter. We have a chance now, Ryan knew. It’s time to remind Gillford how bad of a trainer he is. And that girl, though she was pretty with her dyed purple hair and shiny earrings, would have to pay too. There was something attractive and cold about her, something that made Ryan both want to beat her in battle and take her out to see a movie. But he had priorities. ''They stole from the museum. We have to get the fossils back.''

“I’m no lackey,” replied the girl. “I’m the second-in-command of Team Rocket! I’ll make you pay for underestimating me!”

“And I can levitate!” Gillford added. “I’m a Tier 1 warrior who exists beyond the planes of reality! My Pokemon are demi-gods! You cannot hope to defeat me!”

Ryan and Forrest looked at one another and nodded. “Don’t hold back,” Forrest told him. “We’re going to show Team Rocket that they can’t get away with stealing from anyone.”

Ryan clenched his fists and looked back at the four Pokemon ahead of him. “Alright Abra. Let’s do this! Use Thunder Wave on that Haunter!”

And thus, Ryan’s first double battle (which had had the most peculiar lead up to a battle ever), was about to begin. Like every other battle that had already occurred in this story, this one was going to decide the fate of the universe or something. Don’t miss the stunning conclusion to this legendary clash of titans in the next episode of A Just Edge!

Episode 18: Trading Snakeoil for Wolftickets
The four Pokemon trainers stood opposing one another: Ryan and Forrest on one side, and Gillford and the mysterious girl who called herself the second-in-command of Team Rocket on the other. The wind was blowing, and everyone was quiet; everything was peaceful. And then, all at once, the four broke out into commands for their Pokemon, thus beginning the inevitable cacophony of battle.

“Hypnosis that Golem,” the Team Rocket girl ordered her ghost Pokemon. The attack was as quick as it was devastating. Ryan and Abra looked away just in time, but the Golem was not so fortunate. It fell to sleep at once, robbing Forrest of coming up with an attack for his Pokemon to use.

Ryan already knew what he was going to do. “Alright Abra. Let’s do this! Use Thunder Wave on that Haunter!”

Ryan’s Abra jumped forward in an elegant (but unnecessary) front flip. A second later, a charge of electricity left his fist and shot towards the Team Rocket girl’s Haunter. The attack hit, covering the poor Haunter in a field of electricity. But alas, Paralysis only works 25% of the time, so the purple-haired girl that owned the Haunter was unperturbed. When it didn’t appear like the Haunter had actually become paralyzed, Ryan’s shoulders sunk forward.

“Just great!” Ryan shouted. “Paralysis should work 100% of the time just like sleep!”

“Your fault for using that move,” the girl replied, smiling deviously.

“Even if the Haunter isn’t paralyzed, his speed is crippled,” Forrest whispered to Ryan. “It’s not over yet.”

Now it was Gillford’s turn. “Yeah, Deshawn Equinneus! Use your ultra powerful Water Gun on the Golem!”

And so, the Poliwrath thrust itself forward and shot a jet of water at the sleeping Pokemon. The attack hit Golem square in the face, doing massive damage, Ryan was sure. ''It’s a super effective move, after all. I guess Gillford isn’t as dumb as he looks.'' The first turn had ended in a decidedly bad place for Ryan and Forrest and their quest to return the Pewter City Museum’s fossils.

“Attack Haunter with an offensive move this time,” Forrest advised the teal-haired boy. “That’s our biggest threat, even with the Poliwrath having super effective moves to use against my Golem.”

“Right,” Ryan gulped. “Okay, Abra, this time use a Psychic attack on Haunter!”

Gillford was not one to be outdone. “Water Gun on the Abra now, Deshawn Equinneus! You are a tier 0 Pokemon! Blast that little half pint creature out of here!”

“Haunter, Dream Eater on the Golem now!” the Team Rocket girl ordered. “Let’s get this over with.”

Abra nodded in understanding and then shot a beam of psychic energy from his fingertip. The Haunter, slowed by Paralysis, was unable to move out of the way, even though it had just loosed its own attack. The psychic attack hit it, causing it to groan out in pain. But it did not faint. Still, Ryan thought it looked to be quite damaged now, and another good psychic attack could probably end the Haunter’s run on this battlefield.

“Brah, raaah!” Abra shouted triumphantly after his attack made contact with the Haunter. Just then, he was hit by by the Poliwrath’s Water Gun and knocked over. However, the attack didn’t seem to do that much damage to him, and he sprung back up a second later, looking perhaps a bit dazed.

Ryan gasped. “Are you okay Abra?”

“Ra.”

“Okay, hopefully that means you are. Now let’s focus on this Poliwrath!”

Still in the air, however, was the Haunter’s Dream Eater attack, bearing down on the sleeping Golem. Just before the attack reached Golem, the rock Pokemon curled up into a ball, and then jumped up into the air, awake. The Dream Eater attack, which of course only works on sleeping Pokemon, bounced harmlessly off of the Pokemon’s hard rock shell.

“Yeah, Golem!” Ryan cheered. “You woke up just in time!”

“Good work Golem,” Forrest said. “How are you feeling?” Golem shook his head and turned back to face his foes. “Well, he’s seen better days.” The Gym Leader turned to Ryan. “Listen Ryan, have your Abra attack Haunter again, and I’ll go after the Poliwrath.”

“Alright. Abra, let’s do another Psychic attack!”

“Rah!!”

“Golem, tackle the Poliwrath!” Forrest commanded.

“Show your true power to these tier 3 fools, Deshawn!” Gillford screamed, spittle flying from his mouth. He belongs in a mental institution, Ryan thought.

“Use Night Shade on Golem,” the girl ordered her Haunter.

Abra was the fastest, so his attack hit first. The Haunter, weakened and slowed, was unable to avoid another beam of psychic energy. It took the attack head on, screaming as a white light enveloped it. Ryan whooped. And when the smoke cleared, Haunter had sunk to near the ground, its eyes all swirly like a couple of sweet rolls.

“KO’d, yeah!” Ryan shouted. “We did it, Abra!”

“Abra, abra,” the Pokemon responded lazily.

“No! Dangit!” The purple-haired girl looked as angry as she did confused. “How did an Abra take out my Haunter? I’ve never seen an Abra that powerful before.”

Ryan beamed. “My dad raised him. He’s stronger than he looks.” Ryan gave his Pokemon a thumbs up. “Good work, buddy!”

But the fight was not yet over. Gillford yet stood against Ryan and Forrest. His Poliwrath took a massive hit from Golem’s Tackle attack, but he wounded the rock Pokemon severely with another Water Gun as well. When the turn was over, Golem looked like he was about to faint. Gillford’s Poliwrath, on the other hand, did not seem like it had been damaged all that much by the Golem’s Tackle attack. Abra, still fresh, would be the advantage for their side now, Ryan knew.

“Abra, use Psychic!” Ryan commanded.

“Golem, Tackle.”

“Destroy that Golem, Deshawn,” Gillford shouting and pointing like a madman at the rock Pokemon. “Water Gun! Quickly, go, go, go!”

It sucked for Gillford that his Pokemon was the slowest, for before Deshawn’s attack could be loosed, Abra hit him with a pink beam of energy, causing the blue-and-white Pokemon to fly backwards into the snow. The attack was massive, but it was not enough to KO the Poliwrath. Then came Golem, rolling forward like a boulder down a mountain. Before the Poliwrath could so much as stand up, he was hit brutally with another Tackle attack, and this time, he could not withstand it. Poliwrath fell over, no longer able to battle.

“We did it! We won!” Ryan shouted.

“Curses!” Gillford wept.

“Team Rocket will be back,” the girl said, her jaws clenched. “Just you wait, kid. Next time we’ll have more of our Pokemon with us, and you won’t win.”

“Cool,” said Ryan carelessly. “Now get out of here, before I have Abra use Psychic on you!”

The two Team Rocket lackeys cursed and then ran off into the snowy forest. Once they were gone, Forrest returned his Golem to its Pokeball and stepped forward, grabbing the bag that housed all of Pewter City’s precious Pokemon fossils. He bent down to scoop up all of the fossils that had spilled out, then slung the bag over his shoulder and turned around.

“Thanks,” he said to Ryan. “Those two were up to no good. It’s nice to know that there’s still people out there willing to fight evil.” Ryan didn’t know about that fancy moral mumbo jumbo, but he nodded anyways. “Oh and here, catch,” Forrest said, turning to throw two little bottles to Ryan. The boy caught them and looked at them curiously. “Awakening potions,” Forrest spoke. “Usually, we give these to Pokemon, but it seems like your friends over there are the ones who got put to sleep by Haunter.”

“Oh yeah… Rahul and Alex. I almost forgot about them. Thanks!”

“No problem. I’ll take these fossils back to the museum, but I’ll make sure everyone knows you helped me, Ryan. The road to Cerulean City is that way, by the way,” he said, pointing in the opposite direction.

“Thanks.”

Forrest nodded and then trudged off into the snow, back towards Pewter City.

Ryan moved forward to where Rahul and Alex lay like steely mannequins amongst the snow. As he went to kneel down, he caught a glint of gold in the snow, just at Alex’s feet. He reached down and plucked up a little mass of hard, semi-translucent material. It was golden and there appeared to be a mosquito trapped inside it.

“What is this, Dex?” Ryan asked.

“The fossilized resin of a tree from prehistoric trees, better known as Old Amber. It appears to contain the genes of an ancient Pokémon.”

“A fossil!” Ryan’s voice was filled with awe. “Hey, wait. Forrest?!” he stood up, looking for the Gym Leader, but the man had disappeared down the path. “Huh. Genes of an ancient Pokemon? I wonder which one?” The boy shook his head. “Maybe I could have Professor Oak or Dr. Michio Kaku help me revive this guy sometime.”

But he knew that neither man would be in Cerulean City. So Ryan pocketed the little fossil and knelt down to wake Rahul and Alex up.

The three boys, Alex, Rahul, and Ryan, made their way through Route 3 at a brisk pace. Just an hour or so after the battle against Team Rocket, they were already approaching the end of the route. Having not met any other trainers or wild Pokemon to battle, they had breezed through the route. As they were walking, they saw the visage of a large cave system appear before them, with a Pokemon Center just to the left of it.

“We’ve made it!” Rahul said. “Yes! See Alex, I told you we could get to Cerulean City by the end of the day.”

Alex was unimpressed. “We still need to pass through Mt. Moon and Route 4.”

“Don’t be a downer,” Rahul scolded. “We are so getting there today.”

“Hey, look!” Ryan said, pointing at the snow-covered trees to their right. “There’s Pokemon in there. We should catch them!” The dark shapes of bird-like Pokemon could be seen in the small collection of trees. There were dozens of them in the trees, but every one of them sat completely motionless.

Alex shook his head. “I only catch Pokemon that are useful. There aren’t any useful Pokemon on Route 3. Those are just Spearows or Pidgeottos, most likely. Useless for competitive battles.”

“Aw come on,” Ryan complained. “I want to catch a bunch of Pokemon. Even if I don’t use them all in battles, it’d still be nice to have them. Not everything has to revolve around battles! What do you think, Rahul?”

Rahul was staring down at the little strip of paper that had Officer Jenny’s number on it. “Uh, yeah, okay. Let’s catch Pokemon.”

Ryan sent out Aegon. Rahul threw a ball that produced a Magneton.

Ryan smirked. “I bet I can catch one first.”

Rahul stood still as a statue of buddha. Then, a small smile crept onto his face. “You’re on.”

And so they went. Ryan and his Charmeleon trudged through the tall grass together, looking for any and all wild Pokemon. He was particularly keen on having his Pokemon challenge the birds he had seen sitting in the trees, so Aegon just burnt his way through all of the Rattatas and Mankeys he found in the tall grass. Then, Ryan and his Pokemon came to the edge of one of the trees, and there above them sat a Pidgeotto perched upon a twisted branch, looking down at them scornfully.

“Okay, Aegon, this is the one I want to catch. Don’t burn him up too much.”

“Meleon, char!”

Aegon, the loyal beast, rushed up the tree and knocked the Pidgeotto over with Scratch attack. The Pidgeotto squawked and fell into the tall grass. When Aegon chased it down there, it sprung up and defended itself with a Quick Attack. Aegon was hurt by this, as any Pokemon would be, but the damage was minimal, Ryan knew. His Pokemon was at a much higher level than the wild Pokemon he was trying to catch.

“One more Scratch,” Ryan commanded. I don’t want this Pidgeotto to faint.

After another swipe of Aegon’s claw, the Pidgeotto’s feathers became ruffled, and it looked like it was getting tired. ''Perfect. Let’s catch this guy.''

Ryan wished he had a hat so he could spin it around and do a little twirl. As it was, he simply threw a Pokeball right at the Pidgeotto. The ball opened, and the Pidgeotto was sucked inside. The red-and-white ball jiggled back and forth two or three times, and then split open, cracking to pieces. The Pidgeotto flew out majestically and returned to its perch on the tree. Ryan threw another ball at it, but the Pidgeotto just batted it aside with its wing.

“Just give up! I’ll catch you!” Ryan warned it. “This would go a lot faster if you just stayed inside the ball.”

But the Pidgeotto turned its head away to ignore Ryan. When he tried to throw two more Pokeballs, they were slapped aside just as the second ball had been. The boy sighed.

“I didn’t want to have to use up all of my ultra balls, especially against weak Pokemon like this, but it looks like I have no choice! Come on, Pidgeotto! Join my team!!”

He threw one of his few remaining ultra balls (in truth, these balls had once belonged to his father) at the bird Pokemon. This time, Pidgeotto was not able to bat away the black-and-yellow ball. It was sucked inside, and though it squirmed around in that ball for several seconds, eventually even that stopped. The light surrounding the ball dimmed, and it fell from the tree, to the tall grass. Aegon scampered over and retrieved it for Ryan, before returning it to him.

“There we go!” Ryan said, running back to Rahul and Alex. “Look, I caught a Pidgeotto!”

Rahul was unimpressed. He held up three balls. “I got three Spearows.”

“Aw, come on! Pidgeotto is way harder to catch than those things.”

“That wasn’t the challenge,” Rahul noted, laughing. “It was whoever caught the first Pokemon wins. I win. What do I win?”

“Three useless Pokemon,” Alex grumbled.

The three trainers stayed in the tall grass for a little while longer, training up all of their Pokemon on the wild species that could be found on Route 3. As the day wore on, a man in a business suit and with a bluetooth device stuck in his left ear came walking down the road from the Pokemon Center. He had an old rod slung over his left shoulder and was talking to someone on his bluetooth device. When he spotted the three, he called them over.

“Hello gentlemen,” the man said pleasantly. “My name is Ken. I am an experienced Pokemon breeder and fisher!” he said, patting his old rod. “Would any of you be interested in purchasing the Pokemon I have for sale?”

“What do you have for sale?” Rahul asked.

“I’m a Magikarp salesman!” the man beamed. He opened his fancy grey jacket to reveal a Magikarp hanging by a hook on the inside of his jacket. “For just 2000 Pokedollars, this fine specimen can be yours! What do you say?” he said warmly, a wide, toothy smile forming across his shaven face.

“This guy is shady,” Alex said.

“It’s just a Magikarp,” Rahul said in disbelief.

“This is a fine Magikarp! It is one of the most powerful Pokemon you can hope to use! You guys are going to Cerulean City, right?” The three nodded. “Well, I’ll tell ya, this guy will be your ticket to a Cascade Badge, guaranteed!”

Alex shook his head. “Magikarp is one of the worst Pokemon to use against that gym. He has pitiful strength, plus no type advantages.”

The man scowled at Alex. “Don’t listen to your friend,” he said to Ryan and Rahul. “This Magikarp is a lot stronger than he looks. Heck, I’d even go so far as to call him jolly.”

Magikarp convulsed slightly, and Ryan thought he heard a “Carp, carp, carp,” escape from the thing’s lips. “Why does it look sick?” Ryan asked. “Its color is wrong. Aren’t Magikarp supposed to be orange? This one’s yellow.”

The salesman’s lip trembled. “Uh, don’t forget, you can get rich off of this Pokemon! Just breed him with other Magikarp, and you will have yourself a very lucrative business! The market is full of people who want to buy Magikarp… and not just for battling, but for food! Magikarp are very tasty.”

“Come on, let’s go,” Alex said. Rahul nodded in agreement, and the two began to walk off.

Ryan, on the other hand, stood. ''Magikarp is a pathetic Pokemon. But Magikarp evolves into Gyarados… maybe it would be better to buy this Magikarp instead of having to worry about catching one later on. I don’t even like fishing.'' “I’ll pay 500,” Ryan said, finally.

The man’s eyes lit up. “1500! Not a Pokepenny less! I swear I’ll walk away right now!”

“1000-”

“Deal!” the man said before Ryan could even finish speaking. The trainer frowned. ''He’s desperate to get rid of it. Man, I could’ve talked him down more…''

“Here,” Ryan said, a little annoyed, handing the man the money. Most of the money he had won from the previous gym battle was now gone. Ryan knew he’d have to earn some more money soon if he wanted to be able to buy food and stay in hotels with the Rahul and Alex.

The man licked his lips and grabbed the cash. Then, he handed Ryan the yellow Magikarp. The boy took out a Pokeball and quickly put his new Pokemon inside it.

“No refunds!” Ken the salesman said as soon as it was over. And before Ryan could so much as say another word, the man in the business suit was already sprinting off down the road in the other direction, as if a horde of Tauros was chasing him.

Ryan rejoined the others, and saw Rahul looking at him strangely. “Why did you buy it? Magikarp aren’t worth that much.”

The boy replied, “Hey, every Magikarp becomes a Gyarados some day. And Gyarados is one of the coolest Pokemon ever.”

“Yeah, I guess. But I’d rather get a Gyarados than a Magikarp. It’ll be annoying to have to train it before it evolves,” the big man pointed out.

He’s right about that, Ryan thought. But hopefully this Magikarp will evolve soon.

The three made their way to the Pokecenter, where they rested their Pokemon for a few hours. Ryan used the nearby PC to exchange Clawey for the Pidgeotto he had just caught. He made sure to give his Pidgeotto, who was a female Pidgeotto, a name: Swirlie Whirlie. This was a name Ryan had always wanted to name a Pidgeotto if he ever caught one, but he didn’t know where that name had come from nor how he had thought of it.

He put Magikarp into storage too, thinking that he could focus on training that water Pokemon after he won his next badge. Just as he had done with his Pidgeotto, Ryan gave his new Magikarp a name: Shenlong. That name, he knew, would be more apt, once his lil yellow fish evolved.

As this was going on, Alex and Rahul went to the far side of the Pokecenter, way in the back, where there was a small mart to buy things. Alex bought some trail mix, and Ryan saw that Rahul was purchasing things too, but he didn’t stay to see what they were. Instead, he returned outside, to the frost-coated air of evening. ''Abra, Charmeleon, Dragonair, Tauros, Cloyster, and Pidgeotto. Not my final team, but a good team, I hope. I’ve gotta level these guys up fast. The tournament is almost here.''

He almost toyed with letting his new Pidgeotto out then and there. But at that moment, Alex and Rahul came walking out. When Ryan turned to face them, he burst out in laughter. There stood Rahul, the big man, in a blue t-shirt with a picture of the Ninth Doctor on it, in all his glory. And upon Rahul’s face was a ponyta beanie with large eyes. He had pulled the beanie down over his face and taken his glasses off to put over those bright fake eyes on the hat. Ryan had no idea how Rahul could see, but he was impressed, nonetheless.

“I am the Doctor…!” Rahul roared, thrusting his sonic screwdriver into the sky. He was so proud of himself, which made Ryan laugh even harder.

Alex stood nibbling trail mix next to the big man; there was a knowing, perhaps bemused look in his eye. “This is the first I’ve heard of him being a fan of My Little Ponyta.”

“Hey, it’s a great show!” Rahul countered. “But Doctor Who is the best!” It wasn’t easy having no shame.

Seeing that they were losing the light of day, the three then ran over to the entrance to Mt. Moon, which was just to the right of the Pokecenter. However, when they got there, they saw a tall man with dark skin, long black hair, and large, defined muscles, standing in their way. He wore only the pants of a gi, as well as a black belt, and he had a serious look upon his face. When the three reached him, the man held up his hand.

“The way is shut. Mt. Moon is closed for renovations right now.”

“Hey, who are you to stop us?” Rahul asked, angrily.

“My name is Bruno. I am the one tasked with preventing trainers from entering Mt. Moon right now. As I already said, the cave is being renovated. No one is allowed inside.”

“Then how are we going to get to Cerulean City?” Ryan asked. “The map says this is is the only way there!”

Bruno, his body as still as a statue, pointed to his left. “My Onix dug a hole through the mountainside over there. There is a path through there to lead you to Route 4 and Cerulean City.”

“Alright, let’s go then,” Ryan said quickly.

“Fine,” said Rahul, still eyeing Bruno suspiciously. “Mt. Moon sucks anyways. There’re too many fairy Pokemon in there.”

“Be quiet, Rahul,” Alex said sternly. “There are no fairy type Pokemon in Generation 1.”

“Oh yeah. I forgot.” Rahul looked at Ryan. “Fairy type Pokemon are overpowered. Don’t forget that. If I could, I would ban them all.”

Alex shrugged. “Not really. I don’t have a strong opinion about them either way, but they aren’t that bad. You just hate them because they counter your Dragon Pokemon.”

Rahul and Alex argued for the rest of the trip through the Onix hole. Ryan was just glad that they were going to get to Cerulean City that day. He didn’t know what a fairy Pokemon was, or why it produced such rage in Rahul and his Ponyta beanie. When they got through the path - it took no more than a few minutes - the three trainers beheld the sprawling rocky, hilly region of Route 4. Beyond… Cerulean City loomed.

As Ryan stepped forward, he noticed that there were perhaps a dozen trainers milling about down the path, in the lower hills and valleys. He looked over at Alex and Rahul and then pulled out two Pokeballs. “Hey, why don’t we practice a bit on these other trainers before heading to the Gym? My Pokemon could use the experience.” And I could use the victory money…

Alex shrugged. “You should each take half.” The two trainers nodded and stepped forward. “Oh and Ryan, you should work on leveling up your Tauros when you can. He’s a beast at high levels, and I haven’t seen you using him much.”

“Y-yeah, I guess!” replied Ryan as he scratched the back of his head. “I guess I just forgot about Tauros! But you’re right. I need to level him up! These trainer battles will provide some nice experience for him.” He dropped the two balls he was holding back into his bag and took Tauros’ out. “Alright, Tauros, I choose you!”

Out came Ryan’s massive bull Pokemon. The boy ran up to Tauros and pet him on the neck. “Hey boy, I’ve missed you. Wanna stretch your legs? Battle a few Pokemon?”

The Tauros Ryan had named NaVorro stamped a foot into the ground and grunted. Ryan knew what that meant. He jumped on Tauros’ back and then pointed forward. “Okay, down the mountain, Tauros! Not too fast, though. I don’t want to fly off. Let’s reach those trainers before Rahul!”

Rahul took out his Dragonair and then got on its back, perhaps trying to do the same thing as Ryan. Yet Dragonair was a much smaller Pokemon than Tauros, and Rahul was a much bigger guy than Ryan. So needless to say, when the two began their race to the bottom of the mountain, Ryan and his Tauros got there a lot quicker, and that gave Ryan just a little more time train his Pokemon for the next gym. It was a small, but in Ryan’s mind, a much needed advantage.

Persian was staring at them when they entered the smoky, low-lit room. The magnificently-groomed Pokemon stood perched, never moving, never blinking, its eyes trained on them, lest they make the wrong move. The two of them bowed low, keeping their heads down until they heard the voice of their master speak.

“Rise,” he spoke after several moments. His voice was old and tired, a result of all the years he spent smoking cigars and drinking heavily. The two stood up and looked at their master, who sat in a chair of painted leather. His face was obscured by the darkness of the room, though they could see his eyes shining through, piercing into their souls.

“I’m s-sorry,” she said, bowing again. “We failed. We were able to capture the fossils, but several trainers tracked us down and took them back before we could return them to you, sir.”

“We will make it up, I swear!” the boy at her side shouted in earnest. “I promise, sir. We’ll capture the most powerful Pokemon in the world for you!”

“Quiet,” she said, slapping the boy across the face. Turning to face her master, she winced, preparing for the berating that would come from her partner’s insolence. She half expected the Persian to jump down from its perch above their master’s desk.

The man coughed himself into a fit that built itself into something bordering on theatrics. She wasn’t sure if he was strong enough to withstand such a barrage, but as soon as she stepped forward to comfort her ailing master, he raised a hand and stopped coughing. She saw him holding a handkerchief, and thought she saw dark stains on it. In the low, brown light of the room, she could not be sure.

Her master wiped his mouth with his handkerchief and then spoke, “You two have disappointed me. I should punish you… But there’s no time for that. Here,” he said, leaning forward to hand her a set of tablets. Each one turned on as she touched it, revealing a legendary Pokemon on its screen. “Lugia… Moltres… Zapdos… Mew,” the man said, as she cycled through the list. Each looked familiar, except the last. The Mew was not the familiar pink color she was used to. No, it was blue.

“Why is this Mew a different color?”

Her master shook his head. “Eyewitness reports all state that the Mew that has been spotted recently is blue. If it is a mirage or some kind of freak of nature is for you to figure out.” He leaned back, coughing some more. “Now go, you two. Attached to each file is a list of locations each Pokemon has been spotted at. You will not return to me until you have found and captured at least one of these Legendary Pokemon. Do you understand?” His voice was thin and careful, menacing as a razor laid against flesh. When they nodded, he continued, “Gillford and Jessica… you two are my last hope, the last hope of this organization. Team Rocket needs you to be successful. There can be no more failures. None. Do not disappoint me again.”

The two bowed, and exited the room. Jessica kept her eyes on the Persian as she walked out, still feeling anxious that it could, at any moment, jump from its perch and attack her. That’s how it used to be in the old days. I’m so stupid, she thought angrily. ''Persian died years ago. Giovanni had him stuffed. There’s no point in being afraid of ghosts.'' She reached for the Pokeball hooked to her belt, feeling it over instinctively. At the same time, she looked at the two tablets she held (she had given the other two to Gillford to study); no matter how much she tried to look at the others, her mind and eyes kept coming back to that blue Mew. There was something about it, something different - something special.

''That’s the Pokemon that will help Team Rocket rise from the ashes once again. That’s our ticket to immortality.''

Jessica grabbed Gillford by the shoulder and pulled him over to her, pointing at the blue Mew on her screen. “Forget the others. We’re going to find this one.”

“Where was it last seen?” Gillford asked. “And is it a strong one? Tier 0? Well, it should be at least Tier 1. Come on, tell me, what are its stats? Can it break through the fabric of time?”

Jessica ignored him and scrolled down to the last known sightings of the Mew.

“Lavender Town,” she breathed. She looked up at Gillford and smiled. “Looks like we’re going home.”

Episode 19: The One That Got Away
The sun just beginning to set behind them, Ryan, Rahul, and Alex made their triumphant entrance into Cerulean City. Ryan rode atop his noble NaVorro, fresh off the spoils of victorious battle. He thumbed the Pokedollars through his fingers, savoring the sweet cash he had just made by wrecking all those noobs on Route 4. He was certain NaVorro, as well as his other Pokebuddies, had gained a level or two in those battles.

Coming into the city, the three found themselves, for the most part, alone. Most shops were closing up, most trainers were retiring to their homes or hotels, and there were few bystanders left milling about. Not the welcoming party I had hoped for, Ryan thought to himself.

As they passed by a small building, the smell of roasting meat and aromatic spices drifted through the air. Ryan’s mouth began to water, and as he looked over at Rahul, he could almost hear the big man’s stomach grumbling.

“Come on, Alex! Let’s get some dinner. I’m starving.”

“You’re always starving.”

Yet, dinner they got. Rahul ordered for them, while Ryan and Alex stood back, watching the few people still out and about drift through the paved streets like leaves down a lazy river. Sitting at a table just outside the little food shoppe was a middle-aged man wearing a velvet shirt, grey sweatpants, and glasses (which Ryan thought were women’s glasses). He was a bald man, stocky and short and hunched over. On his table was a newspaper and a plate, on which appeared to be a block of cheddar cheese. As a side, the man had a platter of fries, crisp and golden like a deep fried Magikarp. The man was eating from this block of cheese, as if it were a normal thing to do, muttering to himself, pointing this way and that, as if he was bebopping and scatting and about to lose it. Yet, that was not the thing that drew Ryan’s eye to this man. No, that was the Squirtle who had appeared at that man’s feet.

It was a quick little bugger, that Squirtle. Darting up to the table, it took the opposite seat of the bald man, reached up and began to nibble on some fries. The man in the velvet shirt did not notice this at first. Ryan elbowed Alex softly, alerting the small Chinese Pokemon Master to what was going on, and in silence and awe, the two watched as the Squirtle ate more and more of the man’s fries without getting caught.

It should also be mentioned at this point that the Squirtle was wearing a wig - it was a wig of red, curly hair, long enough to grace the skull of an older Jewish woman. How this wig had found itself upon the Squirtle’s head is a question not for us, the readers, but a question for the great philosophers - the Nietzches and Kierkegaards and Kanye Wests of our time. Certainly, Ryan and Alex had no idea what was going on.

Just then, the bald man looked up and caught sight of the rascally Tiny Turtle Pokemon. The man let out a cry, half disgust and half outrage, and flung his newspaper onto the ground. Standing up and grasping onto his block of cheese, he pointed at the Squirtle. His voice caught in his throat, and every time he tried to talk and found that he couldn’t, his little round head (which looked like a polished orange) bounced up and down and his face got redder and redder. The man took large, quick bites out of his block of cheese and then flung it away. He dashed forward, gathered up his platter of fries and began to devour them hastily. All this time, Ryan noticed how the bald man had not let his eyes leave the Squirtle’s.

Eating like a madman, the bald guy said, “Hey, don’t tell me how to eat!” He cocked his head sideways and grunted; it seemed like, to the teal-haired trainer watching this, that the man was about to burst a blood vessel.

“Squirtle squirt,” came the reply, dry as the Boneway in midsummer.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” the man sputtered. He threw the rest of his fries onto the ground and stepped forward, raising a fist into the air as if he was about to pray to the heavens for rain.

“Whoa, dude. Chill out,” Ryan said, stepping forward. “Why don’t you take your Squirtle back home before you embarrass yourself?”

The man’s face was flushed a delicate shade of purple. Ryan thought he looked like an eggplant. “Mind your own business, kid. This is between me and my mother!”

Alex was in disbelief. “Mother? That’s a Squirtle.”

“Huh?” the man said, clearly flustered. He pivoted back and forth, looking from the Squirtle to Ryan and Alex and back again. After a few seconds, he straightened up, loosened the collar of his velvet shirt, and twitched his head in surprise. “Well… I suppose you’re right. That is indeed… a Squirtle. I-if you don’t mind, I will be leaving.”

And with that, the man began to walk away at a brisk pace, one that was surprising for such a pear-shaped individual.

“Hey, don’t forget your Squirtle!” Ryan shouted after him.

“I don’t have a Squirtle,” the man replied. “I don’t own any Pokemon!”

“Huh?”

“It’s not a lie if you believe it!” the bald man shouted before scurrying off into the growing darkness. “Don’t trust anyone in capes! Mark my words!”

Ryan cocked his head to the side. “What the heck just happened?”

“Beats me,” Alex shrugged.

Just then, Rahul appeared with three plates of food - sandwiches with fries (and Rahul had gotten himself a few extra portions of fries). The three sat down outside as the sun faded behind the horizon, talking over strategies for the next gym and for the Indigo League Tournament. Ryan let Abra out of his Pokeball and let the little guy have some of his food.

“Rahul already has his final team… but a few more of them need to evolve,” Alex said as he ate his salami sandwich with chopsticks. “On the other hand, you need to make sure you have your final team soon, so you can start training them more intensely and make sure they all evolve into their final forms,” he told Ryan.

“I have Myrrah and NaVorro and Thurnax and Abra and Aegon. And I’m thinking about catching a Haunter or Gengar too.”

“Your Aegon is the weakest member of your team, but it should be alright. Rahul has a Charizard too.”

“Yeah I think I’ll go with him. I just need a Gengar and then I can level everyone else up, especially you, buddy,” Ryan said, patting his Abra on the head.

Abra, who was munching on a long fry, looked up annoyed and then continued to eat as if he was suspended in molasses.

“Your Abra is strange,” Alex spoke. “Why hasn’t it evolved already?”

“I don’t know,” the teal-haired boy said. “Maybe he doesn’t want to yet. He’ll evolve whenever he wants to. I won’t force him to.”

“Come on, let’s get to the hotel,” Rahul grunted. The other two looked over and saw that their friend had already finished his meal. Despite having much more to eat than Ryan or Alex, Rahul had completely devoured everything on his plate. And the two of them were not even halfway done. “Doctor Who is on in twenty minutes. I’m not missing it!”

“Stop being so impatient,” Alex scolded. “Some of us can’t eat as fast as you.” He turned to Ryan. “If that’s your final team, you will need to make sure you give each one the optimal moveset.”

“What’s that?” the boy replied.

“Well, it’s different for each Pokemon. And, to be fair, it will require you to get several TM moves for them. But it’s worth it. Especially for Tauros.” Alex leaned down and wrote some words on his napkin, then gave it to Ryan to look at. “These are what I’ve found to be the best moves for the Pokemon you have right now. Others would probably disagree, because there’s no perfect moveset for any Pokemon. But this is just what I think would be the best for you.”

Ryan looked over the napkin. He winced as he saw how many TMs he would have to purchase: Body Slam, Hyper Beam, Earthquake, Blizzard, Thunderbolt, Explosion, Mega Drain, Swords Dance, and Fire Blast. Funnily enough, the only Pokemon whom Alex did not recommend changing any moves for was Abra. Guess Dad knew what he was doing, after all. It made Ryan feel a little guilty that he needed Alex to tell him the movesets for his Pokemon, for he was sure his father had come up with the list for Abra and his other Pokemon on his own.

“Well,” said Ryan, sighing, “this’ll cost a lot of money, and I’ll have to look all over for these TMs. I have no idea where they are.”

“You’re not in that much of a rush,” Alex reminded him. The two looked over at Rahul, who was rattling his knuckles on the table. The big man was clearly in a rush. Doctor Who waits for no man. “The Tournament isn’t for a few more months. You’ll have plenty of time to search around for these moves. You will be able to buy most of them in Pokecenters, I believe.”

Once they were done eating, the four got up to leave when suddenly the Squirtle in the wig came darting over from the table it had been sitting at. It grabbed Alex’s plate and ran off with it, hoping to eat the last crumbs and remnants of food that the small Asian boy had left.

“Well, that was rude,” Alex said, but he didn’t seem to mind.

The Squirtle came running at them again, a moment later. He first went for Rahul, but seeing that the boy had left not even a crumb on his plate, he instead turned to Ryan and Abra. Abra was still holding Ryan’s platter of fries and was eating from it quite slowly. The Pokemon made its way for Abra and scooped the little basket of goodies right out of his hand.

“Abra?! Rah, bra!” Abra shrieked. He ran after Squirtle into the darkness, behind the food shoppe. A second later, a bright pink flash of light and a shout of pain followed.

“Hey, Abra!” Ryan yelled, running after his Pokemon. Rahul and Alex followed close behind.

When they rounded the corner, the three trainers were met by pitch black. Ryan reached into his bag and grabbed a flashlight. Shining it into the darkness, he saw Abra standing there, eating golden, crispy fries from the platter. He stood uncaring over the unconscious body of Squirtle.

“Whoa, Abra, why’d you do that?” his trainer asked.

“Abra, ra, ra, ra, bra, abra. Abra, ra. Ra, abra!” the Abra said earnestly.

“Come on, we’ve gotta get to the hotel!” Rahul whined.

“Fine,” Ryan replied. “Come on Abra, let’s go.”

“Ra.”

“And…” the trainer said, a small grin forming on his face. “Let’s not forget the Pokemon you just captured for me, buddy!”

Ryan threw a Pokeball at the unconscious Squirtle. In a second, the Tiny Turtle Pokemon was overcome by a strong white light and sucked inside.

“Whoo baby! That’s another one for me! I’ve caught so many Pokemon! I’m so good at this!”

The others didn’t seem to care. Instead, Rahul led them frantically to the hotel they would be staying at so that he would not miss his precious show. As to if Rahul actually got to watch Doctor Who on time, Ryan never learned. For as soon as he settled down in the hotel and took off his backpack, he made his way back out into the night, towards the Pokecenter. He had to make sure his new Squirtle got healed before the morning came, after all.

Two Chanseys were playing ping pong when Ryan entered the Cerulean City Pokecenter. The one nearest Ryan scored an ace just as the boy walked inside and it screamed like Ryan had never heard an animal scream before. It was less celebratory than it was deathly, in the boy’s observation.

He made his way up to the desk, where a Nurse Joy sat snoozing in her office chair. One slap of the bell on the countertop awoke her like a bucket of cold water being thrown upon her head.

“H-huh, what’s going?!” the pink-haired woman asked Ryan.

“I need one of my Pokemon healed,” the boy explained.

“It’s late,” the Nurse Joy yawned. Ryan thought she looked mighty cute when she yawned.

“But this is urgent! I just caught him.”

Nurse Joy nodded. Taking the Pokeball, she handed it to a Chansey lurking behind her. “It’ll be an hour or so,” she said sleepily. “You can wait in the waiting room while we attend to your Pokemon if you wish.” Ryan went to leave when suddenly, the Nurse Joy leaned over the counter and spoke again, “Wait a minute. You wouldn’t happen to be Ryan Morgan, would you?”

Ryan’s eyes narrowed in confusion. “How do you know that?”

“I was told to be on the lookout for a boy with blue hair. That’s you, right?” Ryan nodded. “Okay, I have a video message for you from your mother. She asked me to keep it until you reached Cerulean City. Do you want to see it now?”

Ryan nodded curtly. A video screen on the other side of the room turned on, and Ryan walked over to it, to get a little privacy. Then, a message began to play. There his mother sat, in her Sunday best, still as a sleeping Goldeen, in the living room of their house.

“Hi Ryan, this is your mother. I know you are busy collecting Gym Badges, but I would like you to return home as soon as you can. Your father and I need to speak with you about something. Please come as soon as you can, and make sure you bring Abra. Please hurry, Ryan.” She paused, looking down briefly, then returned her gaze to the screen. Ryan could see the glimmer of tears in his mother’s eyes. “I’m proud of you, Ryan. I really am. You’re doing so great collecting all of the badges. I love you very much. But please come soon. We can’t wait much longer. Goodbye.”

And with that, the video feed cut. Ryan didn’t know what to think. ''What’s going on? Why do they want to see me and bring Abra too? And why was she crying? Was it because of me getting all those badges so far… or something else?'' The boy had no clue. It was bizarre, though, that he was getting this message now, after all those messages he left for his parents without getting a response in the days and weeks before. He realized at that moment that he hadn’t spoken to or seen his parents since the day he set out on his Pokemon journey. That was a lifetime ago.

While waiting for Squirtle to be healed, Ryan went over to the Pokecenter’s small shop in the back right corner of the building. When he saw a section for HMs and TMs, Ryan took out the napkin Alex had given him and looked for any and all TMs he would need.

“Alright!” he whispered after a few moments. Holding up two canisters containing the moves “Swords Dance” and “Fire Blast”, Ryan knew he had found two moves for his Charmeleon. When he reached the counter, and the man told him it would cost him 2000 Pokedollars, Ryan nearly had a heart attack.

“I only have 2000 left!” The boy’s voice rang with horror.

“Well, either use that to buy the moves or put them back,” the cashier replied in annoyance.

“Fine.” Ryan handed him the money. ''Aegon better be happy about this. Now I can’t even buy anything to eat until I get my next badge. All that battling on Route 4, and I blow it in one day. But it’s for the greater good. Aegon needs these moves.''

Ryan returned to the waiting room, watching the fierce battle between the two Chanseys for a while longer. The Chansey nearest the door was the far superior ping pong player, and it destroyed the other one in back to back to back games. That was as long as Ryan paid attention. He tried to read a magazine and sleep, but he couldn’t shake the thought of what his mother said. So instead of sitting there, Ryan got up and began to pace.

It was near midnight by the time Squirtle was healed.

“Here you go!” Nurse Joy said cheerfully.

Now it was Ryan’s turn to be tired. This was far, far past his bedtime, especially considering he was going to participate in a Gym Battle in the morning. He took the Pokeball and put it into storage, sending Squirtle all the way back home. I’ll be there soon. Then, he gave his new Pokemon the fancy name of “Georgie Boy”.

Feeling the call of sleep tugging at his eyes, Ryan stumbled out of the Pokecenter and returned to the hotel, where he found Rahul and Alex already fast asleep. Rahul had the remnants of some kind of food on his wife beater. Ryan, however, did not order anything to eat from room service before going to sleep. Though his stomach rumbled, he had no more money. He knew he’d have to wait until the morning. ''I’ll challenge Misty first thing in the morning. Rahul won’t get to go first this time.''

And when Ryan got into bed, despite his hunger and the anxiety his mother’s message had given him, he fell asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow.

In the morning, Ryan got up before the others had even begun to stir and ran all the way to the Cerulean City Gym. The air was bitterly cold, and it stung his face as he ran; yet, as soon as Ryan entered the gym, he was hit with a blast of warm air. ''This is the water gym… why is it so hot in here? This is more like Cinnabar than Cerulean.'' The boy’s questions were soon answered when he came to the great indoor pool. There, at the far end, stood the gym leader Ryan knew to be Misty - she was a young woman with spiky red hair and a two-piece bathing suit on. In the water, floated several kids and aspiring trainers, it appeared. Most of them had flotation devices around them - like tubes or smaller pouches on their arms. Ryan figured he would have to fight them too, if the past gyms had been any indication. From the waters rose steam, evidence of the pool being heated in these cold winter days. Ryan was happy for that, at least. Misty was smarter than she looked.

“I’m here to challenge you!” Ryan shouted across the water.

Misty was standing at the base of a white plastic chair elevated by a staircase. She began walking down the stairs as she spoke, “I bet you’re here for this, aren’t you?” she asked, holding up a shiny blue speck that looked like a teardrop. “Well, if you want it, you have to beat me first.”

“I’ll beat you!” Ryan replied. “I’m a great Pokemon trainer.”

Misty laughed. “We’re not going to do a standard battle like you have participated in with the other gyms. If you want to win yourself a Cascade Badge, you’re going to need to beat me in a water race! So, are you up for that?”

“A water race?” That was the last thing Ryan expected. He knew he could beat her Pokemon with his own. He had trained them well. But this… a race? He didn’t like his chances.

“If you’re too scared,” Misty said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, “the door’s behind you.”

“I’m not scared! I’ll do it!”

“Then get changed into your swimming pants and we can get started. You get one Pokemon to ride on, so choose wisely.”

Ryan scampered off into the dressing room, which was in an enclave on the right side of the building. Once he had changed into his old pair of swimming pants, which were black with white tropical flowers lining the top, Ryan stepped out and contemplated which Pokemon he could use. ''I have Myrrah, Clawey, Shenlong, and Georgie Boy… but none of them are very high levels. Myrrah’s the most experienced one, but I don’t think I could ride on her shell… wait! Thurnax knows Surf! I wonder if that’s okay.'' He looked down, grasped onto his Dragonair’s Pokeball, and began to walk forward, when Ryan ran into someone. Stumbling backwards, he looked up and beheld a face he had not expected to see here of all places.

“Hi… Ryan, right?”

“Y-yeah,” the boy replied. “But what are you doing here, Ash?”

The young man smiled devilishly. “Just visiting. How’s Tauros?”

“He’s good. I’ve been training him a lot. He’ll be really strong by the time the tournament comes around.”

“I’ll be watching to see,” Ash replied. “Did you get your Cascade Badge yet?”

“No, not yet. I’m about to. Well, first I have to do a water race or something. I’m not entirely sure.”

Ash shook his head. “Be careful. Misty’s a great racer. She won the Tour de Alto Mare about twelve years ago,” he said. “Don’t underestimate her.”

“But what can I do? I’ve never been in a race before in my life!”

“Make sure you have a high level Pokemon. They have better speed.” Ash patted Ryan on the shoulder. “You’ll do fine. Hundreds of trainers get this badge every year. You will too. It’s not a big deal.”

That’s easy for him to say. “Alright, thanks Ash. I’ll see you around.”

Ryan returned to the pool with a towel slung over his shoulder and Thurnax’s Pokeball in his hand. There were now floating balls of orange and white that dotted the waters, forming the lanes for the Pokemon to race through. Across from him, on the other side of the pool, Misty sat on a Gyarados - as magnificent and terrifying a Pokemon as there was. Ryan found himself longing for Shenlong to evolve.

After letting Thurnax out of her ball, Ryan jumped on her back and ordered her to swim over the Gyarados. Thurnax did so obediently. Once the two Pokemon and their riders were lined up, Misty looked over at Ryan. “Whenever you’re ready…” she said.

Ryan nodded. He leaned forward, and whispered to his Dragonair, “Just go as fast as you can, Thurnax. Use all of your speed. But don’t use it all at once. Swim steady.” It was then Ryan remembered that Dragonair and the evolutionary line Dragonair came from was not one renowned for speed. Too late now. “Put all your concentration into swimming fast and smooth. Follow the lanes, and you’ll do great. I believe in you, Thurnax.” He patted his Dragonair on the back. “We’re winning this thing.”

Thurnax went, “Neieieieieie,” as she was wont to do.

“Alright, let’s race.”

Out of nowhere, a Pikachu riding a Squirtle came flying into view. The Pikachu had a whistle in its mouth and a white flag in its hand.

“Pikachu’ll be the referee,” Misty explained. “Just follow him as soon as he blows that whistle.”

Ryan nodded. He took a deep breath and held onto Thurnax tight. And then, he heard the shrill whistle echo through the hall. They were off.

“Go, Thurnax, go! Race to victory!” Ryan screamed. It was a familiar scream, one that made him think of Olivia. She was pretty; even prettier than Misty.

“Don’t let up, Gyarados,” Misty shouted. Her Pokemon growled and lowered itself further into the water.

It began to pull away from Ryan and Thurnax, and by the first bend in the path, Gyarados had outpaced them by almost a yard. Thurnax lowered herself into the water, just as her opponent had, though she barely kept pace.

After the first turn, the water swirling around them, Ryan and his Dragonair were met by a trainer floating in the pool. “Heck yeah, Seaking! Waterfall attack!”

“Dodge it!” Ryan clung to his Pokemon’s neck as hard as he could. When the Seaking dove under the surface and then came roaring up on plumes of water, Thurnax jumped out of the water, arcing in the air like a rainbow, before landing beyond the Pokemon and its trainer. “Great job! Keep going!”

Gyarados was now pulling away from them even more, and Ryan didn’t know what else his Pokemon could do. ''Dragonairs aren’t known for their speed. I was so stupid choosing Thurnax for this. She’s trying her best, but it’s just not going to cut it.''

Zig-zagging through the lanes, Ryan and Thurnax dodged other trainers’ attacks - Starmies and Staryus shot Water Guns at them, and Seakings and Seadras attacked them from beneath the waters. Somehow I don’t think Misty’s having the same problems. Indeed, the red-headed woman and her Pokemon were nearly the length of Dragonair’s body in front of them. The Pikachu kept weaving in between the two racers on his loyal Squirtle, squeaking “Pika pika!” and waving his little flag, but Ryan paid him no mind. His eyes were locked on the Gyarados. We’ve gotta try something drastic.

“Hard turn!” Ryan ordered his Pokemon. “Let’s regain the lead!”

On the next bend, Ryan’s Dragonair cut hard, making such a sharp turn that the trainer was nearly flung into the water. He held on just barely and ordered his Pokemon to take another sharp turn on the next one. He noticed how Misty was just barreling on with her Gyarados. Her Pokemon was sprinting, and as a consequence, it was swimming sloppily. It was taking its turns wide. Within three turns, Dragonair had closed on Gyarados again, nearly drawing level with it.

“Nice try, but not good enough! Let’s go offensive, Gyarados!” Misty yelled. “Use all of your power! Keep the sprint going!”

Her Gyarados roared. Water flung up around it, laying a lane for it to glide through unimpeded. Ryan urged Thurnax to remain in Gyarados’ wake to get a little boost too, but the Dragonair was too slow and was instead hit by the waves Gyarados had made, slowing it even further. To make matters worse, a line of four trainers were floating in front of them, just in front of the finish line, where the Pikachu was riding about on Squirtle. All four threw their Pokeballs at once, as Dragonair roared towards them. Out popped four Gyarados.

“You’ve gotta be kidding me.”

“Hyper Beam!” the trainers spoke in unison.

The light was blinding, so much so that Ryan had to shield his eyes and look away. The situation was quickly growing dire. His Dragonair couldn’t afford to dodge the attacks, for she would lose her momentum. There wouldn’t be enough time to regain it. The finish line was too close. And she couldn’t take the hits either, for even one Hyper Beam would have surely been enough to KO her - four would do some serious damage. He wasn’t about to let his Pokemon get hurt like that. I need to think of something… anything. Ryan thought as hard as he could, but there was nothing; his mind was numb from the hysteria of the race. It was all too much. And then he saw the waves. They were flying this way and that around the pool, courtesy of the race that was going on. One passed just in front of Ryan and Thurnax, between them and the incoming Hyper Beams. That gave Ryan an idea.

“Thurnax, Surf! Dive underwater!”

“Nieieie!”

Ryan took a big gulp of air and then pressed his body against Thurnax’s neck. At once, he felt his Pokemon surge forward on her Surf attack, riding a wave of her own creation. Under the water she went, below the Hyper Beams, below the churning currents. Ryan opened his eyes and saw the Gyarados straight ahead, bearing down on the finish line. ''Come on, come on! Just a little more!''

Thurnax was moving as fast as she could, torpedoing through the water and gaining on her foe. Ryan watched them get closer and closer to Gyarados. The Atrocious Pokemon was slowing up, running out of energy. Misty risked it all with a sprint, and now her Pokemon’s exhausted. Thurnax had kept a fast pace as well, but she had never gone all out as she was now. She had more energy, Ryan knew. And thus, they closed on Gyarados. The finish line was approaching; the Pikachu was screaming so loud, Ryan could hear it all the way under the water. His ears were popping, his lungs were screaming for air. Thurnax swam on, gaining speed, gaining distance, gaining hope. The closer she got to Gyarados, the faster she went, the more she realized she could win this thing. Ryan was feeling dizzy. He knew he couldn’t hold his breath much longer. He needed air. He needed to reach the surface. But he couldn’t let go. That would disqualify him. He squeezed Dragonair’s neck lightly, urging her forward. She got the message and boosted into a new gear, a speed yet unseen.

Gyarados was just about to pass the white ribbon that was hovering over the finish line when Thurnax broke the surface in an explosion of water. Before Misty had time to turn her head, Ryan and Thurnax crossed the finish line, the broken victory ribbon streaming around them. Ryan was panting heavily, and Thurnax collapsed in the shallow water just beyond the finish line, letting her trainer roll of her and lie in the shallows too, his chest heaving, his throat raw.

“Well done,” Misty said at last, riding her Gyarados over to Ryan. “I can't believe I lost! I thought I had it won, but you came up in the last second. Your bond with your Pokemon really shows. You two earned that victory together.”

All Ryan could do was muster up a hoarse laugh. His stomach was rumbling, and he was seeing spots. He wanted nothing more than to go back to the hotel and collapse in bed with a bowl of cereal.

Misty stopped just in front of Ryan and dismounted from her Gyarados. Wading into the water, she made her way over to Ryan and held out her hand. “All right! You can have the Cascade Badge to show you beat me!”

Ryan took the little glass drop of water from her hand and held it firmly. “Thanks! That was one heckuva race!” ''But your all-out offensive approach got you beat in the end. Sprinter never wins such a long races. Smart and steady wins the race.'' Beaming ear to ear, he got out of the pool and looked down at his Dragonair who had brought him the most miraculous of victories. “Hey, Thurnax, you did awesome!” He patted her on her tired head, and took out her Pokeball. “I’m so glad I have you as part of my team. Now how about we go get a little rest?”

“Nieie…!”

The Pikachu jumped off the Squirtle and ran over to Ryan on all fours. Once it reached him, it stood up on its hind legs and murmured. “Pika, pika, pikachu!”

“Hey, you look familiar!” Ryan said, kneeling down to observe the Pikachu further. “Haven’t we met before?”

Pikachu cocked its head. “Pikachu?! Chu!!”

Ryan stood up. He was faintly reminded of being handed a pillow once by this very same creature. A wide smile burst across his face. He turned back to Misty, who was tending to her tired Gyarados. “Hey Misty, tell Ash I said hi.” She won’t know I already saw him in the dressing room.

She looked up and gave Ryan a weird look before nodding silently. Ryan returned Thurnax to her ball and then grabbed his towel. Once he had dried off and put his clothes back on, he walked back to the Gym’s entrance. There was no sign of Ash, and that made Ryan think of Kelly and how she had left him in Viridian City. I’ll see her again, he promised herself. ''I’ll fight her in the finals of the Indigo League. Then she’ll finally respect me.''

Ryan stepped out of the Gym and was greeted by the bright light of day. Yet it was not that he saw. A dark shape descended upon him at that moment, and he felt a stinging sensation spread across his face. He was falling, falling to the paved ground. And when he hit the cement sidewalk, he felt Thurnax’s Pokeball slip from his grasp. Just as he began to wonder what - or who - had hit him, darkness covered the boy’s eyes, and he thought no more.

Trivia

 * This is the second longest story on the site! It is the 5th overall longest page on the entire wiki.